Page 49 of Diamond

Stupid and reckless.

Roshan has moved close now, his eyes still staring at the dead creature, fear evident in them. Clearly he can't always be trusted to protect her.

I've never had to work alone before. I have always had my brothers to rely on, and we made certain that no woman had to defend herself. I can't provide that for Nasrin. In fact, I think I will need to start teaching her how to protect herself.

If she'll even let me.

I am not sure she understood when I explained that I don't have control over whether or not I kill, as there will always be enemies but I am glad she is not gone yet.

"I'm glad we took the cart. I can't walk far with this inconvenience," I mutter to myself as I stare at the wound.

We will need to get moving soon, but my injured leg will slow me down and leave me almost completely incapable of protecting Nasrin and Roshan.

They are both injured and have no way of protecting themselves and I let myself get a leg and a hand wound. The worst possible locations.

"I think I know what that was," Nasrin says as her hand absentmindedly strokes at Roshan.

I look at her questioningly and notice that Roshan has its eyes on me, staring at my wound.

"A braceaaer. They're hunters, like the genali. Tehlmar told me about something that is stronger than it looks."

Being reminded of that male makes my marks flair.

Roshan gets up from where he is pressed beside her and wanders to where I am. He holds my gaze for a long moment before settling beside me, not touching, just hovering.

"I thought he hated me," I say and her shoulders jerk up and down.

Her face is more relaxed. "I thought so too, but he did just see you defend us."

I place a tentative touch on the nose of the animal, and it leans its face into my hand, taking me by surprise. "You must be right. He's a smart animal."

Nasrin's eyes light up and her brown-pink lips stretch into a smile.

I've only seen her direct it at the animal, not me, and now I know why Roshan bleats at her and pushes in for pets. She's as beautiful as the rising sun. I want her to always have a smile on her face when she looks at me.

I'm still enjoying the glow of it when she turns back to Roshan.

"He is the smartest ever."

She keeps on talking about the animal, and before it would have made me jealous, but now I have some hope that she will some day give me the same regard.

Hopefully, I'll do less bleating than Roshan, but I'm not too proud to do what must be done.

If she had not told me herself, I would have been convinced that they came from the same planet and had been together most of their lives. It makes me feel a lot better knowing that Roshan has warmed up to me, almost like I am a part of the loving relationship they have.

I know that I will not be fully a part of what they have, as we will have to separate when they unite with Ree, but I am willing to enjoy the affection while I have it.

After she is done doting on Roshan, Nasrin looks up at the sky. "No sign of dawn yet?"

"The days seem to be abnormally long and the nights must be the same," I tell her. "We should start heading out before we gain more attention or this blood attracts predators."

We glance at the dead braceaaer and then at each other, a strained silence falling on us. "We will have to go a different way than I planned, and you will need a weapon."

She shakes her head with vigor, her long white hair whipping against her face. "No. I understand why you have to do it, but I don't want to. I… I can't."

Her hands are shaking now and once again I wonder why she is so opposed to protecting herself with a weapon when she just used a rock as one.

It makes no sense.

---