Page 85 of Tainted

“How come you didn’t tell me?”

“You never asked.”

“Everything doesn’t have to be top secret. Not with me.”

“You haven’t told me about yours either,” I countered, breaking my concentration to give her eye contact.

Zara was growing annoyed but decided to extend an olive branch, hoping I would return the favor.

“I don’t know my biological father. I've never met him. I couldn’t even tell you his name,” she shared, twirling the ring on her finger. I noticed the subtle gesture, the telltale sign of her nerves. “My dad is with Shana. He got her an upgrade for their tenth wedding anniversary, so she gave me the old one as a reminder that if a man doesn’t treat me the way Dad treats us, he’s not the one.”

“Shana sounds smart,” I replied between picking Zara up and sitting her on my lap.

“She’s something.”

“Now, it’s your turn.”

“Why are you so nosey?”

“I’m not. I just like knowing things,” she admitted, fingering my locs because the conversation made her antsy.

“Knowing things can be just as shitty, sometimes it’s better to keep shit tucked.”

“You can tell me anything. I like knowing things about you.”

Her response hit me like bricks because there were so many that she didn’t know about. Zara meant it as much as she could because she didn’t see the mess inside me to know how slippery that slope was.

“Do you look like Shana?”

“She would say so, but I disagree. I mean, I’m pretty, but she’s beautiful.” Zara rambled until she caught herself narrowing her gaze. “You almost got me. You can’t push your way into my life and not let me into yours.”

“She thought about my dad, and it hit her hard. Hit me hard too.”

“What happened to him?”

“He had high blood pressure for years, but he ignored it. Skipped check-ups and ignored the symptoms. Thought he could handle it on his own.”

"He never said anything. Not even to your mom?”

“He was too proud and didn’t want us worrying about him. Thought it was just part of getting old,” I shrugged.

I reclined, staring at the ceiling because looking at the sympathy in Zara’s eyes was hard to watch. I guess Pops couldn’t bring himself to tell Mom the truth.

“It was too late when we realized something was wrong. His kidneys were failing. He didn’t want anyone hovering over him, so he didn’t tell us.”

By the time he did, it wasn’t shit he could do to ease Loriann’s gut-wrenching cry. He’d failed, and I wondered if he had it to do over again, would he have chosen differently?

“Kidney failure,” she whispered, placing a hand on my arm. “I’m sorry, Kenyon. That’s tough.”

I ran a hand over my face.

“Watching him go downhill, knowing it didn’t have to be that way if he’d just taken care of himself. If he loved her more than life itself like he claimed, why the fuck would he do that to her. Even if he couldn’t accept it for himself, do it for her.”

The grief I'd been trying to suppress all night suddenly became too much to hold back. My throat tightened, and before I knew it, a single tear escaped down my cheek. Zara leaned in and gently dabbed it with her thumb, wiping it away. She just sat close like she was shielding me from everything I didn’t want to face.

“So this is theNova Special? Taking nigga’s in VIP and wiping their tears? That’s how you get deep in their pockets, huh?”

But Zara, being Zara, didn't let the moment get awkward. She leaned forward, a playful smirk tugging at her lips, “What tears?”