Page 69 of With Wine Comes War

“Were you like this with your ex-fiancé?” I’m not sure if I should throw her into the mix, he doesn’t seem to like to talk about her.

“I got angry with her, that’s for sure. Nothing like this. She had a very wrong idea about who I was. She tried to get her name on the business and the building for that matter. She used me to climb the social ladder. She wouldn’t know love if it bit her in the ass. All she wanted was money. Thank God for Amelia, apparently.”

“Really, what did Amelia do?”

“She went to my mom who then had a long talk on the swings with me.” I felt sad for him and leaned against him. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder. I wasn’t afraid of this Roman. I was a little worried about Roman from last night, but it didn’t seem to be directed at me.

“So, your mom was the one who talked you out of the engagement because of Amelia?”

“That’s what I was told.” he paused, taking in a few calming inhales and exhales.

“Baby, I’m so sorry you witnessed that side of me. I can’t take it back. I wish I could’ve just told you. It’s been a long time since anything like that’s happened. It’s hard to say where my mind goes.”

“Do I have anything to worry about if I somehow make you mad?” He laughed, tugging me onto his lap so he couldlook down at me.

“Alex, do you know how many times you’ve made me mad?” Hmm, good question.

“Who me? I’ve been a perfect little angel, so none.” He laughed louder as he rolled me to my side and swatted my left ass cheek hard.

“Ow! What was that for?” I laughed through the fake reaction.

“That was for making me mad for the millionth time. I promise that you can’t elicit that reaction from me honey. You hold my heart, Alex. If I think you’re hurting from something I’ve done, it will break my heart.”

Oh my God. If he did something to hurt me it would break his heart, but what if I did something to hurt him, would it break mine? Do I even have a heart to break, or does he have mine too?

“Do you think maybe we should hold off on living together until after the court hearing?”

“Why do we need to wait?” Because I could fuck this all up and I’d rather not have to move twice.

“I just don’t want to have too much to think about right now. I want to get court out of the way and then we can revisit this. Is that alright?”

He nodded and went to the kitchen to refill our wine glasses. I’m guessing that answer was not alright.

***

ROMAN

As we were cleaning up after dinner, I really felt the need to apologize. “I’m sorry for being so forward. I realize you’ve got a lot of shit going on right now and this may have caused a little more stress, butI know this is right and it’s what I want. I know it’s what you want too.”

“Are you just doing this so you can protect me, because I don’t need protecting forever.” She questioned my motives, and she might be right, but I’d like to believe it’s because I just wanted her to move in.

“I’m not sure you even need it now, but it does make me feel better to know you’re safe with me.”

“If this is some kind of control freak shit, you’re going to be disappointed. If you start telling me what to do, I’ll run the other way. You know this.” I laughed watching her facial expressions. She’s so expressive. She looks like a crazed doll right now.

“As much as I’d like you to listen to me, I know it’s not something I’ll ever be able to control.” She scrunched up her face.

“Of course I’ll listen to you. I just won’t be doing everything you tell me to do or not to do.” I shook my head, grabbing her into a hug.

“Do you really think that’s what this is about? We move in together and you no longer have a life?” She gave me an innocent look and shrugged her shoulders.

“Alex, we have some work to do here. I have no desire to control you. I love you and I want you to move in, that’s all. Being able to protect you and know where you are is just a little perk that would come with it.”

I heard her let out a sigh before she said, “I don’t know what a relationship is supposed to look like, that’s why this scares me. Either I was in a marriage with all kinds of abuse aside from physical or I was in a one and done. I have nothing really to compare this too. It’s not like it’s any easier. It’s not like my parents displayed the best role models. I mean my mom treated my dad like crap and he just took it. I hated that he did that.”

“Well, sounds to me like you need to see how people are supposed to treat each other in a relationship. Stop trying to compare this to that and just see what happens naturally. If I start to smother you or you think I am, then say something and I’ll give you space. I’ll do the same for you when you’re giving me too much space.” I winked at her, and she giggled.

“Oh my God this is going to be a shit show.” I swear she has the most negative outlook on relationships. At least she’s smart enough to know she needs therapy; a lot of it.

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