Page 51 of Not My Finest Hour

Maybe itwoulddo me some good to talk with our mother. I could use some motherly advice since this is new and very scary territory for me. Maybe she could help quell some of my fears.

Fern pulls into the parking lot at Snoqualmie Falls which is very empty for a weekend day. Although, the lack of people isn’t all that surprising since we’re not in tourist season. The dark gray clouds are thick and hanging low in the sky, threatening to rain on us any minute. I slip my jacket on, and Fern does the same, and we walk across the pedestrian bridge to get to where the falls are. It’s chilly out, so my hood is up and my hands are stuffed in my pockets.

Once we get to the viewing point for the falls, the massive surge of water coming down the rock face is awe-inspiring. In constant motion, the murky brown water from the Snoqualmie River swirls and churns before crashing down onto the boulders below. It’s much louder than I would’ve expected from where we’re standing, and all I can hear around me is a constant white noise. A fine mist blows in our direction and covers us.

“Isn’t this amazing?” Fern yells, loud enough to be heard over the noise. She’s got a goofy grin plastered on her face, her expression like that of a child who can’t believe their eyes.

I nod, agreeing with her assessment of the waterfall. “I can’t believe I haven’t been here more. This is practically in our backyard.”

We stand, staring at the falls, mesmerized by its beauty, until Fern taps my arm and points to the other viewpoints. I follow her lead, and we visit the other viewpoints, enjoying the falls from different angles. Along the way, we learn about the history of Snoqualmie Falls, what the hydroelectric power that’s generated is used for, and see some of the old equipment that’s on display. The gift shop on the grounds is open, and we can’t resist stepping inside to take a peek. There are a few baby items that Fern and I look at, the usual touristy trinkets, and some local jams and jellies. While I wasn’t really looking to buy anything, there’s a candle that has a very soothing lavender scent that I can’t resist. Fern is nice enough to purchase it for me because, as she says, “You need to save your money for the baby.”

On our walk back to the car, the skies that had been threatening rain all day finally let loose and provide us with a heavy rain.

“It’s a good thing we left when we did,” I say.

“Agreed. The mist from the falls got us wet enough. We didn’t need to add to it with the pouring rain.”

Before we leave the parking lot, we do a quick Internet search for places to eat near us. We find a no-frills bar and grill in North Bend that sounds good and has good reviews. It takes us about ten minutes to get there, and even less time to walk in and get seated at a table.

Around us is a lumberjack-esque interior. It looks like a log cabin in here, and there are some deer antlers hanging on the wall that could be real or fake. I can’t tell from here, not that I’d be able to tell the difference anyway. A few axes are affixed to the wall, and pictures of burly men chopping trees are scattered throughout.

I flip through the menu, which consists of very American food, and settle on the fish and chips. Unhealthy, fried food is speaking to me right now. Maybe that’s pregnancy cravings kicking in already, or maybe I want to drown my sorrows in fried food since my day didn’t turn out as planned. But spending the day with my sister hasn’t been bad. Other than a few unnecessary comments, we’ve actually had a good time.

When our food gets delivered, Fern lets me get in a few bites before starting with her questions.

“Would you mind sharing with me what some of your concerns are?”

“Concerns about what? You need to be more specific,” I say.

“What are some of your concerns about having a baby? And what concerns do you have about your relationship with Justin?”

“How are you going to help me with my concerns about having a baby? Do you have experience? Do you have some secret child somewhere that no one knows about?”

Fern narrows her eyes. “You know I don’t. I’m just trying to be nice.”

“I guess my concerns about having a baby are the same as anyone who’s ever had a baby for the first time. So much is going to change, and I feel like I’m not prepared for it.”

“You have a pretty vast support network who would love to help you out whenever you need it. And you know Mom will babysit for you as often as you need. All you have to do is ask,” she says, then takes a sip of her soda.

“I know, but I’ve never met Justin’s family. Will they like me? And what will they think of him and I having this baby?” I can’t imagine what my first meeting with his mom and stepdad is going to look like. Is it going to be all, “Hey, Mom. This is my girlfriend, Dahlia. She’s carrying my baby.”

“I’m sure they’ll love you. And if they don’t, just remember that you don’t have to have a relationship with someone who doesn’t respect you. And what about your other concerns? What are your concerns about your relationship with Justin?”

“I feel like our relationship is still so new. Can it survive the birth of a child?” Our relationship feels very insta-love though that’s not really the case. Even when we were apart and I was seeing Wesley, he never left my mind.

“Relationships take work no matter how long you’ve been together. Couples that have been together for decades still have to work at it. Things aren’t always sunshine and roses with me and Brett, but we love each other. And it’s our love that carries us through. Do you love Justin?”

“I do.” But is it enough?

ChapterNineteen

“You made it,” I say, opening the door for Justin.

“I told you I’d be here,” he says, stepping into the living room.

I refrain from pointing out the other times he let me down by telling me he’d be here and then bailing at the last minute. I told myself I wouldn’t make things harder for him, and I won’t. Although, I must admit that I was half expecting him to cancel on me tonight because that’s the way our dates have been lately. But I’m pleased to see him here, and I intend on enjoying this evening with him to the fullest.

He steps across the threshold and leans down, pressing his lips to mine. He cups my chin in his hand, tilting my head toward his, deepening the kiss. Any irritation I had about missed dates and canceled plans melts away. Slowly, he pulls away, giving me one last tender kiss before opening his eyes.

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