Page 90 of Dear Mr. Brody

It was possible.

I was also delusional.

“Don’t worry, Dad,” she said, keeping her eyes on her new pet. “I think it’s cool.”

“What’s cool?” I asked, my voice failing me as I swallowed.

“Parker… he’s your boyfriend.”

“Anne...”

She lowered the bag, her smile quiet. “Mr. Adair at school has a husband. He came to class to talk to us about what it was like to be a firefighter.”

“Oh.”

“It’s okay. I kind of already figured it out,” she said.

“You did?”

“I’m ten, almost eleven. I notice things.”

Smiling, I rubbed the back of my neck. “You notice things?”

“You look at him like you used to look at Mom.” Her smile dimmed enough I noticed. “You’re happier.”

“Hey… your mom made me happy for a long time, but—”

“I know… I’m not mad or anything.” She gave me her elephant to hold and took my hand in hers. “Do you love him?”

“I like him a whole bunch.”

“He’s pretty cool…” She turned, her gaze scanning the festival, the lights glimmering in her gray eyes. “Do you think he’ll be sad if we don’t go on the Ferris wheel? I’m afraid of heights.”

“We can skip it, then.” I tugged on her hand. “Let’s find Parker and maybe we can do the tilt-o-whirl again.”

“No way, you guys squished me last time.”

“But wouldn’t it be funny to see Parker turn green again?”

A conspiratorial smile pulled her cheeks into dimples.

“Yeah… totally worth it.”

We made our way through the crowd, my head spinning a mile a minute. I hadn’t meant to come out to my daughter like this. I’d had this vision in my head where I would sit across from her at the kitchen table. We’d have waffles. I’d tell her and Lanie at the same time. Answer any questions as honestly as I was able. But I think the way it happened tonight was better. This wasn’t about Lanie and me anymore. Anne and I, we were our own little unit. Her acceptance was all I wanted.

We found Parker sitting on a bench people watching, a small carton of fries in his hand. He’d rolled his sleeves to his elbows, and the slight breeze ruffled his hair. It was longer now, in need of a trim, but I liked it. In an overcrowded park, in a sea of people, he stood out like a beacon. I couldn’t stop myself from smiling.

“I’m glad he makes you happy,” Anne said, beaming up at me. “I missed your smiles.”

I reached down and gently pinched her dimple. “I smile all the time.”

“Not like this.” She glanced over at Parker who’d caught sight of us. He stood and headed our way, throwing the rest of his fries in the trash can. “Can I tell Mom?”

“I’d like to be the one to tell her, if that’s okay.”

She hooked her pinky with mine. “She won’t be mad.”

“You don’t think so?”