Page 37 of All at Once

“I was,” Luca confirms.

“He wasn’t with me when I saw you,” Enrique clarifies what I’m currently wondering about. “We met up later that night.”

Luca feigns a longing expression, while looking at me. “To think we could have metearlier.”

I laugh at the way his face is twisted. As well as the coincidence of it all.

I thought learning how to surf would be the highlight of my day. And it was fun, don’t get me wrong. But the simplicity of having a conversation with two guys like this made me feel normal for once. Since I always wondered how it would have felt like to have guy friends growing up.

It’s different than what I expected.It’s nice.

CHAPTER 6

“Anti-Hero” – Taylor Swift

ANY DOUBTS FROM EARLIER AT the beach went on the back burner when Enrique, to my surprise, asked me out for dinner tonight before we left to go back to the resort. It reassured me exactly why I’m here. And more so, how ready I am to start living out what’s only existed in my imagination thus far.

The date went pretty much how I expected it to go. Enrique being his usual charming self, while I thought about every little thing that I said before the fact.

That still wasn’t enough to stop me from putting my foot in my mouth, when I somehow managed to bring up a dick joke at one of his comments that I also happened toterriblymisinterpret.

The awkwardness must be simply from the fact that nothing was on my mind more than the possibility of my first kiss. Not the food, not the restaurant, and dare I even sayhim.

But now as he’s walking me back to my suite, I can’t focus on anythingbuthim and how his skin’s still glowing from surfing.

We’re currently discussing how we would prepare for our college exams or lack thereof, when Enrique laughs. “Studying for that final was insane. Me criticizing the books, you spending more than half the time trying to convince mewhythey were important.”

“Did I do that?” I play it coy. “I was too busy daydreaming to notice it.”

“Daydreaming about what?” Enrique asks, the flutter of his lashes somehow making his eyes curve even more.

I decide to just say it.“Of how much I had a crush on you.”

His brows quickly crease. “No you didn’t.” He looks as though he’s genuinely shocked, but also playful enough that I’m unsure if he ever noticed this before. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he then asks, confirming that he did in factneversuspect anything.

“You had a girlfriend,remember?” I remind him.

“Oh shit. That’s right. I forgot.” He leans in a little, his voice growing softer. “It’s a good thing we ran into each other then.”

“It’s almost like it was meant to be.” I regret that as soon as I finish the sentence. It’s too late to take it back now though. Before he can say anything, I backtrack, “Meant to be as in we got to see each other again, not meant to be as inwe’remeant to be. Cause that would be weird of me to say. At least out loud.”

How exactly is that me trying to make a terrible sentence better?

I once thought that in my twenties, these things would feel easier, talking to my crushes would geteasier. Instead, being in sheer proximity with guys that I like still makes me feel as if I’m about to sky-dive. My heart suddenly feeling as though it’s ten feet outside of my body, my logic nowhere to be found, and the butterflies in my stomach so strong that I’m not quite sure if I’m just really nauseous.

The exact way I’m feeling rightnow.

I’m so in my head as my heart continues to nervously jitter in my chest, wondering what’s going through Enrique’s head at the moment.

Then he laughs with wide eyes. “I forgot about your sense of humor.” Great. He thinks I’m a joke. “And how much I like it.” Okay.So he finds it endearing?

I take a deep breath, pretending to zone out abruptly, and then sarcastically poke fun at my own embarrassment, “Oh, you’restilltalking to me?”

He laughs again, and I swear he looks at my lips for a second.

Is thisthemoment?Could it finally be happening?

There’s silence. Not like a typical one that’s boring, empty, or sad. It’s a silence that pounds in my ears in anticipation forsomethingto happen.

---