Page 22 of Hidden By the Gargoyle

I flopped down on the couch, throwing an arm over my damp face.

Who knew that trying to control your magic could make you break a sweat?

“We’re done for today,” my torturer said.

“I’m kinda wishing I was still fully human,” I replied.

My aunt laughed and sat down on the chair to the left of the couch. “Learning to access your magic is much easier when you’re younger. It’s also easier when you’re not blocked.”

I peeked at her from beneath my arm. “Any ideas what might be blocking me?”

“Unfortunately, no. Though witches whose power isn’t blocked or bound by a spell usually find that their block is caused by repressed emotion.”

My only response was to cover my eyes once again.

“Ally, you’ve been holding back for a long time. Maybe this is a sign that it’s time to let go.”

My throat felt tight at her words. I had to swallow hard before I could say anything in response.

“There’s nothing to let go,” I replied.

“Don’t lie to yourself or me. You and I both know you’ve kept your emotions in an iron grip since you were twelve.”

I didn’t argue with that because she was right. I’d had to. My grief had been so deep and so devastating that I’d had to lock my feelings away just to keep functioning.

The couch depressed next to my waist, and I lifted my arm so I could look up at Aunt Minnie.

“Even if you weren’t a witch,” she continued. “Shoving all those feelings back isn’t healthy for you in the long run. You need an outlet. Someone to talk to or another way to release them. Otherwise, you’ll be trapped by them for the rest of your life.”

Aunt Minnie ran a hand over my hair as she looked down at me. “And you deserve so much more than to be held prisoner by your emotions for a lifetime.”

The tears that had threatened earlier reappeared, welling in my eyes, and trailing down the sides of my face.

“I don’t know how,” I answered. It was a raw, honest reply.

“How to do what?” she asked, her tone as gentle as her fingers in my hair.

“How to talk about how I’m feeling. I’m afraid of what will happen if I do.”

“Afraid of rejection?”

I shook my head. “I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop. That if I start, it’ll all just pour out of me until there’s nothing left. Then, I’ll just be empty.”

“Or maybe that space will be taken up by happiness,” she pointed out.

“I’m happy,” I said, but even I could hear the defensiveness in my tone.

“You’re content,” she argued. “But I want far more than that for you, sweet girl. I want you to experience joy. Bliss. A happiness that transcends time itself.”

More tears escaped. I was too tired and too frustrated to control them. “I’m not sure that’s possible for me.”

A soft smile spread across her face. “I am. I know that you’ll have that if you just let yourselffeel.”

“You’ve seen it? In a premonition?”

Aunt Minnie shook her head. “No. I haven’t seen more than a few moments into your future in a few days. Sommerton’s attack was the strongest vision I’ve had. Just like there’s a block on your magic, there’s a block on my visions. All I know for certain is that you’re safest with Dax and that you’ll awaken the blood god.”

I scooted back and propped my shoulders against the arm of the couch. “What about Sommerton and Leona?” I asked, thinking about my conversation with the warlock today.

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