Page 119 of Maverick

"So what do I do? Because I've been thinking about this shit for months, and I'm still no closer to a solution."

"What's your worst case scenario?" Colton asks, idly tapping the toes of his shoes together.Tap, tap, tap."What if you decided to step back from pro-bono cases completely, and just focus on your work here, and your relationship with Cadence. What are you afraid will happen?"

"I'll turn into a resentful asshole and chase her away with my shitty attitude."

"Okay," Ransom says slowly. "So let's play it out the other way. What's the worse case scenario if you keep doing what you're doing?"

"I never see Cadence, and my ulcer eats through my entire stomach, and I end up having surgery. She tries to support me through it, but I'm a shitty patient, don't let myself heal, and go back to work too soon. She ends up leaving me because she thinks I care more about work than I do her. Which is pretty much what I've shown her."

Ransom's voice is dangerously low. "Maverick, do you have an ulcer?"

I didn't actually mean to let that slip, but I won't compound it by lying. "Yeah. Doc diagnosed it about six months ago."

"You stubborn goddamn motherfucking martyr. How the fuck did you think that was going to go over? You didn't think that was fucking important information."

"I'm handling it. I'm taking my meds," I say tiredly.

He glares at me, knocking his knuckles on his desk rhythmically.

I stare at Ransom, my jaw clenched. His anger is justified, but I'm too exhausted to deal with it right now.

"Look," I say, rubbing my temples, "I know I should've told you. But I've been handling it."

Ransom opens his mouth, probably to tear into me again, but Colton interrupts.

"Guys, let's focus on the problem at hand. Mav, what if we tried something different?"

I turn to Colton, eyebrow raised. "I'm listening."

"What if, instead of taking on pro bono cases yourself, you support a not-for-profit organization? And maybe spend one Friday a month volunteering there?"

I lean back, considering his words. "Go on."

"You wouldn't take on any cases personally," Colton continues, "but you could help funnel people to the resources they need. The staff would stay on top of the cases. You could check in, make sure they were handled, learn the outcomes, but for a year, just commit to one day a month."

I mull it over, feeling a glimmer of hope for the first time in months. "That... that could work. I'd still be helping, but not drowning myself in it." The idea takes root, and I can almost feel the weight lifting from my shoulders. It's like seeing a lifeline after treading water for so long.

Ransom nods slowly, his eyes still icy. "It's a good compromise. You'd be making a difference without sacrificing yourhealthor your relationship." Yep, he's pissed.

"And you'd have time to actually enjoy your life," Colton adds grimly, concern etched on his face. "And let's be real, if you don't make a change, you're going to end up sick if you're lucky, dead if you aren't. And just saying, we didn't build everything we have now just so that we could work ourselves to death." His blunt honesty hits home, forcing me to confront the reality of my situation.

I take a deep breath, feeling some of the stress I've been holding in my body for years. I can picture it, volunteering, helping, without the crushing responsibility all on my shoulders. It would be a fucking relief. Maybe I can find a balance between saving the world and saving myself. "Okay. I think that could work. I'll research some organizations, see which ones might beable to scale up easily. They'd need to be willing to take on more lawyers, and be okay with me helping out a bit." Though, in my experience, you hand people enough money, they get really fucking flexible.I'm relieved at the idea, yeah but there's also a twinge of guilt. Apparently, I do have a fucking hero complex.

Who knew?

Ransom stands and claps me on the shoulder. "Good. And Mav? No more hiding health issues from us. That is not okay."

I nod, feeling a mix of guilt and gratitude. "You're right. I'm sorry. I didn't want to worry anyone."

"I worry more about the shit I don't know," he says, glaring again. "All of you and your fucking secrets.I'mgoing to get a fucking ulcer from worrying about all of you."

Colton’s brow furrows as he looks at Ransom with confusion. "Why are you still worrying about the rest of us? We're all coupled up and happy. Things are good. You can relax now, man."

Ransom lets out a deep sigh, leaning back against his desk. His eyes meet mine, and I can see the weight of responsibility in them. "It's not that simple. There's not less worry now. If anything, there's more."

"More?" I echo, incredulous. "How?"

He runs a hand through his hair, a gesture I've seen a thousand times when he's trying to organize his thoughts. "Our family's doubled in size, Maverick. There are more people to think about now. More people to plan for."

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