Page 62 of Hell & Back

“I need to stay here for a while.” He held his breath and braced as he waited for her reaction.

“You’re not coming home?”

“No. Not right now.” His eyes shot to Tuck, hoping he’d help him out.

“Can I ask why?” She smoothed a strand of hair behind her ear.

He got to his feet and scrubbed his hands over his face, unsure what exactly he should say and still not hurt her too badly. “I just need to get my head on straight first.”

“Can’t you do that at home?” Kylie wasn’t giving up.

He wasn’t sure what else he could say, so he went with the truth she might understand. “I’m scared I’ll hurt you.”

“Why do you think you’d ever hurt me?” A deep vertical line pulled between her brows.

“Because they pumped me so full of that EZ Lay shit, I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin. I don’t know what’s in that shit, but it did something to me.”

“I’m not scared of you. You’d never hurt me,” she stated again. She took to her feet, crowding into his space and damn if he didn’t find that sexy as hell.

“I scare myself, Kylie!” He threw his arms out to his sides.

She remained silent after his outburst, but not for long. “What did they do to you?” She started to reach out and touch him with her hand, but stopped halfway. He wasn’t sure what she was thinking or if it was something on his face, but whatever it was caused her to drop her hand to her side.

“I,” he had to clear his throat and tried again. “I can’t talk abut it right now. Please, baby, just give me some time to work things out.”

She stared up into his face, the love she felt for him completely out there for him to see. “Okay. We’ll go for now. But you will be coming home. Soon.”

“Thank you.” He watched Kylie and Tuck leave and felt like total dog shit. He couldn’t believe Tuck hadn’t demanded to know what had happened as a way to shield her when it all came out. First and foremost, Tuck would protect Kylie from everything, including Darren, as he should.

He slowly took his seat on the side of the bed, his eyes settling on the sandwich Kylie made him. She was always taking such good care of him and Tuck. His appetite gone, he fell back and stared at the ceiling. How the fuck was he going to get himself straightened out enough to go home?

KYLIE

As soon as they arrived home, Kylie stripped down and went to take a quick shower. After being at the hospital and spending time in the Emergency Room waiting area, she felt like she was covered in germs. She stepped under the showerhead as Tuck came in to use the bathroom.

“I don’t understand why we couldn’t tell Darren we’ve seen the video of him and Sadie. He wouldn’t have had any reason to stay away.”

Obviously, seeing one of the men she loved having sex with another woman hadn’t been easy. As a matter of fact, until Tuck pointed out certain things, it had downright torn her apart. Once she realized what was truly happening and then having it confirmed by Bacon, she was able to find a way to deal with it. Neither he nor Sadie had been willing participants so that made it easier to get over the initial hurt of seeing them together. She’d already forgiven Darren in her head and in her heart. She loved him and wanted him to come home. The three of them were a family and without him here, they wouldn’t be whole.

Tuck flushed the toilet and went to lean against the counter. “We can’t tell him we saw the video because it would destroy him. If he knew we’d seen it, the man wouldn’t be able to live with himself.”

She rinsed the shampoo out of her hair and said, “Why can’t he talk to us? The three of us are in this together. We should be able to tell each other everything.”

“Baby, he’s the kind of man that once he gives his heart to a woman, he’ll never give it to another. It doesn’t matter that his head and heart were telling him not to have sex with Sadie at the same time his body was demanding that he did. He will see it as cheating on you. It would be him breaking an oath to love and honor you and to fuck another woman for any reason would be something he might not be able to deal with. Between that shit they gave him still running through his system and what happened with Sadie, I don’t know if his dick or his head will explode first. You heard what Bacon said about that fucking drug.”

Yes, she had heard what Bacon had said and it broke her heart. He’d told them how Darren had been given four dosesof the drug without the benefit of finding release. The longer he was denied a release, the more pain he would have suffered. Bacon also said that after he’d been given the third and then the fourth dose, it was beyond his control to keep his distance from a woman. He couldnotphysically keep away from Sadie and still keep his sanity. Luckily, Sadie had been drugged and in pain herself, but still able to give Darren consent. Had she not given consent…she didn’t want to think about what might have happened. And that right there was probably something weighing heavily on Darren’s mind. He’d rather die than hurt a woman.

“Yes, you’re right.” She rinsed the conditioner out of her hair and turned the water off. Tuck was there to hand her a towel as she stepped out.

“You don’t hold it against him that he had sex with her?”

“Does it bother me? Yes. It hurts my heart. Do I hold it against him? No. From what Bacon said they don’t know much about the drug and what they do know they’ve gotten from Darren and Sadie. They haven’t run across anyone who has been dosed as many times as Darren. He’s not even sure how long it will take to get out of his system or if it ever will. They don’t know the long-term effects.”

Tuck used another towel to dry Kylie’s hair. “We just need to give him time. He’ll come home.”

“How much time?” She turned to face him. “I miss him so much. With him gone, it’s like part of me is missing. It felt that way when you were shot and we didn’t know how bad you were.”

“Baby.” With a finger beneath her chin, he lifted her head until she was looking at him. “He loves you. Hold on to that and we’ll get him back soon.”

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