Page 60 of Wishes for August

“My head hurts but I’m okay.” He hummed a reply before getting up and placing his plate in the sink. He left the kitchen and I heard his footsteps head back upstairs. I followed behind moments later, like a lost puppy, through to his bedroom where I found him sitting on the edge of the bed with his head between his hands.

I gingerly sat down next to him. “I’m sorry,” I said but he didn’t look up. “I was a coward. I pushed you away because it felt safer than waiting for you to leave me.”

He looked at me then, his lashes wet, his eyes shining with unshed tears.

“How many times do I have to tell you, I wouldn’t have left you. I told you, you were it for me. And I meant it. I have never lied to you, August. But you didn’t trust me. You didn’t even give me a chance! You just pushed me away at the first hurdle.”

“I know. I should have trusted you.” I swallowed back the sob in my throat when I asked, my voice a low whisper, “Can we fix this? Please?”

When he didn't answer, I stood up and moved between his legs, kneeling down to rest my hands on his knees. He looked at me with a mix of pain and longing.

“If Branson hadn’t called me last night, would you have ever talked to me again? Or were you perfectly happy with me in your rear view?” His tone was cold and I flinched. I deserved his anger. I reached my hand up to brush against his cheek. His beard had grown out a bit since I had last seen him and the hair felt rough on my palm. I shook my head.

“You’re right Caleb. I was scared that history would repeat itself and I’d once again be left behind. The irony is that by pushing you away I ended up alone by my own doing. I am miserable without you.”

I knew I loved him but, in that moment, I was so certain of it, I could have burst trying to hold it in. I thought falling in love would scare me, and for a time it did, but loving him was the surest thing I had ever felt. I felt it with a fierceness I didn’t know my fragile heart could muster and I needed him to know.

“I love you.”

Caleb looked at me, his eyes wide, his lips parted.

“I love you,” I said it again as I stood up and pushed him backwards onto the bed, climbing up to straddle his waist. “I think I have for a very long time now. When I'm with you I feel whole and like no sadness or loneliness could ever touch me again. I'm sorry for how I reacted before. Please forgive me and let me love you?”

I leaned down slowly to kiss him, worried that he would reject me, and sighed in relief when he pushed up on his elbows and met me, pressing his lips against mine in a slow, sensual kiss.

“You love me?” he whispered, our foreheads together as I nodded.

“I do, I love you so fucking much. And I’m all in, no matter what that looks like for us, for our family. I love you.”

Caleb reached for the waistband of my sweatpants and started pulling them down over my ass.

“Then show me.” I pulled back and looked at him, his pupils were blown, his eyes dark, and there was a hint of that smile I loved so much tipping up the corners of his mouth.

I licked my lips then leaned down and sucked the side of his neck until he hissed from the sting and I looked at my handiwork, happy to see a purple mark blossoming under the skin. I placed gentle kisses along his neck, his clavicle and down his perfectly chiselled chest. I pulled his nipple into my mouth and sucked it before biting it enough to have him whimpering and moaning.

“I’ve missed your lips on me.” His voice was raspy, and he bucked his hips upward to find mine. I continued kissing down his chest, over his stomach and then dragged my tongue along the width of his waistband. Slowly, I pulled down his sweats and I groaned when his hard cock popped out. It was wet at the tip and so inviting, my mouth watered. But I was taking it slow, treasuring each and every inch of him. I licked over his balls and down his taint, pushing his knees up so I could see his pretty pink hole. I moved back to his balls, sucking one into my mouth while my finger circled his entrance, rubbing gently over the puckered skin. His balls were wet with my saliva and it ran down between his crease. Using the wetness, I pressed one finger inside him and he pushed back, trying to fuck himself on me.

I playfully smacked the side of his thigh. “Slow down baby, I’m making love to you, remember?”

He huffed. “Just fuck me already, please.”

I chuckled at his neediness but didn’t give in. Shooting back up his body, I silenced his complaining with a hungry kiss, rubbing my covered cock against his.

“I love you, I love you," I said, kissing him over and over so he wouldn’t ever forget it. I didn’t care that he hadn’t said it back yet. I felt it every time he looked at me. Kissing him one last time, I stood up and pulled off my trousers. His eyes followed my every movement and I watched hungrily as he took his own length in his hand and stroked it.

“You are so gorgeous,” I said as I moved to climb back over him. Caleb took me by surprise when he stopped me with a hand on my chest.

“Do we need a condom?” he asked quietly, and my stomach twisted though I didn’t blame him for asking.

“No.” I spread his legs and sat between them, rubbing my hands up and down his thighs. “There’s been no one else Caleb. I promise you that.”

He hesitated a second before he asked, “And that guy last night?” Guilt washed over me, and I saw a glint of jealousy in his gaze.

“He kissed me, but I pushed him away. I wouldn’t have done anything with him. I only want you.”

He nodded then, and sat up, reaching to place both hands behind my neck before he kissed me, biting my bottom lip and uttering into my mouth, “Mine, only mine.”

“Always baby. Only yours.”

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