Page 97 of The Au Pair Affair

He knew, too, didn’t he? That spreading pain beneath his collar that rose slowly and choked him left no room for doubt. This was the widow-maker. The career ender. His spine was being twisted in the hand of the devil, around and around, until black started to bleed into the edges of his vision, freezing sweat coating every inch of his body.

And he had no choice but to stop trying to stand up.

Humiliation stabbed into him from all sides. Denial. Anger. Resentment.

Tallulah’s concerned face appeared in his mind, her clear pity pissing him off all the more, his fist coming down and slamming into the ice while the trainer asked him questions he couldn’t process or acknowledge. Not while she remained, so young and free-spirited and optimistic, looking down at him, a broken heap. A man who was once someone great.

But could no longer be that for her.

As soon as she watched the injury happen on television, Tallulah started to move. She was still staying in Chloe’s apartment, but all her stuff remained at Burgess’s place, forcing her to go there in a blur and pack essentials even though she could barely focus. Could hardly summon the brain power to text Ashleigh and confirm Lissa would stay with her mother until Tallulah returned. Booking a flight to Pittsburgh when the tears wouldn’tstop forming in her eyes was not easy, but she did it, her hands shaking as she ordered an Uber and organized a flight on the way to the airport, the phone slipping out of her hands and into her lap several times. She didn’t stop to consider flying to be by his side might not be her place... yet. She just went.

Her heart demanded nearness to Burgess, and she obeyed blindly, dread breathing fire like a dragon in her chest.

When Tallulah reached the airport, she got through security as quickly as possible and jogged to the gate, since her flight was already boarding. And there, on every television screen she passed, was the moment Burgess went down. People grouped together, watching in silence, muttering things into their phones. This was Boston after all. This was his town. But seeing their obvious grief did nothing to comfort her. No. Only the opposite.

If they believed Burgess was done... did he believe that, as well?

Was it true?

If so... oh God, Burgess was going to be devastated.

Of course, he would.

He loved hockey more than anything in the world. The sport was interwoven with his identity. And he was spectacular at it. On some level, she’d foreseen more problems arising with his back injury, but this? So public and brutal and painful to watch. He didn’t deserve that.

The flight time was only ninety minutes, but it might as well have been five hours. Tallulah stared straight ahead the whole way, cobbling together a speech to deliver as soon as she reached... wherever he was. The hospital, the hotel, the arena. She’d already texted Chloe to find out from Sig where Burgess had been taken and hoped to have that information as soon as the plane landed. And she’d be ready. She’d wrap her arms around him and assure him that he wasn’t finished with hockey forever. If he wanted to keep playing, he’d go to rehaband come out stronger. On the flip side, if he needed to stop playing, so much life was waiting to be lived.

With her.

With them. Together.

She’d made the decision to move back in with Burgess and Lissa as soon as she’d seen him take the ice tonight. He’d stood there during warmups, so mean and forbidding, always adjusting his gloves. And she’d thought...

Life doesn’t happen on her timeline.

She’d found her people before she was ready, but if she didn’t seize this moment with them, there might not be another one. Her plan had been to surprise Burgess when he got home from Pittsburgh by coming back to live with him and Lissa. For good.

It’s still going to happen.

She wanted to be there with Burgess more than ever now. If seeing him in pain could rend her heart in two, something huge was there. Running from her feelings for this man wasn’t going to make them any less real.

The plane landed and she exhaled the breath she’d seemingly been holding the entire flight. There was a text from Chloe that contained the name of a hospital and a crying emoji, but Tallulah refused to dwell on emoji choices, ordering an Uber, instead, and throwing herself into the back of it, carry-on bag clutched in her arms.

Thirty minutes later, she walked down a squeaky, disinfectant-scented hallway toward Burgess’s hospital room. She’d been directed to the orthopedic surgery wing, and the word “surgery” pealed like a chorus of broken bells in her head. Okay. Surgery. If she’d stopped to think, she would have known that course had to be taken. It was inevitable. But the road to recovery after any surgery was hard. Painful. Frustrating.

If anyone could get through it, though, Burgess could.

He was strong, powerful, resilient. A giant.

“My giant,” she whispered, pausing at the sight of five men in suits outside of his room, all of them wearing grim expressions, some of them speaking into phones. They were likely from the Bearcats, relaying news to the powers that be, the media. None of that mattered to her, however. She was only there for the man.

Tallulah coughed into her fist as she approached the gathering of suits, gesturing to the door. “Hi, I’m Tallulah... Burgess’s...”

A couple of them stared at her blankly, waiting for her to continue, but one of the men stepped up and extended his hand. The trainer. She recognized him from the game she’d attended. “Hey. Good to see you again, Tallulah, even if the circumstances aren’t great.”

“Good to see you again, too,” she said, her throat dry as a Saltine. “Is he... up?”

Something that could only be described as ominous traveled across his expression. “Yeah, he’s up. They’re prepping him for surgery.”

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