Page 99 of Fear No Evil

She scoffed. “You don’t know how I spend my free time.”

He loved how easily he could provoke her. “Yeah, but I know you. Tell me I’m right. You never cook for yourself.”

She tsked her tongue. “Fine, I never cook for myself, but I could still learn.”

“Well, lucky for you, I can MacGyver any delicious meal with the barest of ingredients.”

“Of course you can.” The words were sarcastic, but her tone was admiring. “What else have you mastered as an adult?”

“Eh, besides French and Spanish, not much more than how to protect myself and kill bad guys.”

“Well, you know, there’s a need for people like you.” The wistfulness in her tone suggested she was jealous of the Teams for having such a claim on him.

As if to prove that fact, a brisk knock sounded at his door. “Hold on a sec.” Jake covered the mouthpiece on his desk phone as Senior Chief McLeod edged his door farther open. “Yes, Senior?”

Icy gray eyes conveyed McLeod’s current displeasure with him. “The CO wants to see you in his office right away.”

“Thank you. I’ll be right there.” Water off a duck’s back. Jake didn’t care how peeved his superiors were at him at the moment. Once Amos vanished, Jake growled his frustration. “I’m sorry, Beautiful, but I have to go.” The time was soon coming whenhe wouldn’t have to jump every time his commander summoned him. “I’ll try calling you tonight. If you can’t answer, look for my texts. Can’t wait to see you.”

“Can’t wait to see you either.”

There it was again, that peculiar thread running through her voice telling him something was up. Too bad he didn’t have time to find out what. “I love you, Lena.”

“I love you too, Jake.”

He savored the words, aware that this was the first time‍—ever‍—that she’d admitted to her feelings. With a smile of true contentment, he added, “Bye, Beautiful” and ended the call.

In her bedroom on Friday morning, Maggie donned a different outfit than the one she’d worn to the clandestine CIA offices in New York City earlier that month. For one thing, that dress didn’t fit her right as she was still twelve pounds underweight. For another, this bright-purple pantsuit with its lightweight, breathable fabric represented freedom and change. Wasn’t purple the color of reincarnation? But some things never changed, like the emerald ring gracing Maggie’s left hand, a reminder of why she was doing this.

It still felt unreal, being back in Arlington, and not slogging through mud on El Castillo. Despite how unpleasant so much of that assignment had been, it had felt so real that she still woke up in the middle of the night expecting to be there, sleeping with her head on Jake’s chest.

Being apart from him now, even in this safe apartment, surrounded by artwork and artisanry that reminded her of her assignments to Colombia, Venezuela, and Morocco, she feltadrift, aimless, ungrounded. Her body was back in the States, but her thoughts were still with Jake on El Castillo.

If only she didn’t have to give up her career to spend her future with him. But she did. Even then, his job as a SEAL and a SOG would pull him away, sending him into dangerous situations that would keep her on edge until his return. But at least they’d be together sometimes‍—versusnever, if she stayed in the CIA.

Slipping amethyst earrings through the holes in her ears, Maggie contemplated her reflection.I’ll be fine. I’ll find something else to do. What she didn’t want to do was spend more time apart from Jake. They’d lost twelve years as it was.

Plus, he was coming up to Northern Virginia tomorrow to see her. What better way to display her commitment to their future than by telling him she was all his? She would be Mrs. Jake Carrigan for the rest of their lives, if Jake still wanted that. She knew in her heart he did.

She had to admit, regarding her appearance in the full-length mirror, that despite being underweight, she looked better‍—less overwrought. The taut expression that had been on her face since Morocco was gone, replaced by a little smile that came from having the hope of Jake in her life, not to mention a meaningful relationship with God, who had whispered to her spirit on El Castillo, who’d kept Jake from dying and brought her safely home. She had been a fool for thinking she could handle whatever life dished out to her.

Nodding at her reflection, Maggie turned from the mirror to slip into a pair of comfortable white sandals. No point in bringing her Ruger along, since she couldn’t take it through the gate into Langley anyway. She left it in her bedside drawer without a second thought and strode out of her bedroom, through her well-appointed deluxe, high-rise apartment to the hall tree by the door. Miles and McKenzie were away at work‍—Miles at FBI headquarters, where he basically answered to their father. And McKenzie was painting another of her beautiful murals in someone’s home today. Neither one of them‍—and especially not her father‍—knew what Maggie was up to today, aside from driving to CIA Headquarters to be debriefed on her last assignment.

After today, her world would never be the same.

Twelve minutes later, Maggie guided her blue Lexus SUV along the George Washington Memorial Parkway. In August, the forest was nearly as lushly green as El Castillo. Exiting into the CIA complex, she slowed at the gate to show her CAC card to be admitted.

What a relief not to be reporting to the office job she loathed! Even so, uncertainty knotted her stomach as she drove through the raised gate and over the directional spikes. Her palms felt damp. Gordon wouldn’t like what she had to tell him after her debriefing. He might even try to talk her out of resigning, in which case, she would have to dig deep for the will to turn her back on everything she’d worked for, everything she’d ever known.

Shelving her doubts, she pictured Jake’s face when she told him they didn’t have to be apart anymore. He would be dumbfounded by her sacrifice, then grateful, maybe even humbled. She didn’t want to dwell on howshewould be feeling.

Finding a lucky spot in the shade in the front parking lot, Maggie made her way toward the original CIA building, where Gordon had his office. Most employees parked in the side parking lot, which gave access to the new building at the back of the complex. But Gordon, being a stickler for tradition, preferred to work in the original building.

The grand portico with its many columns never failed to stir Maggie’s pride, followed by a sense of honor as she swiped her CAC card and stepped into the lobby, where her steps lagged.

The granite CIA seal, a mosaic on the lobby floor, measured sixteen feet across, catching Maggie’s eye every time she went by it. How many times had she walked around it, finding it disrespectful somehow to walk right over it? As she followed its curved edge, her gaze alighted on the eagle’s head, the shield, and the sixteen-point compass star.

Her steps slowed as her thoughts flashed to the moment she and Jake had stepped onto the ridge of El Castillo,giving her a sudden sense of vertigo followed by awe at the immensity of the heavens. The sequin-like stars pulsing in the sky were just like this one. They meant the same thing, though she wasn’t sure what‍—something to do with honor, struggle, sacrifice.

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