“I was more afraid of her stopping than of getting out of there. I felt… I don’t know. Crazy. I’m not… I’m not very, ah, experienced with anything revolving around sex, so I wasn’t sure what was going on.”
I nodded. The moment the doctor had turned her power onto me, I was truly a doomed man. It had been so easy; so casual. Her hand against my cheek—just that single touch—had sent me reeling into an abyss of desire. If she’d turned that on this woman, a woman, who admittedly was a stranger to sex, I’m sure it would have been overwhelming.
My gut clenched. What if, instead of asking me to protect Magda, Lowe had instructed me to go out and take out the backup team? Would I have really…?
Magda wasn’t even exerting her will over me; if she was, it was so subtle I couldn’t feel it. But if Archbishop Benedict himself tried to come for her right now, I wouldn’t pull mypunches. I’d kill him where he stood before he could get within spitting distance. Was her ability so strong? Was it because we’d been together that I felt this way?
I’d felt the doctor’s power; I’d buckled under the force of it. I knew the dangers of the succubi because I had to admit it, if to no one else, not to a confessional in the Church, not to Jax, then at least to myself, that when the demon had turned that incredible control on me… If she’d asked, I would have gone out and killed the entire team, and I wouldn’t have cared if I knew them. Wouldn’t have given two shits if they were men I’d gone to school with; maybe even grew up with in the organization’s dorms or had beers with outside of seminary.
Iwouldhave murdered every one of the men they’d sent after us; so why hadn’t she ordered me to? I’d been in tougher fights with bigger beasts. I clenched my fists, trying not to think about it anymore. Dr. Lowe hadn’t wanted a weapon, or she would have used me as one. She’d wanted me to be a shield for Magda. She’d wanted us alone, cozily tucked into a little place somewhere with only a bed so that once Magda woke up, dripping with need to be awakened, the tide of our desire would spill over, and we would complete each other.
It still didn’t explain why this girl was so important that she’d gone to such lengths to ensure the transition would take place.
Dr. Lowe’s power had been heady and deep; so demanding that it could—and would—bring men crawling on their knees at her whim. I’d never felt that with Magda. With her, there was something…
Different.
You keep thinking that. Since you first saw her.
Even when her power surged the first moment she’d woken, it hadn’t sought to control me, as Dr. Lowe’s had. It had been inviting; the crooking finger of a lover. It had drawn me to her without her even trying. Like a moth to the flame, I’d gonehappily, even though somewhere in the back of my head, I knew it was going to burn me to death.
If I could just keep my dick under control for one minute, I might be able to figure out what I’m clearly missing from this situation.
The twitching in my groin promised that wasn’t going to happen any time soon. “Did you know Dr. Lowe was a succubus when you went to meet her?”
“No,” Magda said, shaking her head. “I was there for… therapy, and I’d gotten overwhelmed. I was about to leave, but then she just kept touching me—led me to an office and let me sit, and then… it all happened so fast. She told me I was a succubus. She asked me if she could help me, and I said yes. I didn’t know what she’d meant…”
My brow rose at that. “You’d never known that about yourself, so how could she?”
“It seemed like some kind of, I don’t know, weird sex thing at first?—”
“Not far off, I suppose,” I interjected. At Magda’s exasperated look, I shut my mouth. “Ah, sorry. Go on. What happened next?”
“Well,” said Magda, tapping her chin, brow furrowing, “things started to get hazy, and she was talking to me about how I needed some kind of ‘awakening,’ and then she asked if that was okay. She asked if she could kiss me, and it felt so incredible to have someone touch me the way she had, I just… I wanted more.”
“Did she do anything else?”
Magda touched her mouth. “She just kissed me. Something inside of me… there was this feeling like a snap, or… oh I don’t know. But I’ve never kissed a woman before. It was… really nice, actually. Different from men. She was soft and smelled really good”—she turned to me with a look of embarrassment—“notthat you don’t. Smell nice, I mean. I… I really enjoyed kissing you, too.”
She ducked her head and I carefully adjusted my position so that nothing about the way her comment affected me would be blatantly obvious.
“She mentioned that you had an appointment with her.”
“My friend Katie made me go. I was there to talk to her about… well,” Magda paused, sheepishness clouding her gaze. Her horns and teeth had receded for the moment, so at least appeared to be calming down a bit.
“It’s all right—just start from the beginning,” I said.
I didn’t know why it was so important now, how or why Magda knew Dr. Lowe. I’d willingly slept with a succubus and started us both down the path to demonic awakening. Manipulated by the organization, the doctor, and even my own body, just so I could be trapped into doing exactly what they’d wanted from the start.
Harry… that bastard.
The best I could hope for now was to get Magda safely back to her home and then run—but that would mean explaining things to her: about the Church. About what I’d really been doing there. About how much danger she was in if the organization discovered her. We could only hide out for so long. Throwing myself on the mercy of the organization had ended rather poorly—especially now that I’d beaten up the archbishop’s son and most of his team—so there could be no screwups.
They’d find me right away; theyalwaysfound agents that ran—even if there was only a body left to recover. Within the core of my being, I knew I had to protect Magda from them. Even if it meant never touching her again. Even if it meant taking the truth of her existence with me to the grave. The thought of her becoming like the veiled sister with Harry… I shuddered.
Magda reached for me, stretching an arm across the small distance between us and I grasped her hand without thinking, grateful, starving even, for her touch.
I am a doomed man.