Page 38 of Save Me

“Anything else?”

“No, just you,” I respond truthfully.

“Good girl,” he says, and the line goes dead.

And for the first time in a long time, I feel a sense of hope sprout within me, realizing that for a moment I was able to focus solely on Jax and my own feelings of pleasure, able to chase happiness without the thought of anything or anyone else intruding. I close my eyes as I revel in the afterglow of this moment.

*

I take adeep breath as I slowly stretch my body, groaning as I unfurl from the fetal position I was sleeping in. Sheets I don’t remember crawling under are snug around me, and I jolt upwards at the realization that I don’t remember how I got here, on this bed, and a familiar sense of panic starts to take over.

“Easy, love.” The soothing voice comes from beside me.

I jump as I turn towards the other side of the bed, where Jax is sitting with his back against the headboard, shirtless and with a book in his hands. It takes me a minute to find my bearings, toremember where I am and how I got here, and as soon as I do, the panic is quickly replaced by something more, as a sense of calm desire floods my veins. I don’t think he could get any sexier if he tried, and I don’t think he even realizes the effect he has on me during these everyday moments, reading shirtless as his muscles are defined in the glow of the lamp beside him.

“Did it only take one orgasm for me to tire you out?” he asks with an unmistakable glimmer in his eyes as he folds the corner page in his book before setting it down.

I swat at him playfully as I inch closer to him, curling into him as I soak in the heat radiating from his body.

“Thank you—for that,” I say awkwardly, and I feel the heat rush to my cheeks as I yawn, still waking up from my blissfully dreamless nap.

“You never have to thank me for something I want to do.” He smiles. “I’m glad you had fun.”

“I’ve never done it before, and it was good. More than good.”

“Well that makes it a first for both of us.”

My mouth drops open at his confession, and it’s hard for me to imagine Jaxnotbeing experienced with something. He radiates a confidence that just makes me assume he’ll be showing me the ropes when it comes to everything in life.

He laughs at my stunned expression, and I can’t help but smile back at him.

“I know what you’re thinking,” he says playfully. “I’m just that good at everything in the bedroom it’s hard to imagine me as anything except well-versed…”

“Good at everything except being modest,” I quip back.

Jax lets out a playful growl before scooping me up and positioning himself on top of me. I relish the feeling of his body touching mine, allowing myself to melt into the mattress, absorbing as much of him as he’ll give me.

His lips meet mine and I close my eyes. I love the feel of him against my skin and the taste of him in my mouth. He stops as he gently caresses my cheek with his thumb, looking at me with a penetrating gaze, filled with a depth of care I’ll never get used seeing.

“What if this doesn’t work?” I ask, trying to keep the worry at bay. “What if I don’t want anything more than this for a while?”

“Then I’ll wait,” he responds simply.

“I appreciate your… patience with me,” I say, wanting to get this off my chest. “I know it’s probably not easy for you to wait for me to… be ready for more. I know that this, whatever this is between us, is based off a lot of… sex, and I’m sorry if I’m messing that up by being like this but—”

Jax’s mouth finds mine again, stealing my breath and silencing the words before they can leave my lips.

“I would wait a lifetime for you, so there’s no rush when it comes to your healing, no pressure to do anything that you don’t feel ready to do. I’m here every step of the way, whether you need a week, a month, a year, or longer, I’ll wait for you until I no longer breathe.”

Emotion grips me firmly as I let his words sink in.

“And as far as not knowing whatthisis between us…” He trails off and my breath hitches as butterflies take over my body. “Thisis everything, love.Youare everything. You are the oxygen I need to breathe, the fire I need to burn. You are the sky and the moon, and the sun, and all of the stars in the universe. And I love you, with every essence of my entire being, I loveyou. Sothis, love, is you and me, forever. I am yours until the end of time, and don’t you ever forget it.”

I reach up, pulling him in for another kiss, my mouth consuming his, and his consuming mine.

“I love you more than life itself, Jax Turner.”

CHAPTER 17

---