Page 49 of The Ghost of You

“Liar.”

“So what’s up?”

“Well you know I haven’t talked to you in four months.”

“I work three jobs.”

“You can still pick up the phone when I call.”

I sigh. “I know Jess but every time you or Mom call all you try to do is convince me to come home.”

“And what’s so wrong with that?”

“You know why,” I say flatly.

“No, I don’t. Anna May, you ran out of this town like the devil was on your heels after Kyle died. You didn’t talk to anyone, didn’t give any of us an explanation. You ghosted us like we didn’t even matter.”

I groan. “I was there for three months after he died. I was heartbroken. He was the love of my life. He destroyed my heart.”

She cuts me off before I can continue. “You can’t blame him for dying, Anna. You can’t let your heartache eat you up over something that could have happened to any of us.”

My sister, just like everyone else, has no idea about the fight that made Kyle leave the house that night. “You don’t get it, Jessica.”

“You know what? I don’t. And I don’t think I ever will.” She pauses before she starts to speak loudly into the phone. “God, why do you have to be like this? I understand it hurts. It’s been seven years though for god’s sake. You need to move on. Jesus, Anna, you are almost thirty years old and you act like a teenager moping over her high school crush. We have all moved on. This whole town has. Even Kyle’s parents are happy. You need to learn to be too.”

“I am happy.”

“No, you aren’t.”

“I don’t need to move on with someone else, be in love with someone to be happy.”

She sighs. “No, you don’t but you won’t even come home. And don’t tell me it’s because it hurts too much. If you’ve moved on, it wouldn’t hurt as much to come home.”

“Is this why you called?” I ask harshly.

“No, but as per usual this is the same conversation we always seem to have.”

“Then what do you want?” I ask harshly.

“Why do I always feel like the older sibling?”

I ignore her question as I pull my phone away to see the time. When I put the phone back to my ear, I hear her complaining.

“—glad your maturity level has gone up.” She pauses. “Mom wants to know if you read her letter?”

I bite my lip as I start to get impatient and I know my tables probably are too. I walk down the street, starting to pace. “What letter?” I play coy.

“Oh common, Anna May, you know exactly what I am talking about.”

I start chewing on my fingernails, something I rarely ever do as I try to think of a clever answer to my sister. “I—ugh—haven’t checked my mail in a few days.”

“Bullshit. You are the most meticulous and OCD person I know.”

“Well—” I know I can’t tell her I burned it. Or maybe I should. Maybe if I stand up for myself, they will finally let me be. I turn around on the sidewalk making my way back to Jimmy’s when I run into a hard chest. “Oof.”

“What was that?” my sister asks.

I look up and see Mason as he squares my shoulders off, grocery bag in hand. “Hey Anna May.”

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