Page 24 of Her Desire

Shaking my head, I place my now empty glass on the table. “No, I need to forget about my worries,” I sigh.

Sarah tucks a strand of her brown hair behind her ear. We had met a week ago while I was enjoying an evening walk on the beach. She had been out with her kids and adorable boxer puppy. The dog, Winnie, had ran up to me and I had loved the puppy's kisses. We started chatting and found that we hadboth lived in Seattle at one point in our lives. She had quickly become a friend, and I enjoyed hanging out with her. Tonight, her husband had taken their kids to go see a movie and I now felt guilty that she was listening to me whine and complain about my relationship.

“Maybe you just need to talk to Sam,” Sarah offers.

“I want to, I really do, but she just doesn’t understand. It’s lonely being home by myself. I work from home, so I need human interaction sometimes,” I say.

Sarah nods. “I really do know what you mean. I didn’t work the first few years after the kids were born. It was a struggle trying to find time for myself and not feel lonely while my husband was at work.”

I appreciate her sympathy and listening.

“I love her, but I just don’t know how much more of her jealous behavior and loneliness,” I admit.

My own grief is consuming me. I know I can’t go on like this much longer. I need to talk to Sam and figure out what I am going to do.

We have one more round of drinks before I cut myself off from alcohol. As I leave the bar that night, I decide that I have to take Sarah’s advice and come clean with Sam about how I’m feeling. I just don’t know if we can make it past this or not.

Chapter 16

Sam

Hours later, the silence of the apartment clawed at my nerves until I couldn't stand it any longer. The door swung open, and there she was, glowing with an inner light that only freedom could kindle. And I hated it.

"Late night," I remarked, a venomous undertone seeping into the words.

"Sam, what—" Ava began, but I cut her off, a dam breaking inside me.

"Who were you with? Did you meet someone interesting? Someone who doesn't smother you?"

"Stop it!" Ava's voice rose, a crack of thunder in our stormy silence. "You promised you'd try, but here you are, interrogating me like I've done something wrong!"

"Maybe if you didn't make me feel like I need to!" I shot back, my temper flaring.

"Need to? Need to keep tabs on me? To question my every move? I can't live like this, Sam!" Ava's plea was a sharp jab to my already bruised heart.

"Then maybe you shouldn't!" The words erupted from me, a volcanic blast I couldn't contain. Immediately, regret flooded in, molten and suffocating.

"Is that what you want?" Her voice broke, and the sight of her, so small and defeated, gutted me.

"No, no, that's not what I meant." The room spun as the reality of what I'd said—and what it could mean—crashed over me.

We stood there, two people caught in an emotional maelstrom, the air between us thick with unsaid fears and unshed tears. Silence enveloped us, a blanket under which lay the shards of our argument.

I watched Ava pace back and forth in our small Miami apartment, the tension in her petite frame more pronounced than I'd ever seen it. The sinking sun cast long shadows across the room and on her face, illuminating a torment that seeped deep into my chest.

"Sam, I can't breathe here," she said, her voice breaking as if every word was a weight she had been carrying for too long. "Every step I take, you’re right there, looming over me. It's like... like I'm drowning in your constant vigilance."

A lump formed in my throat. Her brown hair, usually so meticulously kept, was pulled back into a messy bun, strands sticking to the wet trails on her cheeks. I wanted to reach out, to smooth them away, but my hands were shaking, betraying the turmoil that raged within me.

"Please, talk to me, Ava," I managed to say, though my voice sounded foreign to my own ears. "We can work this out. I didn’t realize—"

"Realize what? That you've turned my life into a schedule dictated by your insecurities?" She stopped pacing and faced me,her eyes fierce yet filled with an indescribable sadness. "I moved to Miami for a fresh start, not to be policed."

I swallowed hard, feeling each accusation like a knife twisting in my gut. I knew I loved her fiercely, maybe too much, but the realization that my love had morphed into something toxic was a bitter pill to swallow. Seeing Ava this way, cornered by the person who should have been her sanctuary, was devastating.

“You are mine. I brought you here to start a new life. You were broken when I met you. I showed you real love. No one has ever loved you the way I love you. Now, you expect me to share you with someone else when I gave you this life!” The words spilled out of my mouth like venom, and once they were out, I instantly regretted them.

"Sam..." Ava's voice was a whisper, but it felt like a shout in the quiet. I looked up to find her eyes brimming with tears, and I knew I’d crossed a line I never intended to approach.

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