Page 4 of Twice in a Lifetime

I hated seeing it on her beautiful face, and I swore to myself at that very moment I would do everything in my power to take her shame away.

Chapter Three

Blythe

The mattress dipping a couple feet away yanked me awake in an instant. Such was the life of a mom. If it wasn’t my internal clock waking me up with the sun, it was the faintest noise or slightest movement.

I knew what I would see even before I flipped my eyelids open, and sure enough, the instant my vision cleared, I found myself staring into the sleepy-eyed, pillow-creased face of my four-year-old daughter, Ainsley, lying on the pillow beside mine.

I curved my lips into a tired grin. “Morning, baby girl.”

And just like I knew what I’d see as soon as I woke up, I also knew what was coming next.

“Mornin’ Mommy.” She smiled big, showcasing every one of her tiny white baby teeth. “My tummy said it wants waffles.”

Called it.

Of course it did. My little girl wanted waffles every morning. If she could, she would eat waffles for every single meal and never get tired of them.

I let out a low chuckle, the sound still raspy with sleep. “Your tummy said that, huh?”

Her head bobbed up and down as she blinked her big blue eyes at me. “Yuh-huh. It grumbled really loud. Like a monster.”

“Let me guess. It saidfeed me waffles?” I asked, adopting a low, growly monster voice and lifting my hands in front of my face and curling my fingers so they looked like claws.

My baby let out a giggle that filled my chest with warmth. It was nice to feel it, especially since that warmth had been lacking in recent months. It was hard enough to mourn the loss of Elliott, but the rage at the realization that he had been cheating piled on top of all that sorrow. I bounced between crying because I missed him to wishing he was still alive so I could yell and cuss him out and slap him across the face for betraying our marriage. Trying to keep his memory alive for my kids, smiling as they remembered the happy times with their father, was a knife to my heart, over and over again. But I couldn’t bring myself to tarnish him in their eyes. As far as I was concerned, they never needed to know.

I’d been keeping Elliott’s secrets to myself for months and they were starting to eat at my insides. It had gotten so bad it had driven me to Alpha Omega and to a blast from my past I hadn’t been prepared for.

I hadn’t been thrilled to reveal all my secrets to Rhodes, the first boy to break my heart—confessing that the last man I’d been with had shattered it all over again—but the need for answers kept me from bolting out of there.

To my surprise, by the time I finished telling Linc and Rhodes my story, I’d left their office feeling a bit lighter. It was nice no longer being the only one to carry the weight of my deceased husband’s infidelity.

I pushed up to sitting, shoving the tangled mop of my hair out my face. “Are you sure the monster in your belly didn’t say it wanted oatmeal?”

Her face pinched up like I’d just suggested we eat dog poo for breakfast. “No, Mommy,” she said with more seriousness than a little four-year-old should have been capable of. “It said waffles. I heard it.” Her Rs still came out sounding like Ws, making her solemnity that much more adorable.

Throwing the covers back, I climbed out of the bed and lifted my arms high, stretching the last of the sleep from my body. “Okay, chickadee. Let’s go see about taking care of that monster, huh?”

“Yay!” She sprang to her feet on my bed and hopped her way to the foot before launching herself off, barely giving me a second to brace to catch her. I let out anoofas I got my arms around her just in time. She’d hit another growth spurt recently—it seemed like she was hitting one every other week—and it was getting harder and harder to hold my baby girl. It was only a matter of time before she would be too heavy for me to hold, and I didn’t think there was anything I could do to prepare for that.

I propped her on my hip and brushed her fiery red mass of curls out of her face to press a kiss to her temple. That hair was something she’d gotten from my mother, along with her sassy personality. She also shared the same shade of turquois blue eyes as my mother and me. She looked like a miniature version of Nona Wanderly while my other daughter Adeline and my son, Avett, both had their father’s chestnut hair and velvety umber eyes.

I’d always loved that two of my babies shared their dad’s goldish brown eyes, but now every time I had a thought like that, a sour taste formed in my mouth and my stomach twisted up. I hated that all my happy thoughts of my husband felt tainted now. I could only hope that the pain would eventually fade andI’d be able to look back at those memories without feeling like I’d been kicked in the chest with a steel-toed boot. But for now, I’d continue to pretend for the sake of my kids.

I descended the stairs to the first floor with Ainsley still attached to my hip and headed for the kitchen, successfully skirting the gigantic running shoes scattered about and stepping over the dirty socks on the living room floor. We’d been crashing with my brother Tristan since moving back to Hope Valley, and he wasn’t the best at housekeeping. Fortunately, I was a pro at dodging all sorts of tripping hazards thanks to three kids who weren’t big on putting their stuff away. The only thing I couldn’t seem to avoid were Legos. Those tiny little bastards were created by Satan to torture parents. I was convinced they contained black magic and appeared out of thin air the second before you stepped down.

Tristan’s dog, Doc—named after his favorite movie character, Doc Holliday—lifted his head from his dog bed in the corner of the living room and gave me a tired blink before standing on his stumpy legs and stretching his oddly shaped body.

He was part pit bull and part English bulldog, the combination creating something... unique. Tristan had gotten him in the hopes of teaching him to be a guard dog, but the joke was on my little brother.

Doc looked like he should be ferocious, with his short, pointed ears, strong face, and stocky body, but he was an equal combination of lazy and pathetic that basically made him useless for anything other than cuddling. I hadn’t known it was possible for a dog to be so damn whiny. God forbid he stepped on something sharp or another dog barked at him. There was even one time when a bird swooped down in an effort to peck him. It didn’t, of course, but it got close. Doc made a sound like he was dying and collapsed on the ground, howling in agony until Tristan finally had to pick his heavy ass up.

He was utterly ridiculous and I loved him like crazy.

“Come on, Doc. Time to go potty.” He stared at me for a few seconds, blinking as if to sayit’s too damn early, womanbefore finally giving in and slowly meandering behind me and Ainsley toward the kitchen.

I plopped my girl down on one of the barstools at the island with some paper and a few crayons, undid the latch that locked the doggy door in the back door so Doc could do his business, then got to work on breakfast.

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