Page 46 of Next to You

Her eyes flew open in alarm, and I pulled her close to keep her from flying out of bed. “Crap, Spencer. My boobs are out.”

“No one can see—yet. Stay still.” My eyes darted to the window. My dad had turned his back so we could get dressed.

Lucy was right before. We needed some curtains for this damn place. At least he hadn’t come barging in. That would have been awkward.

I locked eyes with her as thoughts crashed through my brain, whirling and skidding around until only one remained.

I didn’t want to leave.

She was warm and so soft; she smelled like heaven, but the bottom line is that she belonged with me. I couldn’t see any other way to live the rest of my life unless she was in it.

What was I supposed to do?

What was so certain at midnight felt different in the light of day. Had we gone too far?

I couldn’t exactly propose marriage or ask her to move in with me when we’d spent less than a week together. She would think I was out of my mind, and maybe I was—out of my mind forher. Being with her was all I could think about.

“I guess we’d better get up,” she whispered without moving.

Then she got closer, sliding off my chest to her side, tangling her legs with mine, and burying her face in the side of my neck. She shuddered against me as she drew in a slow breath.

“Yeah.” Cradling her head in my hands, I kissed her temple. “I’ll get up first and bring you your clothes.”

“Thanks.” She took a deep breath and forced a smile on her face.

My heart was too big for my chest. It hurt to look at her. Not like last night when I was overwhelmed with anticipation and hope—this time, it hurt like I was losing her, which made no sense. I wasn’t losing her,was I?

I rubbed a circle over my sternum as I carefully slipped from beneath the covers and stood. The chill in the air matched the cold dread that filtered through my system at the thought of being away from her.

She watched me, eyes luminous and sad, shining in the sunlight filtering through the window.

The fire had died down as we slept, but I guess that was good since we’d be leaving soon.

I found her leggings and my hoodie on the floor and brought them to her. Each item I picked up was a reminder of how we’d stripped each other bare last night, and not just physically. I felt like we had an honest and true connection, and I couldn’t wrap my brain around how to proceed from here.

After a glance out the window, she wrapped herself in a blanket and darted to the bathroom with her clothes.

I found the jeans I’d worn the day I arrived folded neatly on one of the chairs at the table. I slipped them on, along with my T-shirt from last night, before sitting down hard and dragging a hand over my beard.

“Are you decent?” My dad shouted.

“Yeah. Come on in.”

He came through the door, heavy winter boots clomping across the hardwood and wearing his observant “dad” face as he headed in my direction and took my measure.

“You look like shit.” He pulled out a chair and sat. “What’s eating you? Did you fall in love with her? You always liked her. You know, back when you were a kid, right after your mom died,you told me you were going to marry her when you grew up. Do you remember that? She’s a sweet girl, that Lucy. Your mom liked her.”

My head snapped up. “Yeah, she is. She’s amazing. I don’t remember saying that though. Kinda wish I did.”

I could see myself saying it. She’d always been special to me.

“It was a hard time, Spence. I won’t say anything to her or your brothers, okay?” His eyes were steady on mine.

“Thanks. Uh?—”

He patted my hand, and I knew I’d be okay. “Took us forever to get up here. It’s nearly dinner time.” His eyes were shrewd on mine. "You slept all day. You two have a late night?”

He was prodding without being pushy. He was good at making observations that would open up an entire conversation. But I couldn’t answer him when Lucy and I were still new, and there was so much still left up in the air between us.

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