Page 72 of Redeem Me

It keeps coming back to that one word.

Deserve.

‘Do you think you don’t deserve to be happy? Is that what this is about?’

He shrugs. ‘If only you could see the thoughts inside my head.’

‘Everyone deserves to be happy. Do you think you were put on this earth to be miserable?’ I reach up and cup the back of his neck, forcing his face to look at mine.

‘I’ve had my share fair of misery.’

‘And now you have me. We’re supposed to be making the most of the here and now, remember? So, let’s do it.’

He pauses for a second, a thoughtfulness clouding his ebony orbs. ‘About that…’

A sinking sensation settles in my stomach. Is this the part where he calls it a day? Maybe the ‘L’ word did terrify him after all.

Or maybe he’s got tired of fucking me six ways to Sunday.

He’s a hot billionaire who could have any woman he wants. Did I really expect him to settle down with me, the nanny?

I’m not putting myself down. I know what I am and what I have to offer. I also know that it might not be enough for a man like Caelon Beckett.

We said we’d have some fun. I told him I wanted his penis, not a marriage proposal. It’s not his fault my vagina and my heart are tethered together with an invisible string. I knew what I was getting myself into. Hell, I even knew, given half a chance, I could fall hard. And the thing about falling is that there’s always a risk of getting hurt.

‘I’m tired of sneaking around with you,’ he admits in a husky tone.

‘It’s okay.’ I slide my hand from his neck, but he catches it and places it on his sculpted chest. Beneath the smooth, hard muscle, the steady thrum of his heart flutters beneath my fingertips.

‘I think we should come clean to Dermot.’

‘What?’ My head snaps up.

‘You’re mine, Ivy. Sneaking around feels wrong, like I’m ashamed of what we have. I’m not. You waltzed into my life and lit it up like Fourth of July fireworks. You made my house a home again.’ The tortured look in his eyes switches to one of tenderness. ‘You’re not going anywhere at the end of the summer. Youwillcome to James’s wedding with me. I want to give this thing between us a real shot, if you’re up for it, that is.’ A rare flash of vulnerability ignites in his pupils.

My heart slams against my ribcage in an erratic rhythm. Emotion squeezes the air out of my lungs.

‘If I’m up for it.’ A breathy laugh floats from my lips. ‘You could suggest we move to Antarctica, and I’d probably agree. I’ve been obsessed with you from the second you put your hands inside my panties.’

‘It always comes back to sex with you, doesn’t it?’ His face dips closer to mine until our foreheads are touching. ‘Horny brat,’ he whispers.

‘It does help that you’re particularly skilled in that department, but truthfully, I like being with you. Your house is the first one where I’ve felt at home. I’ve always enjoyed my job, but minding your kids has never felt like work. I adore them.’

He presses a tender kiss to my temple. ‘Which is why we should tell Dermot.’

‘Not yet! Please. He’ll freak out. I don’t want anything to taint what we have. I don’t want to cause a showdown. I don’t want you to have to choose between me and him.’

Caelon huffs out a breath. ‘It will be you, Ivy. Spoiler alert, I’m crazy about you. But he’s my best friend, my only friend, other than my brothers. I hate lying to him. My brothers know. The staff know. He deserves to know.’

His words are a balm to my soul, but from behind his rose-tinted glasses, he’s forgotten how protective my brotheris of me. ‘He does – just not yet.’ Dermotwillflip. I don’t want the pressure of that on Caelon, on our new relationship. I’m not ready to test its strength yet. ‘You’re not lying to him. It’s a tiny little omission – for now.’

‘There’s nothing tiny about it.’ His hands skirt over my waist. ‘I’d rather he heard it from me than saw it splashed all over the tabloids. We’ve already had one near miss.’

‘Let’s give ourselves a bit more time.’ I trace the lines of his six-pack.

‘Fine, but I’m going to plant the seed. That way, it’ll be less of a shock when the time comes.’

I refuse to waste the remainder of the weekend discussing my brother. I reach inside his waistband again. ‘The only seed you’re planting should be between my legs.’

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