Page 129 of Ransom

She laughs—actually laughs—and the sound fills my chest with warmth. "You always did have a flair for the dramatic."

"Says the woman who set herself on fire to prove a point."

"That was different. That was..." She trails off, her smile fading. "God, we were so young then. I can't believe I did that."

"I couldn't believe it either. But that day changed everything for me."

"It's not going to work, you know."

I drop the matches, then kick them under the tool bench. I meet Blair's level gaze with a glare. I'm taller now, Robert can fucking cook, and I'm nearly eye to eye with her. "I don't know what the fuck you're talking about."

She steps further into the dark of the shop. They were supposed to be asleep. I wasn't going to cause any permanent damage, but all the shit I've been pulling all year hasn't done a fucking thing. I'm still here in this bumfuck town. Jerry comes down to check in, but he won't take me back. Says there's no reason to remove me since I'm thriving.

I'm not fucking thriving. Yeah, I'm going to school, but only because the whole fucking town is keeping an eye on me. There's nowhere to go where Robert doesn't find out I'm skipping and come and take me back. After the first month, it just wasn't worth it anymore. And every time he picked me up, he just had that same calm look on his face.

And okay, I'm taller. I'm eating. But my brain is still fucked up. And something about being around the two of them makes it worse. They're so fucking settled here, and together. They talk about their days. They hang out and watch movies. And I'm still out in the cold. I don't want to join them. I don't accept their invitations.

"I honestly thought you were smarter than this. You set a fire; you might end up in trouble. But you won't get sent away. So what's the point? You make no sense."

"I don't want to be here. What's so hard to understand about that?"

She just shakes her head, eyes piercing. "You're lying to yourself. You do want to be here. You want it bad. And that pisses you off."

"You don't know what the fuck you're talking about."

One black eyebrow wings up. "You can't be this stupid."

As always, the way she talks to me makes me want to grab her. But that urge I had the first day I met her, that urge to punch her, isn't there anymore. It's turned into something else. Something I don't quite understand.

"How the fuck do you think you know anything about me? You with your perfect life and your perfect relationship with your dad. You don't know shit."

She's so still, standing there, letting the waves of my anger strike her. But none of it touches her. She just shakes her head and gives me a pitying look. "You don't see anything. You're too busy being a selfish asshole. It's okay. You're a foster kid. I'msure you think that gives you an excuse to hurt other people. I'm sure there's a psychological reason for why you're acting like a dick. Poor little boy."

I'm moving before I realize it. Suddenly, we're toe to toe. She's sixteen and not any kind of delicate, but I'm almost the same size. She should be sort of intimidated. I'm big and strong, but she doesn't even blink. Is it fucking genetic? "You don't fucking know me. You have no idea what I've been through."

There's that head tilt again, looking at me like a bug under a microscope. "You lost your family."

Lost. What a stupid fucking word. "I killed my family."

She still doesn't react. Not even a twitch to show she heard me. "I killed my mom too. I didn't mean to, but I did."

"What the fuck do you mean? How?"

"I was born. I lived, and she died.” She’s so matter-of-fact about it, like it didn’t affect her whole life. But not having a mom sucks.

"That's fucking sad. But it's not the same thing. Not at all."

She just shrugs again. "How did you kill your family?"

"You can't just ask people shit like that."

"You brought it up first. And I told you about my mom. So now you have to share your big dark secret. That's the rule."

"The rule?"

"The conversation rules. You share; I share; then you share again. And then I nod and put a sad face on to show you I care."

"Your sad face?"

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