Page 7 of Winter Memories

The reality is that we were broken long before that happened.

Fear grips me at the thought of seeing Fletcher married and happy now. I don’t know anything about his life anymore; it was better for me to not know. I swore my parents to secrecy when it came to the life of the guy who I’ve loved my entire life.

Even though I didn’t hear anything about how the last 13 years have gone for Fletcher, that doesn’t mean I haven’t thought about and wondered about him every day. I have. He’s like a specter who walks through life with me.

My fear of being assaulted with memories of him kept me away from my hometown. Even now, all these years later, those memories are trying to creep in on me.

I’m pretty sure if I look close enough, I can see the younger version of me walking through the aisle in front of me with Fletcher by her side. We’d stop by this store most days to grab some candy after school.

I was so full of dreams back then, so full of hope. That girl had no idea what it would feel like to miss someone so deeply there are times when I can’t breathe.

The air shifts around me slightly and my head snaps up. Standing there, at the end of the aisle looking like he’s just seen a ghost, is Fletcher Burns.

My eyes soak him up. He’s gotten taller, which I didn’t even know was possible because he was tall the last time I saw him. Or maybe he’s gotten broader and more imposing, and it makes it feel like he’s taller? I don’t know. His hair is longer on top than the sides and his dark eyes are moving over my body.

But it’s not the fact that Fletcher is looking at me after so many years which has my blood singing through my veins. It’s the look of pure hunger in his eyes. I want to run away just as much as I want to run toward him and jump into his arms.

Having Fletcher wrap his arms around me was always the best. Now his arms look even stronger. He’s clearly spent the last 13 years working at Limitless, just like he always planned.

Why does my tongue feel so thick in my mouth? My lungs start to burn, reminding me that I should breathe. But how can I breathe when the guy I remember and have loved for so long is standing in front of me, but has now transformed into a man?

My gaze flits down to his hands to find them clenched at his sides. What I don’t see is a wedding ring on his finger. I shouldn’t feel relief sweeping through me at the sight, but it does.

He’s standing as if he wants to stalk closer to me but is holding himself back. There isn’t a single part of me that doesn’t want his control to snap.

“Fletcher,” I whisper and the tension between us grows.

We take a step closer to each other at the same time, like we can’t help it, like we’re drawn to each other. Even after all these years.

It’s a heady feeling. I feel lightheaded and a little off-kilter. Fainting in the middle of the general store would not be a good look, or a good first impression on the man in front of me.

Would it even be a first impression since we’ve known each other our whole lives except for the last 13 years? It feels like it’s been a lifetime and no time at all. How is that even possible?

“Eden?” Fletcher blinks a few times, like he can’t believe I’m standing right in front of him. He shakes his head as if to clear it.

My heart pounds in my chest and I want to ask so many questions, ones I don’t deserve the answers to. Has he imagined seeing me again? Has he wanted to? Has he missed me as much as I’ve missed him? Has he regretted everything that happened in the past and all the ways our lives took us in opposite directions?

Just like I have?

I clear my throat, my mouth feeling dryer than it ever has in my whole damn life. I don’t even know what to say. I feel turtled. Yup, that’s me, the turtle who has their little legs kicking in the air while hoping someone comes along and turns it right side up.

It’s possible I start to nod? Because I am Eden, and he said my name more like a question than a statement. We take another step toward each other at the same time.

He’s so close and yet so far away. I don’t like it. I want him closer. The memories of how it feels to be pressed up against him fill my head. There’s not a doubt in my mind that it would feel even better now than it did back then.

The last 13 years have been kind to Fletcher. Very kind. At least from the outside.

“How-,” I start my attempt to cobble together some sort of sentence, but I’m interrupted.

“Mama!” Macklin’s voice feels like an atomic bomb going off in the middle of Wintervale’s Country Store. Fletcher’s eyes widen and my heart fucking drops as I spin toward my son who is looking so happy and eager as he bounds toward me. “I helped Gramps with the feed,” he sounds so damn proud of himself.

I crouch down and scoop him up in my arms while turning tentatively toward Fletcher. If I didn’t know any better, and maybe I do, I’d swear Fletcher’s eyes are glassy with tears. Fucking hell.

“You got all the big manly stuff done with Gramps?” Is my voice trembling with every word? Yeah, it definitely is.

How in the world did I forget all about Macklin being here with me today? Dad steps up next to me and rests his hand on my shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. I should have asked more questions over the years about Fletcher and how he’s doing.

It’s not really possible that he’s still single. Is it? He’s probably married with a whole ranch full of kids by now.