Page 79 of High Stakes

“I am so sorry, Miss May. We can’t locate your baby’s heartbeat. Your measurements show that the fetus is fifteen weeks, but I’m afraid you have miscarried,” he says, “We need to discuss the next steps so can I ask you to stay here whilst I speak to my colleague, and we’ll be back shortly.”

They leave and Cal pulls me into his arms, but I feel numb, the words from the doctor running through my mind. Maybe they’ve got it wrong. He didn’t even look old enough to know anything about medicine.

A nurse returns to get us, leading us to an office where the doctor is waiting. We sit down and he gives me his condolences again before adding, “So, moving forward.” At my scowl, he shifts uncomfortably. “Because your bodyis showing no signs of expelling the fetus, we will need to perform a procedure called a dilation and curettage. It’s a surgical procedure and basically it just means that we will remove the contents of your uterus.” He says it so matter of fact that I don’t quite take in what he’s talking about. A nurse who’s been standing at the back of the room moves forward and crouches down in front of me.

“I know this is really hard for you, taking all of this in now when you have just had the worst news ever. But what Doctor Veale is trying to say is that if we don’t do this procedure now, then you’re prone to serious infection. Your baby has already been in there for some time, and we can’t risk waiting.” I smile sadly, liking that she at least referred to it as my baby.

“When?” Cal asks.

“We can rush her down today, within the hours,” she confirms, and I inhale sharply. I came in here with a baby, and I’ll be leaving without one. I give a slight nod and she smiles, gently rubbing my hand.

The doctor continues, going over the procedure and informs me of all the risks. I sign the papers without really taking in anything he has said. I’m on auto pilot.

The nurse then takes me to the surgical ward, where I’m given a sedative to relax my cervix. Cal sits by my bed, hishead in his hands. “You can go, Cal. You don’t want to be here for all this,” I say with a sigh.

He glances up, “How could you ever think I’d leave you to face this alone?” he asks, “You’re my best friend, I’m not going anywhere.”

I smile gratefully. “Thank you.”

“Do you want me to ring anyone, Aria or maybe Aiden?” he asks.

“No, I’ll tell them once this is done and I’m back home.” I let my head fall back, “I hate that I didn’t tell Aiden,” I admit. “I feel bad.”

“At least he doesn’t have to go through this heartache,” he says sadly, “You’ve saved him a lot of pain.”

Aiden

“JP, have you spoken to Aria? I’m just outside the shop now and both shops are closed. I can’t get hold of Bella,” I say into my mobile.

“No boss, not spoke to her all week. Do you want me to call her?”

“No don’t worry, I’ll go to Bella’s.”

Since Bella heard me out over a week ago, I’ve been sending her the odd text to see how she is. But yesterday she had her scan, and when I asked how it went, she didn’t reply. I haven’t been able to shift the bad feeling in the pit of my stomach all day. Which is why I’m here, to see formyself. But seeing both bakeries closed, has only worried me more, so I head to Cal’s.

When he opens the door, he doesn’t look pleased to see me. I don’t blame him. He’s got every right to hate me. “Come in,” he says, before I even explain why I’m here.

He leads me through the apartment and lightly taps on a door before entering. Bella is sat up in bed watching television. She looks terrible. Her skin is pale, and her eyes are red and puffy.

“Bella, you have a visitor,” says Cal gently and she startles like she didn’t know we were even here.

Her eyes fall on me, and they fill with tears. “What’s happened?” I ask, moving past Cal and entering the room.

She doesn’t speak, and I look back at Cal whose eyes are tearful too. “I need to go to the pharmacy to collect her prescription. Can you stay with her until I get back?” he asks, and I nod.

Once he’s left, I turn back to Bella. She’s quietly sobbing into her hands. I sit on the bed opposite her and gently pull her hands away from her face. “Bells, what’s going on?”

“The baby’s gone.” Her voice is barely a whisper.

I pull her to me, holding her against my chest and feeling every ounce of pain as she sobs. “Oh, Bells, I’m so fuckingsorry.”

After a few minutes I shift us back around so that my back is to her headboard and I wrap an arm around her, holding her into my side.

“You’re still watching these shit films,” I tease, noting that she’s watching her favourite romance again.

She wipes her nose on a crumpled tissue. “It’s my favourite,” she whispers.

“Are you in any pain?” I ask, hating that thought.