Page 45 of Baby Maker

“Calliope, I’m crazy about you, and you know it.”

Talk about a tingle fest. It’s not a declaration of love, but judging by the heated look on his face, it’s not far off. “You’re drunk, Keegan.”

“I know. But it doesn’t change what I said.” His fingers push the hair from my face, his palm caressing my cheek. “I’m in love with you, Calli. I know that wasn’t part of the deal, but it happened, anyway.”

My heart hammers against my ribcage at his admission. I expected any number of things to come out of his mouth. A declaration of love wasn’t one of them. “I-I—”

“The idea terrifies me. Likely why I had to wait until I was drunk to tell you.” He clears his throat, the apprehension rampant on his face.

“You’re terrified to love me?”

“I’m terrified that you won’t love me back.” Keegan searches my face, but I’m frozen. Do I feel something for him? God, yes. Is it love? Likely. Am I lying when I claim it might not be love? Definitely.

But the man is drunk. People say things all the time when they’re drunk. Things they don’t mean. He walked away from me once. Ran is more like it. My heart can’t handle him taking this back, too, under the guise of too much alcohol.

So, I play the only card I have at the moment. Levity and dry wit. “Is this your way of getting into my knickers?”

I’m not sure what I expected as a response, but the hurt crossing Keegan’s face is palpable. “Hmm. For the first time in my life, I let my feelings go. I even admit them out loud. Stupidly, I now see. Because you think it’s an excuse to sleep with you.”

“No, Keegan, that’s not how I meant it.” Christ, I only tried to lighten the mood, avoid hurting my heart. In the process, I hurt him.

He rolls onto his back, tucking his hand behind his head. “I knew you didn’t feel the same way, but I thought earlier… I thought it meant something. Guess you were just playing your part, right?”

“Not at all. I really wanted you to stay tonight. Skip the strip club and be with me.”

“Get into your knickers, huh?” He shakes his head before rising from the bed and throwing on his pants.

“Where are you going?”

“Hotel bar is open for another hour. I’m going to take advantage.”

“Would you like me to come?”

His gaze holds mine, his eyes brimming with hurt. Hurt I caused. “Actually, I’d rather go solo if it’s all the same to you.”

“Of course. Be careful?”

He throws on a t-shirt, tousling his dark hair with his fingers. “You know it.” He pauses at the door, tapping the frame with his fingers. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re here. I hope you have fun this weekend.”

I rise from the bed, determined to stop this conversation train before it careens into darker territory. “Please, come back to bed.”

“I can’t, Calli. Not after what I said… and what you didn’t. I shouldn’t have said anything. Blame it on the booze. I won’t mention it again. Sleep well.”

Then he’s gone, and it takes everything in me not to run after him. Beg him back. Beg him to love me like he claims.

But I’m not that brave. Keegan is gorgeous and brilliant and doesn’t want any sort of commitment. I’d be a fool to get my heart involved any deeper.

Still, I’d rather be a fool than lonely. When I’m with Keegan, the loneliness vanishes.

Why couldn’t I keep my mouth shut? Better yet, why couldn’t I find the courage to say what I truly feel?

He claims I don’t feel the same way about him.

The trouble is, I know I do.

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