The pain in her voice cuts through me like a knife. "I had to," I say, my own voice cracking. "Your dad, he?—"
I bite my tongue, the words dying in my throat. The truth hovers between us, a secret I've carried for years. But I can't bring myself to tell her. Robert's memory deserves better, and Blair... she's been through enough.
"I had to," I repeat lamely, the explanation feeling hollow even to my own ears. "It's complicated, Blair. More than you know."
Her eyes narrow, searching my face for something. I don't know what she sees, but whatever it is makes her shake her head in disgust.
"Well, that's mysterious as fuck. But I'm not biting. I've learned a lot of things in the last twenty-five years, but the biggest one? Don't waste your time on people who don't appreciate you. And you're right on the top of that fucking list, Ransom. So I don't care. About any of it. I don't care why you did it. I don't care why you won't stop fucking hounding me. All I want is peace. So leave. Get in your stupid, expensive car and go back to where you came from. Because I don't want you here. Nobody does."
The finality in her voice hits me like a physical blow. I watch as she climbs into her truck, the engine roaring to life. She doesn't look back as she pulls away, leaving me standing alone on the side of the muddy road.
I drag myself back to my car, sinking into the leather seat. The interior still smells new, a stark contrast to the earthy scent of mud and grass clinging to my shoes. I sit there, hands gripping the steering wheel, knuckles white with tension.
"Fuck," I mutter, slamming my palm against the dash. The pain barely registers through the storm of emotions raging inside me. How the fuck did I let that get so out of control? Everything I planned to say, all my carefully worded arguments just flew out of my fucking head when I saw Blair.
The power of her just took my fucking breath away.
My phone buzzes, pulling me from my spiral of self-loathing. It's the family group chat. Jonas and Declan are proposing a movie night. Any other time, I'd jump at the chance. But right now, the thought of pretending everything's fine makes my stomach churn.
I type out a quick response:
Sorry, guys. Got plans tonight. Next time.
My plans are fucked, though, aren't they? I toss the phone onto the passenger seat and lean back, staring at the rearview mirror. The road stretches out before me, leading back to Chicago, back to my life.
But my eyes keep drifting out the windshield to the road leading into Badger Falls. To Blair.
I've never seen her that cold. The night I broke things, she was hurt. There was rage. It made sense. Our feelings were so big that the love she had for me morphed into other powerful emotions.
The rage she came at me with tonight felt good. It felt familiar.
The ice queen didn't. And the certainty in her voice, the finality, shook me.
She's done with me.
But I am the world's biggest fuckup because I'm never going to be over her.
It hits me like a freight train. I can't go back. Not now, not after seeing her again. The wound I pretended had healed years ago has been ripped wide open, and I know with bone-deep certainty that I won't find peace until I make things right.
I need to fix things with Blair.
I can't live the rest of my life knowing she hates me. I'm not strong enough.
Facing her again, truly making things right, is the only way for me to move forward.
The thought should terrify me. It does terrify me. But it also feels right in a way nothing has in years. I've built an empire, surrounded myself with family and friends, but there's always been something missing. Someone missing.
I'm not stupid enough to think I could ever have her back. Maybe I harbored a secret hope that I could, but the look in her eyes made it clear tonight that any love she had for me is dead.
And it's all my fucking fault. I killed it.
I grip the wheel, but instead of turning around and heading back to Chicago like she wanted, I head straight. The "Welcome to Badger Falls" sign looms in my headlights, and a mix of dread and anticipation coils in my gut.
I have no idea how I'm going to do this. Blair made it crystal clear she wants nothing to do with me. But I can't walk away again. I won't.
As I drive through the familiar streets, memories wash over me like a tidal wave, each one hitting harder than the last. The diner where Blair and I used to share milkshakes is still there, a few people in the booths. I wonder if it still smells the same? Is the lady that owned it still there? She was older back then, so it's not likely, but the idea of her being gone feels wrong.
I drive around the town square, past our favorite bench. The one we'd sit on and talk for hours. The one that I broke her heart on.