He managed to get safely inside Frank’s house without further incident. First of all he’d have a coffee to sober up. Then he’d get cleaned up and go round to finish that last patch of allotment. He wasn’t really in a fit state to do it but it felt important that he finished it off himself. And Ursula might be there. She might even talk to him if she saw him doing something good.
He made the coffee and drank it so quickly he nearly scalded his throat. He tipped back a glass of water, but his thirst seemed to know no ends and his need for more coffee became desperate.
He heard the front door reopening and Liza appeared in the hallway, her eyes blazing. ‘Dad, what the fuck? We’ve been searching everywhere for you. We looked all over the place yesterday and people are still out looking this morning. Where have you been?’
‘Here and there. I needed some space.’
‘To do what exactly? Drink yourself stupid and get into fights?’
‘I haven’t been in any fights.’ Not as far as he could remember anyway.
‘So what are those new marks on your face?’
He touched the fresh bumps and scratches. He was sure he’d remember if he’d had a fight. There was blood on his fingers. Of course. It was his emergency escape from Adam and Jude’s. ‘I got caught up in a bush with sharp thorns.’
He held out his arms to her and she came closer then stopped and covered her nose and mouth. ‘Oh my God, you stink so much.’
‘Oh, you don’t like my new image?’ It was good that he was making light of it. It was important to retain a sense of humour.
She moved to the other side of the kitchen. ‘I don’t know what’s going on with you, but it’s gone far enough.’
‘I’m just going through a hard time, darling. I’ll be all right soon.’
‘I’m not talking about all of this.’ She waved her hands at him. ‘I’m talking about the things you said to that lady at the allotment. Ursula.’
‘Ursula? What has she said?’
‘Enough.’
‘It’s not true.’
Liza tutted. ‘That’s you all over isn’t it, Dad? You don’t even know what she said and you’re already denying it.’
‘No, you’ve got the wrong end of the stick, darling. I tried to tell her about the things that happened between your mum and me but she didn’t understand.’
‘Okay, so what did you tell her?’
‘I said I’d done bad things. I tried to explain the extenuating circumstances.’
‘Wait. Extenuating circumstances? What are you talking about?’
‘Your mum and Chambers. Their affair.’
Liza walked away. For a minute, Colin thought she was leaving but then she came back. ‘Nothing, I repeat, nothing that mum and Doogie did excused the way you treated her. Or us.’
‘Us?’
‘Yes, us. Me and Will. You used us to get to her. You forced us to take sides.’
‘No, darling, no. I asked your mum to leave because she’d broken us up. We talked about it, the three of us. We agreed. You were just a kid. You’re misremembering.’
Liza ran at him and pushed him. The shock and the force of it sent Colin reeling backwards. ‘Will you listen to yourself? You didn’t ask her to leave, you ordered her to. In the middle of a crowded fucking restaurant. And then you made out that we all wanted it. You hadn’t even told us but you made us choose between you and her.’
No she was wrong. She was wrong. She was missing the point. ‘All right, yes I did tell her to go, but I did it for us. For you, me and Will.’
She shook her head slowly. ‘You did it so you could move Arianne in. You did it for yourself. We were just the excuse you pretended to have. All that money you stole from Mum? You stole it for yourself. And don’t pretend it wasn’t theft. It doesn’t matter which way you try to fake news it, you took money from her that wasn’t yours to take. I don’t blame Will for despising you.’
‘He, he despises me?’