Page 39 of Broken Destiny

Light flashes behind my eyes and I suddenly find myself in the heart of the library again - that strange cavern-like chamber where I signed the book. I expect to see Duggar or one of the other library goblins, but the small space is empty. It offers the same comfort it did before, though. It’s a warm, soothing place, and it takes me several seconds to realize I’m standing in the middle of the room…on my legs. I look down, but they’re wispy in form, reminding me of Kodi’s appearance. Still, the sensation of standing tall without support feels like a miracle to me. I turn in a slow circle, marveling at the ability to do so without stumbling.

“Your body isn’t really here,” a voice murmurs. I jerk, my heart pounding against my chest. The shadows gather in the corners of the room, but I can’t actually make out any shapes in the darkness.

“Hello?” I call out. I’m not scared. I don’t think I can be in this place, not after I’ve bound my soul to it.

“Hello, child,” the voice speaks again. It’s a strange multi-tonal noise, and the only characteristic I can glean from it is that it’s feminine. A figure steps from the shadows, and my jaw drops as I look upon the magnificent beast-person. My mind trips. It’s half-beast, half-woman. Sphinx.

“Wow,” I whisper, unable to hide my awe. She’s fantastic. Golden feathered wings are tucked against her lioness form as she prowls forward. Her face is human, but twitching cat ears rise above her hair, and her smile is sharp with teeth when she aims it my way. Her eyes are slightly slanted like a cat’s, just enough to notice.

“Who are you?” I ask after my brain recovers the ability to form words.

The remarkable beast sits on her haunches directly in front of me, and I find one of my questions answered. Her breasts are on full display, but they’re covered in downy fur, so it’s almost like they’re hidden. It doesn’t seem obscene, which is what I was worried about. I think I’ll still wear a shirt if I shift, though. The thought steals my breath again. This is what I’ll change into? It’s almost too much, too fantastical to believe.

“You can call us Sage. Terribly unoriginal, we know, but that is what we are.”

I can’t help but look around the room. “We?”

Her cat ears twitch like she finds me amusing. “The form you see before you is just a projection, just as your body is still back in your quarters. We are an image of all the sphinxes that have come before you.”

I feel like I need to sit, regardless of my pleasure at being able to stand. It’s just too much. Will my consciousness upload into this being when I die? Am I speaking to the library herself?

“In a sense,” the creature answers as if she read my mind. They? I shake my head in confusion. “We are the library, but there is so much more to it than just this shape. There is magic within the walls, within the floor, and within the very books themselves. You should know this.”

Oh, I know there’s magic in books. I just hadn’t expected it to be so…literal. “I’m pleased to meet you,” I finally say, my manners arriving late as usual.

The beast’s smirk looks perfect on her feline form. All cats should be able to show such smug superiority with a similar expression. “You’ve already met us, child. This is just the first time in this form.”

“Right.” I nod, indicating that I understand even though I’m not sure I do. “Why am I here? Not that I’m complaining,” I add quickly.

“You doubt yourself. Your soul was crying out for guidance. And since you are our pupil, we called you here.”

I nod and take a deep breath. “Are you certain you have the right person, sphinx, woman, whatever, for the job? My memories scare me,” I admit in a quieter voice. “But more than that, I’m not sure I deserve those men upstairs. How selfish is it of me to want all four of them, to bind them to me?”

Sage cocks her head. Thinking of her as one being is easier than trying to encapsulate the many consciousnesses thingy. Her tail, long and muscular, sweeps the cavern floor behind her. “Selfishness has nothing to do with it. They were called to you for a good reason. Each one of them represents something different; each one touches a part of you that you may not even realize is important. And they’re not only offering you something. You are offering in return. They have all been ostracized just like you. They all doubt who they are and what they are meant to be. Everyone benefits from this mutual arrangement. They all knew exactly what they were getting into before they signed.”

I almost snort, thinking of Garrett. I don’t believe he doubts anything, but there is a reason he signed the book. I have something more important to address, though, something that’s been simmering in my mind for the short time I’ve been here. “Why didn’t I know what I was getting myself into? Why couldn’t I read the contract in its entirety?”

The cat flashes a toothy, feral smile. It turns her image from something majestic and awe-inspiring to something worthy of fear. Not for me, though; I will never fear her. “Your mind allowed you to assimilate the information you were prepared to understand. If you realized you were going to bind four guardians to you, would you have signed? If you knew you would be at the center of a war, would you have agreed?”

I shake my head, the answer instantly springing to my lips. “No. I’m not anything special. I’m not brave, whole, or worthy.” The last word is pulled from my throat, every insecurity I’ve ever carried rising to the surface.

The tail swishes again, and I sense irritation behind the movement. “It’s not bravery that you lack, child, it’s faith. We have the wisdom of centuries behind us. We chose you.”

I open my mouth to protest again, but Sage leans forward, her sharp teeth glinting in the light that I wasn’t sure had a source. “We chose you,” she repeats slowly. I swallow my words. Continuing to argue would only offend her, and I trust in the judgment of the creature before me. Something tells me she can’t be wrong, and it fills me with a small measure of pride. I was chosen for a reason.

I take a deep breath and nod. “All right then, I’ll try. I’ll try to be what you expect of me.”

The beast nods, approval gleaming in her catlike eyes. “You already are, but we believe you will also endeavor to be more. We have a favor to ask.” I wait nervously as she studies my features. “The faith that you don’t fully feel in yourself? You must have it in your guardians. They believe in you, and so too must you believe and trust in them.”

My brows draw together, but I don’t have time to respond before I’m forced from the cave and back into my body. It’s rather disappointing to look down, see that I’m sitting again and know I won’t be able to stand. The sphinx’s words follow me, ringing through my head. The statement was ominous, and I can’t help the feeling that something is going to happen - something that will rattle my faith and trust. Is she warning or preparing me? Does it matter? At least I have one thought that brings me comfort. I don’t have an issue believing in others; it’s only myself that I doubt.

It takes me several more minutes to compose myself, gather my crutches, and meet the others in the center of the library. Anticipation and fear scorch my veins. What will they expect? What does the library expect? I’ve never shifted before.

I search for Garrett. I’ve barely spoken to him, and we haven’t been alone yet. He’s frowning at the books in the bookcase near the table area on the first floor. He pulls a book from the shelf and opens it, but his grimace only grows when his eyes scan the page. I watch his facial expression for several minutes before he realizes I’m staring at him. When he puts the book back on the shelf, he looks almost ashamed, like he was caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to.

Kodi is nowhere to be seen, but that seems to be the norm lately when we’re all gathered. Avery and Bren are speaking quietly, and I can already see the bond forming between them. It makes my chest feel warm, a different kind of warmth than watching them yesterday had created. I push that thought from my mind as fast as it arrives, fully aware that the shifter is capable of discerning my more primal urges through smell alone. Will I be able to do that once I shift?

Garrett appears nervous when he sees me crutching toward him. I’m momentarily worried he’s going to dart into the stacks before I can reach him. But he stands his ground and squares his shoulders, making him appear even more massive.

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