Page 60 of If You Loved Me

The truth struck me like a blow to the gut. I wasn’t offended by what he said, I was offended that he was right. My parents—and the people I grew up around—would have given me hell for dating him.

“If I’m being honest as well, I don’t know if I would have had the mental fortitude to stand up to my parents back then.”

“And what about now?”

Tell him.Just get it out.

I opened my mouth to reveal my version of the truth. To tell him how I’d fallen into a trap with my mother and even though Ranger had my heart, I allowed my mother to have dominion over my mind.

But then I sealed my lips, once again. Fearful that thesame prejudice he spoke about my parents would coat his thoughts about me if he knew the truth.

His brows furrowed as his gaze sharpened on me. “What is it, Sarah?”

My heart leaped into my throat and I felt like I was going to be sick. Was I really about to risk everything and tell him about Jones? About my mother?

“Um,” I stuttered, my brain not quite knowing what I wanted to say as my heart battled for me to stay silent. To not risk losing this man who made everything seem right in the world.

The warmth of his open palm slid against my cheek and I savored the way his thumb stroked idly against my skin. Patient. He was so damn patient and I was being a coward.

I can do this, I internally whispered to myself.I owe this truth to him.

On a long exhale I looked him in those striking blue eyes and said, “There’s something I need to tell you, but I don’t want to taint this place.”

“You could never.” Concern shone in his eyes. “Just tell me what’s going on.”

I brought my hand up to where his was resting on my cheek and covered it. I didn’t want this to go away. I didn’t want us to end. But Ranger had a right to know what I’d done.

“I’ve already told you a little bit about my parents.” He nodded. “But I don’t think I’ve truly relayed how manipulative they can be.”

“Have they done something to you?” His voice was thickwith malice and something primal in me loved how protective he was.

I sighed. “They haven’t done anything directly to me, no. But a few weeks ago, my mother came into my bakery—which she’s never done before—and offered me a deal.”

His thumb stilled on my jawline. “I can’t imagine it was a savory one.”

My chest tightened. “No, it wasn’t.” On a deep inhale, I fought against the thudding of my heart and told Ranger the truth. “Her and my father have always been hung up on Theo and me finding therightmatches. Since we were young, it was expected for us to marry someone of equal or greater monetary status. When I bucked against that and decided not to marry in my early twenties like most other debutantes around here do, I was already fighting an uphill battle against my parents. Just two summers ago, my mother prevented me from landing an account with one of her friends. All it took was a phone call from her and I lost a major opportunity.”

Ranger’s face shifted to cold stone. “Why would she do something like that to her own daughter?”

I shrugged. “Punishment? Incentive to get me to bend to her will? I honestly don’t know why they’re so rigid in their beliefs. But it showed me just how far she was willing to go to show me her disapproval of my choices in life.

“So, when she came to my bakery and struck a deal, I knew that if I declined her there would be consequences.”

“What was the deal, Sarah?” I could hear it in his voice. That he’d march right over to my parents’ house and demand my mother to leave me the hell alone.

I couldn’t help the shaking in my voice as I said, “She told me that if I dated a man of her choosing, she would fully support my bakery. That she would encourage all of her friends to book their events with me so I could take the next step toward becoming an exclusive cake decorator.”

My next words came out in a rush. “So, I’ve gone on a few dates with her friend’s son. It was after you took me out on our first date and I already knew that no one in the world could compare to you, but I’ve struggled my entire life to be accepted by my mom and when she told me that she would endorse my dream of becoming a renown cake decorator, I didn’t know how to say no.” I sucked in a lungful of air and realized I was gripping the lapels of his brown jacket for fear if I let go, I’d lose him forever.

Heat hit the back of my eyes as I continued quietly, “He means absolutely nothing to me and I’m going to end things with him later this week. Not that there’s anything to trulyendbecause nothing’s happened between us and he’s actually kind of awful. But I’m going to tell him that I don’t want to see him anymore. That I’ve fallen for someone else.”

Ranger’s face was impassive. I opened my mouth to say more, to sayanythingthat would convince him that I wasn’t a completely awful person. But there was nothing else to say. So, I clamped my lips shut and let the silence linger between us.

Cold licked at my skin as the sun finally slinked beneath the horizon, leaving Ranger and me dusted in twilight. A muscle ticked along his jaw and I swore an eternity slipped by as he mulled over everything I said to him.

I couldn’t stand the silence anymore. “Say something,” I whispered. “Please.”

His gaze finally settled on me, his face still unreadable.