Page 61 of Ransom

"Because she hates me enough to say no because it's me. I thought that what I did to her would be all she's thinking about, instead of what the money could do for her."

"What you did to her," he echoes. There's no question in his tone, but I know him well enough to know he's dying to ask. But Nick understands guilt. And he understands the mistakes you pay for with your future.

"I was in love with her, man. Not kid love, real love. Yeah, I was young, but she was it for me. And her dad had a problem with it."

"Because you were a foster kid? That's fucked up."

"No. Because I was fifteen. And she was about to turn eighteen. And he found us in her room together one night. We didn't… we didn't have sex. But we were heading that way. Fuck, if we hadn't been interrupted, we would have. I was ready. We both were."

"Almost eighteen," he murmurs, and I hear the understanding in his voice. "Fuck. That kind of gap between two people in their twenties is no big deal. But at that age, the law is pretty clear."

"Yeah, it is. And he was afraid for her if we crossed the line."

"Blair doesn't always understand boundaries, Ransom. She might not realize the consequences of her actions. And I'm terrified she's going to end up in handcuffs because of it."

I still remember the tightness in his face, the worry in his eyes. He was terrified, and back then, I didn't fully grasp how scared he actually was. But he was a cop. He had to have seen all kinds of things. That label, 'statutory rape,' is something that you can't escape. It's a fucking crime.

"Is that why you ended up leaving town? He sent you away to protect her?" God, if only he had sent me away. It would have been easier on me, that's for damn sure. I would have someone other than myself to blame.

But that's not how it happened.

"It wasn't like that. He didn't send me away. I decided to go. I didn't want anything to hurt her. I didn't want her life ruined. And I knew I couldn't stay there, in the bedroom next to hers, and not want to be with her."

"So you left the only family you had and went to that fucking hellhole?"

Groaning, I bark out a laugh. Hellhole is a pretty accurate description of that group home we all met at. My line there wasn't straight, though. I took a detour first, but that's another thing I never discussed with my brothers. "Yeah, pretty much."

"How the fuck did you handle that? How did you not just curl up into a ball and check the fuck out?"

I did."It was something Robert said, actually, before I left. There was a lot of fucked-up shit going on in my head back then, but he told me that I should find a group of people who would watch my back and work together to build a life."

"And you just walked in there with a plan?"

"I didn't go straight there. I spent a year at another group home first."

"How the fuck didn't I know this?" There's a bite in his tone that I can't be too mad at. "Why are you such a secretive fuck?"

"Because my past is a black fucking hole that sucks me in. I can't go there. I can't let myself get pulled down." My throat is tight, faces of the people I've lost flashing in front of my eyes. "I'm afraid I'll never get back out."

Nick falls silent on the other end of the line. I can almost hear the gears turning in his head as he processes everything I've just dumped on him.

"I get it, man," he finally says, his voice low and understanding. "I've caught glimpses of that darkness before, but I never wanted to pry. Just know, if you ever want to talk about it, I'm here. Always."

His words hit me hard, a lump forming in my throat. "Thanks, brother. I appreciate that."

"So," Nick continues, clearing his throat. "Are you coming home?"

I hesitate, my grip tightening on the steering wheel. "Yeah, I'm heading back."

"You don't sound too sure about that."

"I am," I insist, but even I can hear the doubt in my voice.

"What are you really walking away from here, Ransom?" Nick probes gently. "Talk to me."

I take a deep breath, trying to sort through the jumble of emotions in my head. "Nothing. There's nothing left between Blair and me. It's ancient history. I should just leave her to her life and go back to mine."

"Uh-huh," Nick says, skepticism dripping from his tone. "And you believe that?"

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