Page 64 of On Circus Lane

She taps the table thoughtfully. “So, let me get this straight. Tom showed you sanctuary stones and then took you on a tour of a graveyard looking for a non-existent gravestone?”

“Yeah.”

She shakes her head. “You’re fucking brilliant, Tom.”

“Yep,” I say proudly. “I think I can safely say that I add an element of fun to every occasion.” I wink at Bee. “Although I’m sure I can find some testimonials that say I’mparticularlygood on the occasions that don’t require clothes.”

“Or a viable brain cell,” Steven says acidly. “Shall we order now Tom and Bee havefinallygraced us with their presence?” He turns to Bee. “I need an early night because I have to be at my best for the conference tomorrow. It’s expected of me by now,” he finishes pompously.

As conversations begin around me, I turn and whisper to Freddy, “Steven’s self-importance seems to have dialled up to a dangerous level. What’s up with him?”

“Ah, he wanted to go to his conference early, but he decided not to when Jack said he was still going out with us.”

I blink. “Why is it always winter and never Christmas?”

Freddy sighs. “God forbid he leave Jack on his own. He might do what Steven’s already done.”

“You know Jack wouldn’t cheat,” I whisper.

“Steven obviously doesn’t because he’s like a fox guarding the henhouse at the moment.”

The waitress arrives, and I take a cursory glance at the menu and order prawn tacos with pineapple pico de gallo and amarillo mayo before turning my attention to my sister.

“Oi, Sal, do you remember that old film you used to watch?”

She blinks. “That might need narrowing down a bit.”

“Ivanhoe. It had the blond posh bloke you fancied for ages in it.”

She snaps her fingers. “Anthony Andrews.”

“That’s the one. What happened in the end?”

The last time I saw a stare like hers, it was on a basilisk in a film. “Why?” she finally says.

“Just thinking about it. Did it have a happy ending?”

“Well, he married Rowena.”

“Did he?” I say, disappointed. “Not Rebecca? She waswaybetter for him. That’s a bit of a boring end.”

“Hmm,” she says slowly. “And is there a particular reason you’re thinking about a film about a knight?” Her eyes narrow. “Achivalricknight.”

“No reason,” I say quickly. “All this culture must be catching.”

Bee looks delighted. “Really?”

Steven rolls his eyes. “He’d be more likely to catch syphilis than culture, Bee, don’t fool yourself.”

Bee puts his napkin down. His face is set and hard in a way I haven’t seen since the start of this holiday, back when he thought I was a twat.

He turns to address Steven. “Tom’s beenextremelykind to me, and he’s also incredibly knowledgeable about many things. I couldn’t have picked anyone better as a tour guide.” He smiles up at the waitress as she appears at the table with his mojito. “How lovely. Could you possibly bring me ten more and then just keep them coming?”

Ivy laughs, and the conversation picks up quickly as Steven glares impotently at Bee’s profile.

I take a moment to consider how Bee just stuck up for me. There was no real need. Steven couldn’t find my feelings if he had a map and compass, but Bee’s gesture was still extraordinarily nice. Like a prickly hedgehog just donned his suit and armour and rolled into battle on my behalf.

I look to my left and find Sal watching Bee as well. There’s approval and calculation in her eyes, so when she turns to me, I make sure to offer her a placid smile. That never fails to wind her up.

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