Page 12 of Falling for Her Protector

9

The After Party

Vanessa

My back slides down the wall until I’m resting on the cold tile floor. I drop my head, resting it against my knees. X. was completely disgusted by the thought of wanting me. He didn’t even have to say it. I could see the look in his eyes. He’ll never really want me after Grady ruined me.

But that kiss...

I felt it through my entire body, down to my toes. The way my skin tingled as his tongue moved with mine and his strong hands holding me. It was pure fireworks. And if he can create that feeling with just a kiss, I can’t help but wonder what else he’s capable of doing.

As I shift to stand again, something sharp pokes my hip and my hand drops to my pocket. Lacey’s keys. I need to get out of here, and this is the perfect solution. I can’t show my face out there now. I know that no one knows what just happened between us, but his rejection has me reeling and I just want to be alone. And I definitely can’t bear to watch him take some other girl back to his room.

I slip quietly from the bathroom. The noise from the party is overwhelming, even in the hallway. I take one look down towards Xavier’s door and see that it’s closed. I wonder if he’s in there or if he went back out to the party? I shake the thought away and move in the direction of the music.

I walk quickly around the edge of the crowded room, and feel Lacey’s gaze, but I can’t make eye contact. I keep moving, trying to keep my head down as I make my way towards the door. Just as I reach my destination, I hear her call my name.

Turning, I find her looking at me, the question swirling in her eyes. She raises her arms and shrugs. I hold up my hand showing her the dangling keys.

“Really?” she mouths and I nod. I can’t stay after what just happened with X. Even if no one knows, I still feel completely humiliated and I’m not feeling in the party mood anymore. She offers a small wave and I turn, making my exit.

* * *

A rush of adrenaline hits me as my foot presses down on the gas pedal. I haven’t driven a car in months, and I suddenly have this overwhelming sense of freedom. If I just keep driving, I can disappear in any direction I want. But where would I go?

Instead of hitting the highway, I find myself driving an old and familiar route until I’m parked just outside the house I grew up in. A place I called home. A place I once felt safe.

The house is dark. The driveway is empty and I don’t see any lights on inside. It almost looks abandoned. I kill the engine and open my door, walking slowly across the quiet street. I know I’m taking a chance going inside, but it’s no worse than what I’ve already been through. Plus, there are things inside that I need...things I want.

I find the door unlocked, and it opens easily for me to enter. It’s dark inside, as expected, but my eyes have already adjusted so I don’t bother turning on any lights.

“Dad,” I call out, but get no answer.

Glancing into the open living room, I can see dirty dishes piled on the coffee table, along with scattered paraphernalia. Apparently, they’re no longer trying to hide their habit. As I move to the stairs my feet catch on something. I look down and find my duffle bag. I had it in the car that day. Dad must’ve brought it in at some point.

I crouch down and pull the zipper, finding all my stuff still inside. I move a couple heavy text books out of the way, now just a waste of money, since I never got the chance to use them. I drop them on the floor with a heavy thud, and lift the bag as I stand. I’m taking the rest with me. I know my wallet and cell phone are both inside, but there is still one thing I want from my old bedroom.

I sling the strap up over my shoulder and take the stairs two at a time. My bedroom appears to be untouched, looking exactly the same as when I packed. I remember that morning so clearly. I felt light and excited to be leaving, heading back to school. I had no idea how much my life was about to change.

I move towards the closet and open the door, grabbing a few things and shoving them into the duffel. Turning, I stop at my dresser and pick up a picture frame. It holds a photo of me with my parents. I was only about two years old, and I don’t remember the day, but it has always been one of my favorites. I slip it carefully into the bag, then I lift the lid on my jewelry box. I pull out a delicate gold chain with a small dangling crescent moon. It once belonged to my mom, but now it’s mine. I set my bag down for a second to secure it around my neck before heading for the stairs again.

I drop the bag in the passenger seat and drive away, having no intention of ever going back. I feel a heavy sob lodge itself deep in my chest as I let the feeling wash over me. How did my life change so much? What happened to my world?

As I get closer to the apartment, that I now call home, I decide that I’m not really ready to go back there either. Instead, I pull into a small twenty-four-hour coffee shop and dig into my duffel in search of my wallet and phone. As expected, my phone is completely dead. But I find thirty dollars cash hiding inside my wallet. It’s definitely enough to get myself some food and a drink. As I step through the door, a small bell jingles announcing my arrival.

“Take a seat anywhere, honey. I’ll be right with you,” a soft voice fills my ears. I see a petite older woman smiling at me as she moves around behind the counter.

I find a seat on one of the round stools and inhale the smell of greasy bacon and fried goodness. Other than an older man sitting at the other end of the counter, and a couple whispering quietly in a booth, the place is empty. I grab the plastic-coated menu from beside the napkin holder and quickly make my decision.

“So, what can I get for you, sugar?” she smiles brightly.

“I’ll take a BLT on white with French fries. And a Coke, please,” I rattle off my order.

“Coming right up,” she spins around. I watch as she fills my cup with ice and soda, then turns back and sets it in front of me.

I empty half the glass as I wait for my food, which doesn’t take long. As devour my sandwich and fries, I let my mind go blank. Then suddenly there’s a spark. I should look for a job. If I can make a little money, I won’t have to depend on the continued generosity of Lacey and Xavier. I’ll start looking tomorrow.

* * *

---