Page 89 of Say It Isn't So

When I rolled my eyes and tried to play it off, he leaned forward again and reached for my hands, taking one in each of his.

“I’m serious. You’re stronger than you think, Bianca.”

I didn’t always feel strong. In fact, thinking about the way I let my fear of loss hold me back sometimes, I felt quite the opposite. “We should probably finish this lobster, right?” As I asked the question, I went back to eating.

The truth was, I had lost too much for my liking. My grandparents’ deaths had made sense because they were old. They hadn’t been sick, but they hadn’t been young. They had lived a good and healthy life and made a lot of memories, shared beautiful ones with the entire family, their friends, and even neighbors.

But my mom. . . that was a loss that would never make sense to me.

None of that mattered, though. Not right now anyway.

I was in Paris, one of the most romantic cities in the world with a man who’d brought me to the heart of the city. Nothing would ever top this.

Everything else would forever pale in comparison to the way Knox treated me. Like a queen. Like I mattered. Me—I mattered.

If I could have written a letter to my younger self, I would have told her:you’re going to meet a man one day who genuinely cares about you and only you. He’s going to listen attentively, and be all the things you’ve always wanted and deserve. And it all happens because you allowed yourself to forget your fear of loss and give him a chance. Don’t worry, he’s worth it.

* * *

Knox

Putting my drink down, I cleared my throat. “So it looks like our international rendezvous will be coming to an end.”

Bianca leaned back and licked her lips. “It would seem so. But I’m actually happy to be going back to New York. I’ve missed it.”

“Everything will change.”

“You mean, we won’t be spending nearly every waking second together?”

“That.” I laughed. “And us.”

Her brows drew in. “What do you mean?”

“Well, your dad.” It had to be brought up, whether or not I wanted it to be. We had to figure out where this left us. Where we were going to go from here. “I know you want this, you said so last night, and I want this, too, but you told your dad we were just friends, which was true at that point. But do you see us remaining friends?”

She shook her head, biting her bottom lip. “Knox, I think we crossed the line last night when we kissed. And this”—she gestured around us—“is nice, but no friend would ever bring me here.”

“But I know you don’t want to lie to your dad.”

She cracked her neck as though feeling the tension of the situation. “You’re right,” she said. “I don’t want to lie to him. So when we get back, I’ll tell him the truth.”

“Are you sure? Because if you’re not ready, I understand. I’m not trying to push the issue, I just think it warrants a discussion.” I picked up my glass and took a sip before setting it back down on the table. “You know I’ll stand by you one hundred percent no matter what you choose to do.”

She leaned forward again and extended a hand across the table. I took it in mine and rolled one of her rings around her finger before leaning forward to plant a kiss on the top of it. I looked up as I did and her lashes fluttered, the corners of her lips curling upward.

“I want to be able to go on a date with you without worrying someone will catch us and say something to my dad, or my dad himself will catch us. It’s too nerve-wracking and, as hot as it can be, sneaking around and hiding our relationship isn’t something I want.”

I nodded my agreement. “I feel the same way.”

She squared her shoulders and winked at me. “Then it’s settled, when I get home, I will tell my dad that we’re exploring our feelings for one another.” Then she shrugged casually as she turned back to her plate. “What’s the worse that can happen anyway?”

“He could forbid it,” I joked and followed her lead, turning my attention to my plate.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Knox

new york

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