Page 52 of Eat Me

I bolt upright, my heart racing as I take in my surroundings. The bed I’m in is massive, with silky sheets and plush pillows. The room itself is spacious and tastefully decorated, with antique furniture and artwork adorning the walls. It looks like something out of a luxury hotel or a millionaire's mansion. This is no hotel, it’s my prison.

I look down at myself, realizing I’m wearing a soft nightgown that definitely isn't mine.I have been cleaned up and changed out of the clothes I was wearing. Not only had they changed my clothes but they cleaned me as well.

I feel my hair against my arms sway, my dark hair is down and has small knots from sleeping. Pushing my hair out of my face and take a calming breath, trying to gather my thoughts. The tests I went through may be over, but I’m still stuck in the cruel reality that will become my life.

“Fuck.” I mutter, hunching over as tears well up in my eyes. My hands go into my hair, gripping them at the roots. The pain from doing this keeps me grounded as I try not to have a full-blown meltdown. I can feel the heavy weight on my chest making it hard to breathe, and the sounds around me seemed to fall away as all I’m able to hear is my hitched and labored breaths.

I’m trying to get myself under control but the more I try to do that, the more worked up I get. I can’t hear anything around me. Not when someone enters or the light touches on my skin. I’m not even capable of registering that I’m being lifted with arms around me. A male voice whispers in my ear,“Breathe.”

I feel a hand tilt my head up and I look into blue eyes. Marcus is cradling me against his chest, arms wrapping around me, and my head rests in the crook of his neck. I gasp for air, my body trembling as Marcus holds me against his chest. His deep voice rumbles in my ear, whispering soothing words I can't quite make out through the fog of panic. A part of me wants to fight, to push him away, but I’m too weak and disoriented to do anything but cling to him as I struggle to breathe.

"That's it," Marcus murmurs, his arms tightening around me as I try to take deep breaths, but it feels more like I’m choking. "Just breathe, Victoria." Tears continue to stream down my face, but the crushing weight on my chest makes me gasp as choking sobs leave me. Trying to speak ends up as whimpers.

Marcus continues to murmur soothing words in my ear, a hand going through my hair in a comforting gesture, "Shh, it's alright. Just breathe with me, Victoria. In and out, nice and slow." I take in big gulps of air as another whimper leaves me,tears still falling. I feel Marcus brush them away looking at me with concern in his eyes.

“Take another breath, match your breathing with mine.” He mutters in my ear, brushing more tears off my cheeks. The warmth from his skin making me almost flinch away. I find myself involuntarily matching my breathing to his. He’s taking exaggerated breaths to try to get me to match him. I feel the heaviness in my chest start to loosen, as I take another gulp of air.

"That's it," Marcus says softly, his thumb brushing over my cheek in back-and-forth motions. As if trying to give me comfort. I take another breath, my breathing starts to go back to normal, "You're doing well."

As my breathing steadies, I became acutely aware of how close Marcus is. His arms are still wrapped securely around me, one hand gently cradling the back of my head while the other rubs soothing circles on my back. The intimacy of the position makes shame and anger flood through me, even as a traitorous part of me wants to lean into the comfort he’s offering. I hate that I’m finding comfort in the arms of one of my captors. I try to pull away, but Marcus has a firm hold on me.

“Calm down.” He speaks to me softly, pulling me more into his warm body. I’m trying to fight my body’s reaction, but I’m to drained. I allow myself to relax into him, blinking my eyes up at him. He gives me a small smile as he moves his hand to gently caress my hair in a soothing motion. He releases a hum, as I don’t flinch or try to fight his gestures.

“There is a good Princess.” Marcus says, causing me to tense at his words, the pet name sends an unpleasant shiver through me. The fog of panic lifting and being replaced by a simmering anger.

"Don't call me that," I say, my voice hoarse from crying. I attempt to pull away again, but Marcus's arms remain firmly around me. "I'm not your princess."

Marcus chuckles, the sound rumbling through his chest. "Oh, but you are.Myprincess, Elijah’s Darling, Owen’s Sweetheart, and Jasper’s little bird…. And our bride-to-be." His hand continues to stroke my hair, the gesture at odds with the possessive tone of his voice. "You might as well get used to it."

I shake my head, fighting against the exhaustion that threatens to overwhelm me again, "Never. I'll never get use to this, or to you."

Marcus sighs, his breath warm against my ear. "You will, in time. We can be patient…. You're definitely worth it. "

I feel myself beginning to get worked up again as I hiss out, “Definitely not worth it. You should find someone else.” I know the words wouldn’t work but I still wanted to give him a hard time. Words are all I really have here.

Marcus sighs, his breath warm against my ear. "Victoria, you need to calm down. Getting worked up again won't help anything." I know he’s right, but I hate how easily he can soothe me. How a part of me wants to lean into his warmth and forget where I am. I’m supposed to hate these men.

"You can let go of me," I whisper, my voice still raw from crying. I give him a small glare when his arms tighten around me.

"Not yet," he says softly. "You're still shaking. Just take a few more deep breaths." I want to make a biting comment, but looking down, I can see the tremors in my hands. Taking a deep breath, my body starts to fully relax into the warmth of his embrace.

I feel my body relaxing against Marcus despite my best efforts to resist. His warmth and steady heartbeat are oddly soothing after the panic of waking up in this strange place. But I can't let myself find comfort in one of my captors.

"Please," I whisper, my voice hoarse. "I'm fine now. You can let go." I need him to not touch me. It was distracting and I don’tlike how I react to him or his brothers. If they don’t touch me, it’s easier to concentrate.

Marcus is quiet for a moment, his hand still stroking my hair. Then he sighs softly. "Alright," slowly loosening his hold, almost reluctantly, and helping me to sit on my own. The loss of his warmth leaves me feeling oddly at a loss, but I push that feeling aside.

"There, I was going to see how you are feeling today…but the panic attack told me what I needed to know.”

“Waking up changed, clean and in a bed, I didn’t know….after having to kill two men…. I wonder how I’m feeling.” The sharp sarcasm is clear as I give him a tired look, before looking down at my hands in my lap.

I hear Marcus give a snort of amusement at my words, “Feeling feisty today?” I give him a small glare, but he holds his hands up in silent surrender. Marcus's lips curve into a small smirk at my glare, but his eyes remain serious as he studies me. "I know this is a lot to process, Victoria. But fighting us at every turn will only make things harder for you in the long run."

Shaking my head, I wrap my arms around myself, "You can't possibly expect me to just accept this. To be okay with marrying four men I barely know, who kidnapped me and forced me to..." I trail off, unable to say the words aloud. The memory of blood on my hands makes my stomach churn.

Marcus sighs, reaching out to brush a strand of hair behind my ear. I flinch away from his touch. "We don't expect you to be okay with it right away," he says softly. "But you will adapt, in time. You're strong, Victoria."

I move my hair back from behind my ear as I sigh, “I may be strong but not invincible. I’m tired and I’m disgusted with myself for killing.”

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