Page 19 of Secrets, Lies and Love

I’m used to people trying to guess my desires before I even express them. And the number of flatterers increases considerably when it comes to women. They always seem eager to satisfy me.

“Why the rush for me to leave, Cecily?” I make the concession of not calling her Harper, remembering what Anderson told me about her stepmother, but on the other hand, I dose every word with a drop of seduction. I’m determined to make her bend to my will but also curious about why she seems so skittish.

I’m pleased when I notice she swallows hard, but then I’m confused when she crosses her arms in front of her chest to hide her breasts, which are very clearly outlined by her thin hospital gown.

She’s not reacting to me like women usually do. I was purposely softer when I asked her the question a moment ago, but that seems to have made her clam up even more.

Weird.

“I don’t want your money,” she repeats, “I want a job. The only thing I know how to do is take care of children or books. You don’t own a library, which rules out taking care of books, but you have a son. However, you’ve told me that you won’t allow me to be his babysitter because I’m distracted. I don’t think there’s anything I can do to convince you otherwise, so I need you to excuse me so I can change my clothes. I want to leave.”

“And where exactly are you going to go?” I ask, making it clear that I know that her financial situation is not the best. “Besides, you haven’t been discharged yet.”

“For some reason, the doctor said I would only be discharged after you came to visit me. You’re here and we’ve talked. Thank you for covering the hospital bill. I would like to say that I will pay you back one day, but I know that will be impossible, so I’ll just have to swallow my pride and accept it. With that out of the way, I don’t think we have anything left to say to each other.”

I study her to see whether she’s bluffing.

No, she means it, and there is so much dignity in her speech that if I were a sensitive man, I would feel bad.

But I’m not. Cecily has only piqued my interest with her courage in facing me.

“You are not qualified to be Joseph’s nanny.” I’m not the type to explain decisions to someone, but somehow, I find myself trying to delay our separation.

“Joseph? Is that his name?”

I nod.

“What happened to the previous nanny?”

“They never stay, for one reason or another.”

“I would.”

“You don’t qualify,” I say again when she gets up, but now my refusal has another reason.

I’d have to be dead not to notice that the fabric of the nightgown doesn’t do much to hide her body from me, and what I see looks delicious. Even with the shapeless clothes, I notice wide hips, which turns me on.

I run my gaze down her bare legs, lingering on her small, delicate feet. I should stop, but now I need to see more. So I continue my inventory of her body.

When I reach breast height, I see that her nipples are hard, pushing against the garment. She knows I’m lusting after her, but she doesn’t do anything to protect herself from me.

It’s not like I’m hiding my desire, either. She could cover herself or even go to the bathroom of the suite, but instead, she stays still, as if to mock me:You can look, but you can’t touch.

Is sweet Cecily a tease?

I’m hot for women who have hourglass bodies like hers, and even though I know we’re not going anywhere from here, I like what I see. I have no reason to disguise that.

“Because I’m clumsy?” she asks when I finally reach her face. Her breath comes in deep gasps, and that’s when I’m sure she’s also affected by me.

“Not just because of that,” I answer, without elaborating further on the matter, because now it has nothing to do with the fact that I think Cecily has serious problems with attention and motor coordination—it’s because her passive-aggressive manner, combined with her beautiful face and killer body, makes me want to go to her and find out what’s hiding under her hospital clothes.

I feel awakened in a way I haven’t felt in a long time. I date women on a regular basis. I love them as a group and also for the pleasure they give me, but I’m not used to feeling such a voracious need. In my world, when I want sex with a woman of my choosing, it is not a question of “if” I will have her but “when.”

I’ve never wanted someone who doesn’t want me back.

Cecily, who had already stolen my attention, has now also gained my desire as a bonus, and I’m wondering why. She’s not like the women I’m used to dating. She’s too young, not at all sophisticated, and despite her ethereal appearance, she’s as soft as a cactus.

She hasn’t done anything since I came in here other than confront me.

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