Page 117 of Dear Mr. Brody

I’m crazy about you.

I sucked in a breath remembering the words he’d told me the night he’d given himself to me. He wanted me here.

I got out of the car, wiping my hands on my jeans as I stepped up onto the porch. Knocking twice, I waited, my stomach twisting and turning until he opened the door, until he smiled at me softly, until he tilted his head and said, “Hi.”

“You didn’t call.”

His throat bobbed, his grip on the door handle tightening as he spoke. “I was about to.”

“Oh.” I wet my lips. “I was worried about… everything.”

He stepped outside and closed the door. “Park…” Running a hand through his hair, he said, “Vivian didn’t see you. At least, I don’t think she did.”

I exhaled the breath I’d been holding since I walked out of that fucking aquarium. “That’s good?”

He didn’t speak right away, and I swore I could hear the wheels turning inside his head. “That’s how it would be for us, Parker. Every damn time. The college policy is clear cut. We aren’t supposed to be together, and if I take this job—”

“Van, stop.”

“Let me finish what I want to say.” The irritation in his voice was unexpected.

“I’m sorry.”

He pushed his fingers through his hair again. “I can’t have both. I can’t have you and work at Winchester.”

“Why?”

“You know why.”

“I don’t care about hiding. I can handle it.”

“You shouldn’t have to handle it,” he said, throwing up his hands. “I can’t have both. If I stay at WSC, I can’t see another way around it. We’ll both end up getting hurt.”

“I’m twenty-four years old, I think I can decide for myself what’s best for me. You have to stop worrying about me.”

“I never meant for any of this to happen. I never meant to fall for you.” He blinked a few times, and my heart was on fire. “If I had known who you were when I met you online, I would have never pursued this, and maybe I should have walked away. But getting to know you… being with you has been one of the best things to ever happen to me.”

I took a step toward him, and when he didn’t back away, I closed the distance. My fingers clutched the sides of his sweater. “I care about you. About us. About Anne. My past… hiding… it isn’t an issue. What we have, it’s not like anything I’ve had before. Take the job, Van. I don’t need you to protect me. It’s my life.”

“Your life is my life too.” He raised his voice, and I dropped my hands as he stepped away from me. “And I won’t let you do that, I won’t let you hide again, not for me. It’s not fair to either of us.”

“Daddy.” Anne stared at her father, the door barely cracked open. “Why are you yelling?”

“I…” He closed his eyes for a brief second, trembling as he exhaled. “It’s nothing, sweetheart. I’ll be inside in a second.”

Her eyes bounced between the both of us. “But I thought Parker was having cake too.”

“Anne… go inside, alright? Give me a few minutes.”

It was the sharpest I’d ever heard him speak to her.

She shut the door, and the stillness that descended was unbearable.

Your life is my life too.

“Van…” The ache in my throat tried to render me silent. “If this is about you losing your job, losing a chance at what you’ve always wanted, regardless of how I feel, I’ll walk away. I’d never take that from you. But if you turn that job down, to protect me, then you’re an idiot. I don’t need you to sacrifice this job for me. I just need you. I know what I want, and it’s you. I’m not ready to let you go.”

His gray eyes were silver, shining under the moonlight as he stared at me. “And I can’t ask you to sacrifice two years of your life for me.”

---