Page 46 of Crying in the Rain

“I’ll try,” Ade said and ended the call. “OK. Let’s get this show on the road.” His determination renewed, he brought up that number for what he hoped was the last time.

It rang out, once, twice—

“Fergus Campbell.”

“Hey, it’s Ade.”

Fergus didn’t respond.

“I’ll be home at five. Come and get your stuff.” Ade hung up, deleted Fergus’s number from his favourites and dropped hisphone onto the desk. His hands were shaking so much he had to grab the arms of his chair to still them.

He wasn’t sure how long he sat there, playing out all the ways this evening could go wrong, before his phone beeped with a notification that he couldn’t access because his fingers had gone numb. He was expecting a terse text message from Fergus, but there was nothing from him at all. Instead, there was a friend request from Shaunna, with a message—whatever happens—and a text message from Kris.

Glad you’re OK. I’m going to hang around at work, so I’m close by. x

Unworthy, said the voice in Ade’s head, at the same time as the knock came, followed by Pip’s cautiously smiling face peeking around the door. Ade growled in exasperation.

“I came to see if—”

“Yes. I’m fine,” Ade snapped. “I just wish everyone would leave me alone!”

Pip shrugged. “You got it,” she said and stepped back out, banging the door shut.

“Shit.” Ade bolted from his chair and ran after her. “Pip, wait! I’m sorry. Please?”

She was already halfway to the lift, but she stopped and turned around. “You asked me to come!” Her quietly hissed words sounded a lot angrier than if she’d been yelling at the top of her voice. “I know you, Ade. You’re frightened, and you have every right to be, but don’t you dare push me away, not now, not after everything you’ve been through.We’vebeen through.”

She stood before him, looming vast and formidable, even though at five foot three her head only reached Ade’s nose. He was stunned by her anger, but it was justified, and she was right. She’d been at his side through it all, witnessed Fergus systematically destroying him. Not once had she grumbled when Ade asked her to take him to hospital or to come and stay over because Fergushad left but he might come back. Through all of it, Pip had been there, and now Ade was telling her he didn’t need her, but he did. He really did.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.

“Whatever,” Pip said. “Don’t you think I want this to be over too?”

Ade nodded but kept his head bowed. “I didn’t mean to shout at you. I’m trying to keep it together so I’m in right frame of mind to face him.” Ade looked at his wrist. “Damn.” No watch. “What time is it?”

“About ten past four. I’ve just finished and thought you might like to come across the road with me, top up your Dutch courage, but if you’d rather not have the company…”

“No. I mean, yes. I’d love your company. I don’t even know why you put up with me.” Ade’s eyes filled with tears of gratitude.

“Oh no,” Pip said. “Don’t fall apart on me now. You have to be strong, Ade. Come on. We’re getting out of here.”

“OK.” Ade nodded. “Yes, OK. But I’m thinking I should maybe give the Dutch courage a miss.”

“Good,” Pip said coolly. She was hurting and making sure he knew it. “Get your jacket,” she instructed. “I’ll wait here.” She folded her arms.

Ade speed-walked back to his office, grabbed his coat and phone and returned to the lift. Pip must’ve called it already, as it arrived as he did. They stepped inside.

“Cauliflower cheese tomorrow,” she said.

“Excellent. Save me some?”

“I might.”

If I’m still alive to eat it?

They went to the pub across the street, bought non-alcoholic drinks and sat in a back corner, out of direct line of sight of the door yet still able to see who came and went in the mirror opposite the bar.

“You know what’s really wound me up?” Ade said once they’d gossiped about inconsequential stuff and were both a littlecalmer. “I think he was seeing someone else, and it shouldn’t matter, because we broke up ages ago.”

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