Page 205 of Cowboys & Navy SEALs

She sniggered, then burst out laughing. “You’re such a moron,” she said in a singsong voice. “Can I have my pillow back?” she asked sweetly.

“I don’t think so, sugar lips.”

She groaned. “Sugar lips? Seriously? What else do you remember about me?”

“No matter how often you watch those silly Christmas movies on the Hallmark channel, you cry at the end.”

“True,” she conceded, “but who doesn’t?”

“I don’t.”

She smirked. “Yeah, because you’re a hardened Navy SEAL.”

“Ex-Navy SEAL,” he corrected.

“The name may’ve changed, but the job’s still the same.”

The tone of the conversation had shifted faster than the government in a third world country. He cringed at the bite in Addie’s voice. There it was—the one thing they could never get beyond, his profession.

“Superman has to save the world,” she said dourly.

He stiffened. “As Irish philosopher Edmund Burke said, ‘The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is forgood mentodo nothing.’” This was met with a stony silence that crawled over him like a dozen hornets. “I’ll have you know that I’m doing a lot of good.”

“Yeah, you’re humble about it too,” she shot back. “You sure you’re not on some thrill-seeking ride? Running from real-life responsibility?”

The game was afoot now, each of them volleying to get their point across. “Not everyone who joins the SEALs is running from something. Some are running to something.”

“Or using it as penance.”

The comment was a knife in the gut. Addie knew him too well, knew how to hit him where it hurt the most. His eyes narrowed. “You sound just like my mama.”

“How’s your mama, by the way?” she said lightly. “Is she still the belle of the country club?”

He grunted. “More like the queen.”

Addie laughed. “Yep, she rules the roost, for sure.”

“Like somebody else I know,” he muttered under his breath.

“I love your mama. She’s a hoot.”

“She loves you too.” Even though Maddox and Addie had never spoken of marriage, his mama was already picking out invitations and planning the wedding when Addie dumped him. His mama was almost as devastated about the breakup as he was. Not really, but she was crazy about Addie.

“Is your daddy still trying to get you to become an attorney and join his firm?”

“No, he gave up on that years ago,” he said mechanically, still smarting over Addie’s jab. Darkness cocooned around him, making it easier to open a conversation about sensitive issues. “You know, you shouldn’t keep blaming me for Corbin’s mistakes. He’s the one who ran out on you. I didn’t.” He was tempted to add that Addie was the one who gave up on them, not the other way around.

“And you shouldn’t spend the rest of your life feeling guilty about B. J.’s death. Time to move on,” she snipped.

He flinched. “Had I known you were gonna keep throwing B. J. in my face, I never would’ve told you about him.”

“Yeah, well, the same goes for Corbin.”

The chasm between them expanded larger than the ocean as they lay there like defiant warriors, refusing to give up their ground. His thoughts went to B. J. In his high school days, Maddox was an extreme sports fanatic and dreamed of one day making it to the X Games. That all changed the day B. J. was killed in a dirt biking accident. Maddox and B. J. were determined to prove which of them was the toughest. They started out jumping makeshift ramps and hills. As the day wore on, the challenges got greater until finally Maddox dared B. J. to jump a creek. Maddox went first and cleared it without issue. B. J., however, wasn’t as lucky. He fell short of the goal and his biketook a nose-dive. B. J. was thrown off his bike. He was rushed to the hospital where he died a few days later.

Maddox had opened up to Addie, sharing his anguish and guilt over B. J.’s death. He drifted aimlessly for the next few years, became a menace, in and out of trouble with the law. His dad had to bail him out of jail a few times. Eventually, Maddox got himself straightened out and traveled the world, taking on freelance writing and photography projects. It was easier to wander strange lands and learn about other cultures than it was to stay in Alabama and worry about his own problems. When that ran its course and he could no longer find any fulfillment in it, Maddox joined the Navy. Yeah, maybe his entry into the SEALs was at first fueled by a desire for penance, but as a SEAL, he’d found his life’s purpose. Now, that purpose continued as he worked for Sutton’s security company.

Two weeks ago, on his first assignment, Maddox and his former SEALs saved the life of a young daughter of a diplomat who’d been kidnapped for ransom. He clenched his jaw. As much as he loved Addie, he couldn’t give up who he was for her. Doing that would mean running the risk of losing himself and his newfound purpose. The problem was, he still hadn’t figured out how to live without Addie. She consumed his thoughts every day. Now that he was here with her, the longing intensified to the point where he could hardly stand it. He wanted both—his profession and Addie. Was that too much to ask for?

---