Page 34 of If You Loved Me

I never considered myself a lucky man, but I sure as hell wished I was lucky enough to one day have the pleasure of tasting her.

“Wait,” she grabbed my bicep and the feel of her touch sent a lightning bolt straight to my crotch. I stopped just before I was about to hop onto the tailgate with her. She gave me a cute tilt of her lips and then she stretched her legs out, doing a funky little maneuver until her right leg hooked behind me and pulled me into her.

Her tongue darted out between her lips before she said softly, “I want you right here.” And then she tucked her fingers into the front pockets of my jeans. I went still as a stone. Feeling her hands that close to my cock had me about one second away from letting my self-control snap and taking her on the bed of my truck and making her come so hard she screamed my name into the cold night air.

This woman is going to be the end of me. That thought should have scared me, but I was starting to realize there was nothing normal about my reaction when it came to Sarah. She had a way of making me want to be better. A way of giving me hope that there was more to this life than I could ever dream of—that I everletmyself dream of.

“This is where you want me, sugar?”

“Yeah, cowboy.” The smell of something sweet mixed with nutmeg and clover had my mind spinning as she presseda tender kiss to the edge of my lips. “Now I can look in your eyes when you tell me your story.”

I leaned my hips into her as her hands dove deeper into my pockets. “And how, exactly, am I supposed to concentrate on the story when I have you this close?”

Her fingertips flicked against the lining of my pockets. “You’re a strong man, Ranger. I’m sure you can figure it out.” Then the little devil winked at me like she knew exactly what she was doing.

Somehow the nerves I’d felt earlier when she asked me to tell her what happened had gone away as I thought of where to start. When I looked into her eyes, I had a feeling all the flirting and close call touches weren’t just because we were on a date. She was trying to distract me.

I wanted to praise her for it.

With a long sigh, I placed my hands on the top of her thighs and tried not to read too much into the shiver that ran over her or there was no way I’d get through the story she was asking me to tell.

“My sister was looking at colleges to apply to for dual enrollment. She was always the smart one in the family. Too smart for her own good sometimes,” I chuckled, remembering all the creative ways she would reel our parents in and getmeinto trouble for somethingshedid.

“So, in her junior year of high school, I brought her to Atlanta to tour one of the universities that has an Agricultural Business major. We spent the weekend there during the second week of September. Looking back now, I wish more than anything that I’d chosen another time to go.”

“Why’s that?” Sarah’s head tilted to the side with curiosity brimming her eyes.

I shook my head. “I didn’t know it then, but we were touring the school in the middle of the sorority and fraternity rush. There were kids everywhere. Lines of girls chanting as they walked in high heels across campus and the guys were even crazier.”

“Yeah, I’ve never been the biggest fan of those institutions. I’ve always found the idea bizarre. But to each their own.” Sarah shrugged.

“It was definitely bizarre.” I thought back to seeing those poor girls stumble across campus, their feet bright pink with blisters as they tried to maintain their smiles.

“On our final night there, I left Callie Rose in the hotel room while I went out to pick up pizzas at one of the universities’s restaurants. As soon as I left our room, I had a feeling that something was off. I can’t explain it, even now. But it was the same feeling I had right before our mom told us our dad had died in the war. And like a dumbass, I ignored it. Chalked it up to thinking about Callie Rose being on her own in such a big city. Not listening to my gut that night cost me ten years of my life.”

Sarah didn’t say a word as she removed her hands from my pockets and placed them over mine, giving them both a gentle squeeze. Sadness was etched into the lines of her face. Sadness and…understanding.

The look in her eyes gave me the strength to continue. “It was pretty late when I headed out. There was hardly anyone on campus when I found them in a dark alcove betweenbuildings.” Flashes of that night made my head spin. “I noticed the sounds first. Drunken slurs mixed with fists meeting flesh. When I turned the corner and saw what was happening, my instinct just took over. Like a blanket of rage that couldn’t be stopped.

Her grasp on my hands tightened.

“Three guys were looming over this poor kid, each one of them taking shot after shot at his face. Telling him if he wanted to join their fraternity, they needed to beat the bitch out of him. That he was too weak of a man and the only way they’d let him in was if he proved he wasn’t a pussy.”

“Oh my God,” Sarah’s hands moved to cover her mouth as tears welled in her eyes.

“When I saw how bloodied his face was, I didn’t think. I just acted. I told the kid to run while I took them on. When he stumbled away, I let that rage fly. Giving them the instant karma they had coming. Once it started, I couldn’t stop. Every time I hit one of them, all I saw was that poor kid lying on the ground getting ganged up on by three older guys. It was so fucked up, Sarah. But what I did was worse.”

Her brows scrunched together. “What do you mean?”

My chest tightened. “I didn’t stop.” The words came out in a whisper. “I took advantage of them being drunk and I didn’t stop until every single one of them was a useless heap on the ground. It wasn’t until then that I recognized LeRoy Cummings. When I’d finally given them enough, he’d looked up at me through swollen eyes and I knew he recognized me too.

“It was only a few days after Callie Rose and I got home that the police showed up at my door and took me in.”

Sarah was looking down at where our hands were joined. I slipped a finger under her chin, tipping her head back so she was looking at me.

“I understand if it’s not enough. If my reason for doing what I did doesn’t make sense to you and you want to walk away from this before we get too deep, I understand.”

Gentle fingers clasped around my wrist. Her thumb rubbed over my pulse. “Here’s the thing, Ranger. I’m already in too deep. And I don’t think there’s anything you could do that could stop me from falling.”

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