As tears form in my eyes, he takes a step closer to me and caresses my cheek, replacing Grayden’s sting. He uses his thumb to wipe the lone tear making its way down my flushed face and I lean into his touch, closing my eyes. The ring he wears is cold against my skin. If I don’t leave soon, I’m afraid of what I’ll say to keep him close. The secrets I’m willing to whisper, the truth on the tip of my tongue.
“Arra, did he do anything? Did he put his hands on you?”
Without the wordLady, it feels intimate to hear my false name on his lips. Even if it’s not my real name, I love the way he says it. He says it like a prayer, and not for the first time, I wish he knew to call me Izadella.
To hear that would truly be a gift.
It would mean I could be honest with him, that he could truly know me.
When I do not respond immediately, he must fear the worst because concern leaves his face and is replaced wholly with anger at the implication the silence brings.
I shake my head and lie. “Just vulgar words and vague…threats.” Threats, promises of whatever nightmare he has imagined for the cursed day he becomes king. “Did he follow me?”
He shakes his head. “No, the royal family retreated to their chambers for the evening. Arra, you need to leave,” he whispers, his breath on my skin with the closeness of a lover.
I only have a moment to say goodbye but the words are caught in my throat. How do I tell a man I barely know what light hebrought to my life in such a short time? That even if my words were a falsehood, my feelings for him were forever true?
“Arra, do you hear me?” he asks over the sound of the rain that starts to fall, pelting the glass that surrounds us. I nod dreamily without comprehending his words. His hand still touching my face is all I can think about. I want his hands touching me everywhere. He closes the space between us, our chests touching now. What was he saying, for me to leave?
“I’ll go home,” I whisper, looking at his lips.
“No, not home anymore. Home isn’t safe.”
That pulls me out of my thoughts. I almost laugh at the thought of the Ellovian palace not being safe, but if Grayden has the coronation fruit, we might all be in danger. Then I realize he speaks of the false life I’ve built here in Adreania, a life built on outright lies and half-truths. The little apartment above an empty jewelry shop that never opened with three children whose names I can never remember.
“Tomorrow after sunset, take your family to the fisherman’s cove. There you will find a tavern on the north side with a blue door, the Black Bell. In the darkest corner, find a grumpy fisherman named Oliver. He owns a boat calledHanolis’ Sun. Give him this.”
He removes his hand from my cheek, leaving it so cold it’s tempting to grab his palm and put it back. Leon holds out a necklace I recognize. He had commissioned me to make it the night we first met, years ago. AnAis etched on the oval gold locket. My hand shakes as I take it. The tangled chain is warm from his pocket.
I opened the little door to find a tightly folded note.
He covers it with his palm. “Do not open it yet. Only open it when you meet with him. It’s his instructions to take you and your family away from here. You will leave and sail to safety. Grayden will destroy everything when he inherits the crown and you need to be somewhere safe. Please, let me protect you.”
He watches me slip the locket into my pocket before continuing.
“I have a small plot of land waiting. The house is old but has enough room for everyone. The local blacksmiths will help youstart over. You will not need to worry about anything; that I can promise. You will be safe. Your…husband—” He stumbles over the word. “—will be given work and your children an education. You can start over somewhere you will be cared for.” Pain and desire are etched in every line on his beautiful face. “Safe.”
His mix of sweet herbs and tart strawberry burns through me, leaving in its wake a fever of longing, of agony.
The desire to scream that there are no little ones or husband, that this has never been my home. I want to tell him who I really am and beg him on my knees to forgive me for lying for all these years, how desperately the truth begged to be told every time he stood before me.
He’s gone to such great lengths to ensure my safety, and it’s breaking my soul into shattered pieces of desperation. He stands close to me, but I need him closer, and I can hold back no longer. I wrap my arms around his center and draw him against me, no space left between us, and still he doesn’t feel near enough. His arms are instantly around me, clinging like he never wants to let me go.
I rest my forehead on his broad chest, savoring him.
The last few minutes we have left to share in this lifetime are over and I try to memorize every heartbeat we share chest to chest. Mine is swift like the beat of hummingbird wings, while his mortal one is slow and rhythmic. A bitter reminder that in a few decades he will fade away, but as fae, I will live on for hundreds of years without him. Our brief moments spent together under each full moon will be the only remnant of him. The last memory he existed at all in my life, a balm to soothe the ache his mortal death will one day bring.
I truly was a fool to fall for this mortal, but I can’t bring myself to regret him.
He’s never been this close before, always standing across the table from me when he bought my jewelry month after month. I want to get drunk on the smell of him, taste it on his skin. Run my tongue up his throat and…
“Healer Leon!” someone calls in the distance, and his armstighten around me. The faint press of his lips in my hair breaks something within me and I close my eyes, relishing the touch, desperate to stay with him.
“You need to go, Arra.” He whispers it in my ear, leaning down to press a soft, lingering kiss to my cheek. I nod, of course I do, but I still cling to him, not wishing to part from this man. The thought of doing so brings physical pain. He looks down at me with open longing, hunger in his eyes. “I will see you again, all right? Grayden will get what’s coming to him. Men like him always do. Trust me.” The last part he says through gritted teeth.
“Goodbye, Leon.” I press my lips together to keep myself from laying bare my agonized soul and ripping apart the tapestry of lies woven to him in this place.
“Healer Leon?” The guard’s voice shakes with uncertainty.