Page 70 of Losing his Daddy

Wes and I were up earlier than usual, so he decided to read the paper at home. He didn’t always do so, but when he did, I would take the time to watch him scour through it all before reading what he discarded. We’d then discuss high and low points until he had to leave.

I’d just taken a sip of coffee and reached for my first section of the day when it happened. I looked up to admire the man across from me, but my gaze caught on the back of the paper in his hand. My entire body shook with the force of the blow that came at seeing the large image printed there.

Leaning over the table, I tugged on the page. “Sir,” I said breathlessly.

He let go immediately, then moved to my side. In a crouched position, he watched me as I flipped to the article. It was a piece about the Coleman Ranch and their need to give back.

My eyes watered as I stared into the faces of my friends, the men I knew like family. Atticus, Bobby Allen, Corey, Harlan, and Beau were all there. But so were others. Men I’d not known quite as long, though they’d all welcomed me the same. Only one face wasn’t that familiar, but from the closeness he had to Corey, I figured there had to be something going on there.

For a while, I wondered if the ranch had turned into a matchmaker’s paradise. It seemed like after I’d lost my other half, everyone else’s showed up. Like Clancy leaving me paved the way for others to come around.

If I believed in guardian angels, I might have said it was his way of taking care of them all.

“Is that them?”

I nodded. “Yes, Sir. It’s them.”

He hummed. “They look happy. That’s good, right?”

“It is.” I couldn’t get anymore words out. I was too choked up to try.

“The article says that posts about them went viral online. Apparently, people loved that an LGTBQ+ group of cowboys were making blankets and hats for NICU babies. Some guy named Ashley is spearheading it. Says here he’s a veteran.”

I knew immediately that he was the one person I didn’t recognize. His name also further confirmed what he was to Corey. I’d known about his secret pen pal for ages. Originally, it had been an accident that I’d seen one of the letters before it got to him. Rather than open it and snoop, I left all the mail in the box, then sent him out to check on it.

If there was one thing I understood, it was a need to keep secrets.

Which… was that what I was still doing? Had I traded out one thing for another? In the past, I’d felt like Clancy’s dirty little secret. My love for him overshadowed my reasoning, keeping me from suggesting that we tell the others about us.

And now I was with Sir — with Wes. Instead of sharing it with the people who I loved and cared for, I’d kept to the city under the guise of not wanting to face my past.

The truth was, my past hadn’t ever left. It would be with me forever. I couldn’t outrun my addiction, nor did I want to. Going through what I did made me into the man I was, into the man who’d rebuilt himself from nothing.

I turned to face Sir. Sometime between last night and this morning, I’d shifted my thoughts to wanting him to be that forme all the time. With the way his gaze pored over my features, I assumed he’d have no problem with the change.

“Yes, Precious. What do you need?”

“I think I need to go back. To see them. To see your brother. I can’t go forward if I don’t deal with what I ran away from.”

He smiled softly. “Are you sure this is what you want? To go back to the place that left you hurting?”

“I’m sure. It feels right. Plus, I miss them. I didn’t realize how much until I saw their faces.”

“Can you tell me about them? I’d like to know who is who.”

I nodded, then told him little details for each. I shared memories with him, some funny and others serious. I talked about how we worked as a team, how we were all family.

“I’d love to meet your family, Precious. Whenever you’re ready, I’ll be there to support you through it,” Sir said softly, his smile comforting in all the best ways.

It was then I realized just how deeply I’d fallen for him. While I’d been hellbent on holding off sex and protecting myself from repeating the past, my heart had thrown up a peace sign and taken the dive. I was completely in love with Weston Jeffry.

I couldn’t picture a life without him, nor did I really want to.

Using all the courage I had, I admitted such to him. “I love you, Sir. And I really, really want to introduce you to my family. I want to meet yours too.”

Tears welled in my eyes as his smile lit up the room. “That sounds perfect to me. I’d love to meet them. And for the record, I love you too. I have for a while now.”

I huffed. “Then why didn’t you say anything?”