Page 82 of Country Charm

I knew something was up that Sunday, and I am kicking myself in the ass for not saying anything then. I put her first and by doing that, everything is royally fucked.

She’s gone radio silent on me. Not a word from her since I said goodbye and left to get Jake’s and his mom’s things over to them. I ran to their house and grabbed things like a madman to get back to them at the hospital. Only to find that I didn’t need to rush at all. They were both sleeping like the dead when I got there. Knocked out for sixteen hours, only to wake up when the nurses would bug them.

They needed that heavy rest and Sharon needed the care. The bills they are going to get hit with are going to bring the two of them to their knees. I know she doesn’t have health insurance from the slime-ball diner owner.

The whole town has heard about them and pulled together to collect a small fund to help out with the fees; Iknow it won’t cover much, but the town will do whatever it can to help. I also know that some of the locals created a calendar to bring them food now that they have been discharged and are back home.

It’s one less thing they have to worry about. Jake is worried about getting back to work on the farm to start earning some cash again, but I told him his job is secure and he shouldn’t worry about that right now. They seem pretty well settled back into their home, but I know they are both anxious about the bottom dollar in this whole fiasco.

I can’t help but want to go that extra mile for them, because I know if my pop were here, he would do something for them. There is too much on my mind to focus on them alone.

Cassidy has taken to the forefront of my thoughts, and this whole silent treatment is causing me to damn near lose my mind. The only thing that gives me a single shred of peace is knowing that she has to be here at the end of the week for Mary’s wedding.

I don’t plan on crashing it and ruining Mary’s day. That would put me in deeper shit with her than I already am. I’ll wait until the festivities are over and approach her when she has that stressor off her shoulders.

My texts to her have been simple, avoiding putting pressure on her. I refuse to let her forget me, forget what we could have, forget how the last month has gone between us.

I’ve avoided poetry or passages this time because I don’t want her to view that as an act of manipulation. I would prefer her to enjoy those messages from me rather than look at them as an annoyance or suspect an ulterior motive.

My motive hasn’t changed. I still want to show her that we have something different, something special. She just needs to let go of her fear.

Shehas to let go of the idea that she can’t be the girl she is right now and be in a relationship. Cassidy can’t let go of the idea that by joining a partner she has to let go of who she is now. She can; hell, I want her to more than anything.

I want to embrace the woman she is.

I want to come home to find her curled up on the chaise, completely lost in her latest read.

I want to see that shocked look on her face when she realizes it’s the end of the day and she’s lost track of time, spending entirely too much of her day reading.

I want to see her sleepily shuffle down the hallway in search of coffee on Sundays after sleeping in, while I’ve already finished my day’s work.

I want to pull my ATV up to the main barn to find her swinging on the porch swing staring out into the large fields she also calls home.

I want to see her laughing freely with her girlfriends when we drive up to the city to see them.

I want her to find more purpose in a job, even if it means travel, if it can mean that she will eventually come home to our bed.

I want her to have it all.

I’m a little more irritable today than the rest of the week because I had Harrison cover the farm today and I’m driving back from the city after a failed attempt to catch her.

She is likely staying with one of her girls, but I have a sick knot twisting in my stomach, worrying she is already in search of a quick conquest to drive home the fact that she is not willing to change.

I’ve attempted to message Lynn, just to hear if she’s okay. But with their tight bond, I suspect she is complying with a request from Cassidy to let sleeping dogs lie.

As I drive back into town from the city I reflectmore on this whole thing. As much as I wanted to see Cassidy tonight, it’s for the best she didn’t just find me on her doorstep. She’d hear me out and send me on my way again, and the next time she’d probably just move altogether overnight.

I’m just about to pass the trailer park at the edge of town and decide to pull in to check on Jake and Sharon. I park my truck in their lot and shut everything off. The lights are on inside and the windows are slightly ajar, letting some music ring out into the night.

When I knock on the door, I’m surprised to find that Sharon opens it. She looks a hell of a lot better than she did the day I brought her back from the hospital, but still tired as all get out. She could probably use two more solid weeks of sleep before heading back into that diner. She smiles warmly at me and steps aside to grant me access to their small home.

“To what do we owe the pleasure,” she drawls. I see Lena and Jake in the kitchen, serving up plates and I immediately halt.

“I didn’t mean to intrude on dinner, I was just stopping by to see if y’all needed anything.” Sharon puts her hand on my shoulder and gives me a gentle shove.

“You’re not intruding on anyone. Grab this man a plate, Lena. We have more than enough after everything everyone’s been giving us.”

We all sit and dig into Ms. Hewitt’s Christmas casserole, lightly joking about how we should be glad this is usually only “gifted” to us once a year.

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