He pauses. I pause.
His expression quickly fades at the realization of what he just said, after seeing my face fall presumably.
Something in his tone makes me think he’s beenwaitingto say this. Like it’s been bottling up inside him.
“Wait. Jasmine. I was out of line,” he says, his voice shaky. “I didn’t mean that.”
I see the regret painted across his face, but it’s too late.
My eyes go blank. “No. You just told me thetruth. The way you always do.” I direct my attention toward his shoulders when I say this, not able to look into his eyes right now.
“Jasmine,” he repeats.
I can’t hear him anymore.
It’s not like he just commented on my biggest insecurity, and used it against me to make me feel small. There was a reason I withheld this from everyone, except for my best friend. At least that removed the sense of power that anyone could hold over me.
I try to remind myself that they’re just words. But the same way words can shatter you no matter how much you wish they can’t, words also can’tfixyou the way you wish they could.
I get up calmly, untucking my hair from behind my ears as I head toward the door. That way he doesn’t notice the tears already welling up in my eyes.
The few words Luca managed to say stung far more than any comment I’ve received over the years by different guys I’ve had remote feelings for. Because at least with them, no trust was built.
Unlike the trust between Luca and me thatcrumblesbefore my eyes as I walk out of his suite.
CHAPTER 12
“So High School” – Taylor Swift
I DON’T KNOW WHY IT didn’t occur to me that we’d be taking a flight to Madrid for the football match, given how it’s a six-hour drive. It’s probably since I’ve been a little caught off guard with the way I feel while I’m around Luca to say the least.
The way things ended last night doesn’t slip my mind as I’m getting ready, though.
The conversation started out pretty well, which is why when I got back to my room, I tried to pinpoint the moment where it all went wrong.
To be honest,Istillsort of am.
But I’m not about to ruin the first and maybe only football match that I’ll be attending at this scale. And in Madrid of all places.
Of course I run into the one person who I don’t want to see as I’m making my way to the lobby. Although I can’t avoid Luca for too long since he’s coming with us, unfortunately.
The last thing I want to show is that I’m hurt. And to give him any satisfaction for how his words affected me. So I’m going to just actindifferent.
While the weather is nice and warm, the air between us feels chilly. A layer of apprehension is also on his face that I haven’t seen before as he greets me, “Hey.”
“Hey,” I reply casually as we ride the elevator down to the lobby together.
This much silence would usually kill me. But I don’t feel the need to say anything beyond this.
I guess he does as he sighs before looking over at me. “Jasmine, I’m sorry for what I said.”
I hate hearing him say my name because of how much I’ve grown to love it in this short amount of time, but all I do is briefly glance back at him and shrug. “No need to be sorry. I’m not even mad. You just reminded me what I already know.”
He looks like he doesn’t believe a word I just said, considering everything he knows about me, most likely also sensing that I’munusuallycalm. Luca knows talking is my weakness. Come to think of it, he knowstoo manyof my weaknesses. Which is exactly why this happened in the first place. Since he already showed me that he has no problem using them against me when he finds it convenient for him.
“Still, I shouldn’t have said that to you,” he replies. “It was a terrible thing to say.”
I raise a brow at him. “If it was so terrible, you wouldn’t have said it. And by the way, if I didn’t already tell you, you’re right about what you said.”