Page 63 of In Full Bloom

“Sounds like they started spectacularly, if you ask me,” Olivia says with a giggle. “It was after that they got worse. But I’m assuming they’re better again now?” She waggles her eyebrows.

“Behave,” I say, playfully slapping her hand. Then I take a long breath. “We had an arrangement for one-night only. I once tried to suggest we change the arrangement so we could have a second night. He said he doesn’t want that.” I come to a stop, turning away from my best friend so I can’t see her studying me, analysing everything I’m saying. “He doesn’t want another night. He wants lots of nights, and days, and months and years.”

“That doesn’t surprise me,” Olivia says quietly.

“I don’t know that I can give him that,” I say, my voice as soft as hers. “You know I wasn’t planning on staying beyond getting us both some stability again. I don’t know that I can change my plans for a guy again. I don’t know that I can trust someone with that kind of power over me.”

Olivia wraps an arm around me and tugs me down so we’re sitting side by side in the grass, her arm around my shoulders. I snuggle into her.

“If you stayed, why would you be staying?”

“For Dallas.”

“Would it be? Just for him?”

“Yes?”

“You don’t sound convinced. What about for me, for Mum, for Flynn and Scout and Aurora and Sadie? What about foryou?”

I stare out over the farm. From here we can see the main farmhouse, Dallas’s cottage across the paddock from it, tucked away in some trees, the stables and barn, Scout and the other horses grazing in their paddock. We can see the rolling hills and the sheep in the distance. I know behind the far hill is the function centre—Olivia’s dream.

Before I left this place with Toby four years ago, I was certain this would be my home forever. Even after Toby passed away, I thought I’d come back here.

Until I did for his funeral and was struck down by memories, now stained with pain, and Max let his feelings be known.

“Don’t live your life for anyone else, Katie. Not for Dallas, or any of us, or for Toby or Max. You have to decide what you want to do, without any of our opinions.” Olivia tilts her head so it rests against my shoulder. “But for what it’s worth, every one of us wants you here, except for Max and since he’s a grade-A asshole we don’t give a shit about his opinion.”

I snort a laugh. “Wasn’t he your best friend for like, your whole life?”

“Yeah, when we were kids. Then he lost his shit over something, wouldn’t talk to me about it and instead became the bastard we all know and hate today.”

I laugh full out this time. “God, I love you,” I say, my voice cracking.

“I love you too. I’ll love you even more when you tell me more about Dallas.” She waggles her eyebrows at me. “The first decent new guy in town in years and you snap him up on your first day back. That’s so typical of you.”

The giggles over take us and we end up lying in the grass, tears running down our cheeks and bellies aching. “It wasn’t on purpose, I swear,” I manage to choke out between wheezing breaths.

“I know, but come on girl, give us the goooooods. What’s he like?”

I stretch out, enjoying the afternoon sun warming my face. I take a breath of spring air and release it slowly. “What’s he like? Fuck me …” I trail off, trying to think how to describe him.

“No, that’s what you need to say to him.” She’s off giggling again, howling at her own jokes, and despite my best efforts, I’m right there with her.

Eventually I sober, the giggles petering out. “He wants me to go see him tonight. To talk things through. He’s worried about Sadie.”

“But Sadie adores you.”

“Yeah, I don’t think me being in her life is what scares him. It’s what happens if I can’t stay in her life.”

“Oh … well, Sadie can sleep at ours tonight. Give you guys the space you need to ah, clear the air.”

I give her a shove. By the time we finish cackling this time, the sun is beginning to drop behind the hills.

“Come on, Katie Kat,” Olivia says, helping me to my feet. “Time for you to go get your man.”

28

DALLAS

---