Page 96 of Playboy For Hire

I said nothing. I still couldn’t figure out why he was here. After a moment, he continued.

“Anyway, I wanted to talk to you, so I thought I’d wait a bit, see if you came back.”

I frowned. “Why didn’t you just text me? Or call?”

Brandon smiled and shrugged. “Can you blame me for wanting to see you in person? I miss you, Quinn. I really do.”

He was as handsome as ever, his shoulders practically bursting out of his suit, a three-day beard on his chin, his eyes dark and penetrating. I could see why I’d fallen for him.

But looking at him now, I felt nothing. It barely even hurt, which was wild. But I guess Ryder had taken care of that. I only had room for one heartbreak at a time.

“Why?” I asked. It came out flat, more an accusation than a question.

“Oh come on.” Brandon’s smile was playful. “I know you’ve got some self-esteem issues, but is it so hard to believe I could missa guy I spent some amazing days with?” He walked forward, stopping right in front of me, and lowered his voice. “Some amazing nights too.”

“What?” I jumped backwards like I’d been shocked.

“Oh, don’t act so innocent,” he teased. “I know you liked them as much as I did.”

“Brandon, that’s—” I shook my head. “That’s a weird thing to say to someone, when you’re engaged to their cousin.”

“Engaged,” he agreed. “”But that doesn’t mean I’ve become a monk. Julie’s great. She’s going to be a wonderful mom, and a perfect wife. But I can’t help it if I have needs she can’t meet.” He glanced over his shoulder in both directions, then took my hand. “But you could.”

I felt sick to my stomach. I’d been devastated when Brandon ended things. Felt even worse when I found out he was dating Julie. And yeah, I’d wished for months that Brandon would change his mind, tell me he wanted me back.

But I’d never wanted it like this.

“No.” I pulled my hand free, stepping back again. “No, I can’t.”

“Oh, come on, Quinn. You can’t pretend with me. I already know you want me.”

“No.” Anger rose within me. “No, you don’t know that. You know I think you’re attractive. Physically. But not emotionally. In fact, the more I get to know the real you, the less I want you.”

“Quinn.” His tone was indulgent.

“No.” I stepped around him and hurried to the steps of my building. “Just, no, Brandon. I’m not interested.”

“Not even if I told you I was free right now? That I could come upstairs, right back in your bed, and make you—”

“Fuck off.” It came out louder than I’d meant it to, but I didn’t care. A wave of disgust rolled through me. “God, I used to fantasize about this, you know? I used to dream about you coming back and telling me you needed me.”

“And I do.”

“But Idon’t.”

It was true. Over the past few months, I’d gone from mourning the loss of Brandon to having no real use for him anymore. Ryder had changed all that. And not just because I’d fallen for him.

Ryder had made me feel like I deserved better than being someone’s hidden hookup. Ryder had made me think I might actually be worth something. Even if he didn’t want me himself, he’d given me that gift. I wasn’t content with scraps of love anymore. I wanted the real thing.

“Look, if this is about Julie, she doesn’t have to know,” Brandon said. “That’s why I didn’t text you. As long as we keep things off my phone, it’ll be fine.”

“Forget Julie. Even if she weren’t in the picture, I wouldn’t want you because I don’t want to be your secret. I don’t want to be anyone’s secret, or second choice, or good-enough-for-now.”

“Quinn, come on. There are reasons I can’t come out.”

“And that’s fine. Whatever. It’s your life, live it how you want. But you’re not going to get me involved in any of it.”

“Quinn.”

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