Page 44 of The Mended Hearts Bookshop

“I can help you fix this,” Ash said simply. “I’m an accountant, remember? I’m not saying I can magic money out of thin air, but I can get you sorted with a debt counselor, get all of this consolidated, start a payment plan. You’re not the only person in the world to get into this state. There are places that will help you, you’re not alone.”

Pen took a breath feeling like she could really breathe for the first time in months. She hadn’t realized just how much she’d been packing away, hiding, pretending. “You… you can do that?”

“Obviously,” Ash said. She sighed and looked away. “And I suppose I could help with that thing for the council as well, if you wanted.”

???

“I don’t know what to say,” Pen said.

“Thank you would be fine,” said Ash. She sniffed and didn’t look at Pen. The sight of her sad and tear-stained was suddenly a little much for her to stand.

“I think this deserves more than a thank you.”

“Well, you don’t have any money to pay my bill, so perhaps we should stick with thank yous for right now.”

She heard Pen sigh next to her. “Ash… I know that this must be hard for you as well, to offer to take something on like this, to become tangled with someone else. I get the feeling that you see yourself as alone all the time.”

“Maybe,” Ash said. She swallowed. She supposed she might as well be honest. “Except that George told me something today that made me think that maybe I might have, um, misjudged things a bit. Or at least not considered all my options.”

“George did?” Pen asked. “What did he say?”

“That he thought I was gay,” Ash said. It sounded weird just saying it. She thought she felt Pen move a little further away from her.

“Oh… oh. You’re um, you’re not then?”

“What? You thought it too?” Ash said, turning to look at Pen. Pen’s face was upturned, looking up at her with eyes smeared with make up. Which made Ash remember that Pen liked her face and that in turn made her think that actually… actually she quite liked Pen’s face as well. “Am I wearing a big old lesbian hat or something?”

“No,” Pen said. “Not at all… I just… Well, I suppose it’s just one of those things. I mean, I’m gay so I suppose I default to other single women being gay too. I didn’t mean anything by it and I apologize if I’ve made you uncomfortable or anything.”

“You’re gay?” Ash said, opening her eyes wide.

“Yes, you, um, didn’t know?”

“Why would I?” said Ash. Although she supposed things were starting to make more sense now. Jesus, being a lesbian must be a nightmare. How were you supposed to know who else was and wasn’t? Unless they told you, she supposed.

Like Pen had just done.

Pen with her nice face and kind heart and massive debts.

“Well, I am,” Pen said. “Gay, that is.”

“Huh,” said Ash. “Well, I’m… not sure but maybe I am?”

“Wait, I thought you weren’t,” Pen said, looking confused.

Her lips pushed forward when she was confused, like someone would do if they were about to kiss you. Like men did at the end of a date when they left you on a doorstep, at which point Ash would usually duck inside and cry out a thank you as the door closed behind her.

That wasn’t what she was supposed to do. She could see that now. She could see how that little lip thing could make yourstomach turn somersaults and your mouth dry up and your heart beat a bit too hard and then…

And then she did the unthinkable.

She kissed Pen right on her candy-red lips.

Chapter Nineteen

“Oh, God,” Ash said, practically jumping up off the couch. “That was horrifically inappropriate.”

It took Pen a second to recover her senses. Ash’s lips had seemed so sure, the touch of her had been like coming home in a way that Pen hadn’t known she’d needed. “Inappropriate?” she said when she found her voice. “Inappropriate?” She couldn’t think of a word that was more, well, inappropriate.

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