Page 66 of The Redemption of Remy St. Claire

“We’re filing for full and permanent custody.”

“And I bet you think your marriage will help sway things in your favor.” He said the words casually.

She was on high alert. “Did that cross my mind? I’d be lying if I said anything to the contrary. Did I marry Rusty just so he could secure Mira’s custody? No.”

Zach arched his eyebrow, but didn’t respond.

She squirmed under the scrutiny. Her boss possessed an uncanny ability to read her. Well, not just her. He could read lots of people, which was why he excelled at his job.

Finally, he broke the silence. “You have my support, Remy, you always have. I trust you know what you’re doing.” He pointed to the pile of files in her inbox. “And I think you’ve got enough work to keep you busy. I’ll leave you to it, but I want to talk to you about Henrikson. Let’s plan to do it after lunch.”

She nodded, already sifting through the pile on her desk.

She barely noticed Zach leave.

Things continued on that way, but Remy’s vigilance never lifted. Less than a week later, she was at Healing Horses Ranch with her family.

“What’s the verdict?”

Dr. Kennedy Dixon was reputed to be one of the best psychologists in the area, and her team included members experienced in the treatment of children. The family’d spent two hours doing various things, all meant to allow the clinical staff to observe and assess Calleigh’s behavior.

“There is no verdict.” Kennedy sat across from Remy at her desk, papers spread across the surface. “We’re simply here to evaluate Calleigh.”

“It’s the lawyer in me. I want something definitive.” And she did. She didn’t want prevarication or hesitation. She wanted answers. Wanted to know everything would be okay.

“And there are no certainties in psychology. What Icantell you is that Dr. Denise Lang is the best clinical child psychologist I know. She and I agree Calleigh is a bright young child. She’s thoughtful and considerate, taking well to strangers, but keeping an eye out for you. Developmentally, she appears to be right on target.”

“So I needn’t worry?”

Kennedy consulted her notes. “You said the nightmares have lessened, and she’s no longer wetting the bed. She seems to enjoy her new sister, Mira, but still makes reasonable demands for attention of her own. All these are normal for a three-and-a-half-year-old.”

She removed her reading glasses and met Remy’s gaze. Her brown eyes softened in understanding. “If Calleigh regresses or starts behaving inappropriately—angry outbursts, crying for no reason—then bring her back. Denise specializes in kids with childhood trauma. How is Calleigh with Rusty?”

Remy offered her first genuine smile. “He’s amazing with the girls. Infinite patience, never taking sides. Everything you’d want in a parent. From the beginning, Calleigh accepted him, and that scares me a bit. Will she forget my parents?”

“Memories can be tricky things. She’s young, and it’s hard to say what she will and won’t remember.” Kennedy tucked a lock of her chestnut-brown hair behind her ear. “Keep pictures of them around. Talk about them. Let Calleigh know it’s okay to share the memories. But that’s not what you’re asking, is it?”

Taken aback by the psychologist’s insight, Remy took a moment to collect herself. “Rusty and I are married now, and it’s awkward who calls whom what. He wondered if perhaps we can try Mommy and Daddy. Won’t it seem weird if the kids call me Remy all their lives? I’m not their mother.”

“Aren’t you? You’ve committed to being their nurturer and protector for the rest of your lives.”

She swallowed. Yes, she’d made a lifetime commitment. She wouldn’t stop being a mother because the girls turned eighteen, graduated from university, or got married. But to have someone else put it into words brought her up short. She wiped her clammy palms on her skirt.

“Take a breath. You’re still grieving—and it’s a lot to take in.”

“When will it end? When will I stop missing them so much it hurts? When will I stop expecting my mother to greet me at the front door?” Blinking, she ruthlessly pushed away the pain.

Kennedy, not fooled for a moment, offered an empathetic smile. “Believe it or not, the adage is true. Time does help. One day you’ll find you’ve moved on with your life. You’ll never forget them, Remy; they’re part of you. They’re part of Calleigh.”

“What do you suggest?”

“If you decide you want the girls to call you Mommy and Daddy, start by referring to each other as such. It’ll feel awkward at first, but give it time. One day you’ll realize you’ve developed into a family unit.”

Remy tried to smile but faltered. “You’re such an optimist, Kennedy. I don’t know if I can survive this.”

The psychologist collected all the papers and put them in a neat pile. She again met Remy’s gaze head-on. “I know you came here to talk about Calleigh, and we’ve done that. What’s really going on with you? Why all the doubts?”

Now or never. Because if she didn’t do it this instant, she’d lose her nerve forever.

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