Page 36 of Waiting for Gilbert

He doesn’t reply and panic jumps on my back because I’ve been 100%mewith Gilbert starting… when? When he tricked me into a driving lesson last night. Well, shucks. My rebrand isn’t going so well.

But it doesn’t matter. ThisliteralGilbert isn’t looking for anyone to start a family with because he’s building a house blah, blah, blah, and “too much needs done to play with girls.”

No problem.FigurativeGilbert is still out there. I’ll wait.

While I’m waiting for both aforementioned Gilberts to walk through my door, the hamsters spin their wheels.I never called Mom today. Should I change into something nicer? It’s weird not to have heard from Shaun at least once since the breakup. Does he even know that I’ve skipped town? Should I tell him? Why? Kinda thought I’d miss him more. This place would be cooler with a dishwasher. I guess most people living alone don’t do as much cooking as I do. Lauren’s going to love the little cross-stitch kit I bought her. I bet she’s halfway done by now. I hope my roommates were able to find someone else to take my room. Can I say no if John asks me out again? Do I want to say no? Or am I wanting to say yes to someone else? Crap, I think I asked him out.

I bounce over most of my scattered thoughts until I hit one that deserves an answer because she’s so accusatory.

Stop obsessing over boys.Simmer down. It’s not a crime to keep my eyes open for a potential husband.

Quit acting so desperate.I’m not! Making new friends is a good thing.

He doesn’t want to be your boyfriend.Even better. I’ll be normal and MAKE A NEW FRIEND.

What does that even mean? You’ve never been normal a day in your life.I don’t have to explain myself to you.

Perhaps you have too many friends and nobody is serious about you because you’re not serious?I’m not going to answer that.

Why don’t you have more female friends?Ugh. Because most of my friends are married and have babies and I love that for them, but I’m not in that place.

Aren’t you content in this season?Yes? Maybe? I don’t know. Psh, that’s not even a fair question. Ask any woman at any season if she’s content in that season.

But ARE you?Sure. But I’d like to have… more.

More?Yes, more. Now move along.

My phone chimes a moment before a knock sounds a few feet from where I sit at the table.

Gilbert: *GIF of Will Smith from ‘Fresh Prince’ knocking on the front door.*

I fling it open and a blast of winter flies inside.

He smiles. “Cordelia.”

I smile. “Gilbert.”

The hamsters go silent.

15

GILBERT

FRANK SINATRA—I GET A KICK OUT OF YOU

“May I come in?”

Cordelia blinks as if I’ve intruded on a private conversation.

“Please.” She waves me forward.

The mess of hair piled on her head bounces when she steps to the side and I smile at her range of colors. Fuzzy red socks, sunshine-yellow leggings, green hoodie, and her vibrant hair outshines the rest.

The door shuts behind me, but my feet won’t move. This woman is a magician of the best kind. My tired old kitchen has been transformed into a bakery. It’s strange because some of the surfaces are magazine-level perfect and others speak of the industry behind the production.

The round table that used to be in the center of the room has been shoved aside, blocking the hall. This leaves room for two tripods with light umbrellas and a third tripod with a camera. One half of the table displays a placemat with a cluster of candles and a serving tray with slices of pie. The rest of the table is strewn with papers, a laptop, a gray water bottle, and an open bag of jalapeño Cheetos.

Three pies inhabit the corner of the countertop with a dusting of powdery white stuff underneath and a wreath of holly leaves and sugared berries propped behind them. In stark contrast, the sink overflows with dirty bowls and dishes. By all appearances, the stacking method was designed by engineers with many letters behind their names and the addition of a single butterknife would send the modern art crashing to the floor.

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