Page 113 of Country Contract

“Harlow sure is an interesting girl,” he starts, and I know that I’m going to have some explaining to do based on his tone. I look over to Hunter, but he looks just as shocked as I am about the topic. When I look back at my dad, he has a knowing look in his eye.

“She is. I think everyone in this town has really come to enjoy her.”

“What about you?” he drills.

I think about denying him, telling him a basic answerlike she’s an interesting girl, and I’m glad she was a guest. Something like, yeah she’s a great friend for Cassidy and the kind of person Silas would get along with. My dad knows me better than that.

I look out the kitchen window into Hunter’s backyard. The grass is completely gold and brown now. My brother and I would fuck around in the backyard almost every day before or after dinner. We’d wrestle, play tag, soccer, baseball, or fetch with our dog. I wonder if my parents ever looked out this window and watched us play. Their close attention and hard work at being present parents taught them how to read us.

“I think . . .” I swallow hard and my dad gives me an empathetic look. “I think she’s amazing, Dad. Smart, funny, beautiful, weird in a fantastic way. It would just be so easy with her.”

“You think so?”

“How can I know if this is just the way I am? Do I do this with every woman? Do I think they’re all just so perfect?” I fight the urge to cry, and I hear a beer bottle being set on the countertop before big arms wrap around me.

“I love how easily you love. It’s a blessing and a curse. I wish other people could love as easily and strongly as you. I knew right away your mom was the one for me. One look at her and I was a goner. Hunter knew Cassidy was meant to be his girl. Love is strange and different for each of us. You’ve had so many loves in your life, but one day you’ll get that big, wild love, kid. You’ll know it’s different from the rest.”

And just like that, I let one tear loose as my dad holds me in the kitchen, and a moment later I feel Hunter wrap his arms around me, too.

“Shit will be hard, but you’ll come through on the other side,” Hunter says.

When we all release, I look at the two of them, and I feel a weight being lifted.

When Harlow leaves, I will be okay.

I’ll be hurt and sad.

I’ll feel lonely.

But I’ll be okay.

The timing couldn’t be more perfect; all the sides are ready, and we hear my mom and Cassidy greet Harlow in the front room.

This meal will be a good one, and maybe the last Harlow has with my family.

Although Harlow is here now, my family will be here forever. They’ll be my support system if I need it, but somewhere inside . . . I’m feeling like I might not.

“You write?” my mom asks Harlow at the table.

“Not professionally. I used to write here and there when I was young, and I thought that chapter was closed, but I guess I was wrong. There’s still some creativity up in here.” Harlow taps her temple and gets a pink tone on her cheeks, but smiles.

“A writer is a writer. You don’t have to write a bestseller to be a writer,” my mom encourages.

“She won’t show me anything, and I’m practically foaming,” Cassidy adds. I won’t let them know that I get little peeks at her work because I think that would put pressure on Harlow to share. I’m not the kind of person to pressure anything.

The table is decorated with a mix of everything. Down the center are all the foods everyone has put an effort into making. That’s how Cassidy likes it. She asked everyone to bring a plate set to her wedding and she wasgoing to keep her favorites. Now her house has an eclectic collection.

Harlow brought homemade tiramisu but swears she can’t share a recipe that she only knows by sight. She reports she is too scared to even write it down for herself.

Whenever she talks about Maria, I think of my mom. It’s hard for me to understand being closer to a woman who is paid to be there than your mother.

I think my dad is surprised by how much Harlow puts on her plate and even more surprised when she fills up a second one.

“Everything is so amazing.” Harlow beams, looking at Cassidy, specifically letting her know that her mac and cheese is always a favorite as she takes down another forkful.

“Definitely,” I add, also taking a bite.

“That mac and cheese is my favorite,” Hunter takes a mouthful.

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