Page 22 of With Wine Comes War

I sat at the kitchen island and ate dinner. I kept reaching for my phone knowing I needed to let it go, but I couldn’t. Finally, I picked up my plate and put it in the sink with a frustrated thunk. I grabbed another beer from the fridge and threw half of it back before settling onto the stool, picking up my phone to resume game time.

From: ROMAN

Reply to: ALEX

Subject: “TRUTH OR DARE”

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RK

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The body of the message didn’t say anything else. I was leaving it up to her. I took my laptop out of the bag and walked over to the sofa in the living room. I opened the drawer on the chairside table next to it and grabbed the remote for the stereo. I needed something to distract me from my obsessing about her response to the email. No telling how long it would take for her to answer, or if she even would. I had the app set to a classical station– the one Alex and I both listened to. I love that we have that in common. I smiled thinking about the time we danced under the stars. Her warm body in that red dress pressed up against mine and the smell of lavender from her hair was so lovely. I shifted uncomfortably on the couch, adjusting myself as the memories were also bringing back the first night we had sex. I’m not sure I would’ve gotten involved with this woman had I known how incredibly complicated she was, but it’s too late to wish her away now. She’s seeped so deeply under my skin and into my soul that I can barely tell where she begins, and I end.

I went through some work documents, talked to my mom and Harrison then switched from beer to bourbon to relax. I was trying to keep myself occupied so I wouldn’t be temptedto check my emails every ten minutes. It’s sad that this is what my nights have turned into.

I leaned my head back on the couch and decided to try some visualization techniques my mom taught me when I was first dealing with my empathic anxiety. First you need to be clear about what you really want. If she responds to the email with dare, should I dare her to call me? What if she says, truth? What do I want to know– if she’s happy? Of course she’s not happy. I saw her face at the restaurant, she’s fucking miserable. Broken hearts don’t make people happy and if she is happy then she’s sadistic and some kind of praying mantis or black widow spider and I’m truly fucked because I’d rather have her and let her kill me then be without her. I didn’t do anything for her not to love me. Those drugs couldn’t possibly last this long, could they? If they are then Tanner is truly a sick fuck and he needs to go away for life.

As I was slipping farther down this torture spiral, feeling myself drift off to sleep, I heard an email notification. My eyes slowly opened, and I reached for my phone. The lights were low in the penthouse but the reflection from the phone might as well be a beacon from outer space. The subject said, “FAVOR.” I can do favors.

From: ALEX

Reply to: ROMAN

Subject: “FAVOR”

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I know this is off the topic of Truth or Dare, but I need a favor. Can you meet me tomorrow for lunch or just meet before my training tomorrow? Its business related, but it’s also a personal favor.

Sincerely,

Alex Kennedy

Realtor

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Ok, this shit’s getting weird, these visualization techniques my mom turned me onto a few years ago have worked almost every time I’ve put them to practical use. But honestly, I don’t think Alex and I could stay away from each other if we tried no matter what kind of drugs are in her system.

From: ROMAN KING

Reply To: ALEX KENNEDY

Subject: Re: FAVOR

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Yes Ms. Kennedy, I’ll check with my assistant, Amelia, and see where we can fit you in tomorrow.

Kind Regards,

Roman F. King Jr.

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From: ALEX KENNEDY

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