Page 101 of Fake Out Hearts

Chapter 31

Becca

I wake the next morning in Theo’s bed with Milo sleeping peacefully at our feet, which makes me smile. I don’t realize it at first, but when I roll over, Theo is awake too, watching me.

“Good morning. How are you feeling?” he asks, and I drag my fingertips across his pecs.

“A little groggy, but good. Glad to be home, that’s for sure,” I say, and although it passes quickly, I notice Theo’s face light up. And I know why. I think that’s probably the first time I’ve referred to being here, in his condo with him, as “home.” But it’s true. This is my home now, and I finally feel it.

“That makes two of us,” Theo says before I can add anything else. He kisses the top of my head and idly plays with my hair, making my scalp tingle in the most relaxing, wonderful way. I could lie like this with him all day and never get tired of it, so I don’t want to ruin the moment, but I feel like I owe him an explanation. Or at the very least, some reassurance that this won’t be a common occurrence.

“Listen, about yesterday,” I start, half expecting him to shush me, but he doesn’t say anything. He just keeps massaging my scalp, listening. “I already told you I used to have an eatingdisorder. But I really need you to know that it’s something I worked through. It’s not a problem for me anymore.”

“And I already told you that I believe you,” Theo says, smiling down at me. “But I’m here if you want to talk about it.”

I hesitate because I feel like we should talk about it, but I’m not really sure what I want to say. “It started when I was a teenager.”

“That makes sense. That’s a tough time for young women with puberty and image and all that.”

“Yeah, but the weird thing is that I didn’t really have a problem with any of that. I was in good shape already from all the dancing I did, and I didn’t hate what I saw in the mirror or anything.”

“Hm. Then where do you think it came from?”

I pause to think because it’s not something anyone has ever asked me before. “Honestly? My mom and the way we lived. Things were always so chaotic, so out of control and unpredictable. I never really knew if I was going to get a meal with her, or if she would even be there when I got home from school, so not eating gave me some weird sense of control and constancy in my life. And I kept it going. At least then I knew what to expect, you know?”

“That’s heartbreaking,” Theo says, and it makes my chest clench because he’s right, but I’ve never really allowed myself to feel that way. “I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t have to be. It wasn’t your fault.”

“I know, but still. I hate hearing that you had to live like that,” he says and squeezes me against his chest. “I promise that will never be something you’ll have to worry about with me.”

“Neither is the eating disorder. I’m much better now. I think I just got stressed and fell back into bad old habits.”

“It’s okay, I understand. It’s been an incredibly rough few weeks for you. Anyone would crack at least a little under that kind of pressure. I get it.”

“Thank you. That means a lot. I just hope you don’t think I’m… defective or something now as a wife.”

Theo sits up abruptly, his jaw tightening.

“I don’t think that, and Ineverwill,” he says intensely. “And I don’t want you to think it either, princess. Not for a single damn second. I hate the idea of you thinking you’re anything less than perfect just the way you are.”

We stare at each other, and my heart pounds in my chest until he reaches out to cup my face in his hand. His thumb strokes my cheek tenderly, and I think he’s going to pull me up for a kiss, but he just holds me there with his gaze locked on me.

The air between us seems to thicken, making it hard to breathe. I don’t know what it is or what to call it, but it’s there—somethingbuilding between us.

I want to ask him, to ask if this feels as real to him as it does to me, but I’m terrified to say it out loud. I’ve already caused enough chaos in the last couple of days, so I don’t want to complicate things any more than I already have.

And I couldn’t bear to hear it if he didn’t agree.

But then he does lean into me, gently pressing his lips against mine, and my body catches fire. I climb closer to him, my hands wandering across his chest as his hands slide up beneath the hem of the shirt—hisshirt—that I’m still wearing. He strokes my back as the kiss heats up, but when my hand drifts down to his cock, he freezes and pulls away.

“I want you, princess,” he says, his voice hoarse. “So fucking much. I always want you. But we can’t. Not until you’re recovered.”

I can’t hold back a grimace or hide my sexual frustration, even though I understand. Theo has always been protectiveof me, so it’s no surprise that he’s even more protective and worried about me right now. As badly as my body burns for him, I know there’s no way he’ll give in right now. So it’ll have to be enough to know that he wants me too.

“Why don’t we get some coffee and breakfast?” he suggests, pressing one last chaste kiss to my lips. “You stay here, I’ll bring it up to you.”

“You really don’t have to do that. I’m fine,” I insist, but he just gives me a look, undeterred.

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