Page 68 of Hell & Back

“That about sums it up.”

“Why doesn’t he come home to Kylie?”

“He says he’s afraid he’ll hurt her.”

“Well if he doesn’t go to Kylie, do you think he’ll go to someone else?”

That was the question he’d been denying to himself and he was sure Kylie was already thinking about. “I don’t know. If he wasn’t drugged and suffering so much physically, I’d say hell no. But with what the Phantoms put him through, I don’t know what to think.”

“How’s Kylie taking this?”

“She’s hurting, but she’ trying to hide it. She’s also losing patience. As far as she’s concerned he should have come home with us the night we got him back. He should be working through things at home.”

“How much time do you think he needs?”

“Hell if I know. I just know that the longer he stays away the harder it will be for him to come home. Not because we don’t want him to, but because he won’t feel like he should.”

DARREN

It was Friday night, three nights since he’d been back in Redemption and gotten a blowjob from Tori. It took the edge off for a while, but not long enough. He’d felt so horrible that he’d hit the bottle, determined to drink until he passed out.

The fucking drug was making his life a living hell. He felt like his skin was too tight, like it could split open at anytime. If, no, when he got his hands on Crockett, he was going to beat the shit out of him, maybe shoot him up with his own drug and make him suffer for days just like he did Darren. The more he thought about that idea the better he liked it. It would be poetic justicebefore he killed him. And make no mistake, Crockett and fucking RIP were dead men walking.

An evil idea hit him that had him smiling for the first time in days. He should give the drug, several doses, to both men, then lock them in a room together and see what happened.

He ran his fingers through his hair, yanking on the ends hoping the sharp bite of pain would turn his mind from the pain in his dick. Didn’t work. It never worked. Other than the one blowjob he’d gotten, he’d spent most of his time in his room, drinking until he passed out. Unfortunately, he didn’t think he could hold out much longer to have sex. His stomach couldn’t take anymore booze.

Yesterday he’d called Bacon and begged him to give him some sleeping pills. Something, anything that would knock him out until this never ending need to fuck passed. To Darren’s utter disbelief Bacon had told him he couldn’t do that because he wasn’t sure what his reaction would be. He then dropped a bomb on Darren that had him dropping his ass to his bed. He’d told him that not only had he been dosed with Euphoria, but there was something else mixed with it. Aripiprazole.

“What the fuck is that?” Darren settled his elbows on his knees and held the phone to his ear. He closed his eyes, wondering why this shit had to happen to him. He had a great life, a perfect life before Crockett decided to use him as a guinea pig. Surprisingly, the anger he was feeling was almost equal to the constant pain in his dick.

“It’s an antipsychotic.”

“The fuck?” he grumbled. It just kept getting better.

“I did some research and found a case study that told of a man prescribed aripiprazole and had the unfortunate side effect of hypersexuality. He had a hyperactive libido and was obsessed with engaging in sexual activities and had an uncontrollableurge to masturbate. When the medicine was discontinued all hypersexuality symptoms ceased within a few days.”

“Well that’s just great, Doc. It’s already been a few days. Why do I still feel the urge to fuck until my dick falls off? Fuck! I still hurt all the damn time and I would love to be able to jack off to find some relief, but that doesn’t seem to be an option for me.” He rubbed his face. “I’m sorry. It’s not your fault I’m fucked up. I shouldn’t take my anger out on you.”

“It’s fine. In your case, the aripiprazole was mixed with Euphoria, so I have no idea how long your symptoms will last. We’ve never had a case like yours.”

“You know, this would be funny if I was single. Hell, Jed would have a field day with it.” He apologized once more to Bacon, said goodbye and hung up.

Unable to stand himself any longer, he hopped on his bike and rode until he needed gas, then drove farther. He did a lot of thinking while he was riding and for the most part everything came back to that fucker Crockett and Darren’s burning need for revenge. Then without his consent, his thoughts would drift to Kylie and how hurt she would be to find out he’d had sex with Sadie. And if that wasn’t bad enough, he’d gotten a blowjob from Tori. He knew Kylie wanted him to come home so she could be the one he turned to when the need hit him. With the way he was feeling, he was afraid he’d hurt her in her pregnant state. The fucking drugs were making him feel aggressive and the need to dominate her wasn’t something she needed to deal with at this time. Honestly, all of that he could probably deal with with Tuck’s help. He would make sure Darren didn’t go too far. The biggest reason he was finding harder and harder to ignore was that he no longer felt worthy of her.

By the time he turned around and came back to Redemption, the control he had over the pain was slipping. Fast. He couldn’t go back to the clubhouse like this because he’d end up doingsomething stupid like bringing a woman back to his room. Tori said she was there for him anytime he needed her but the club would be packed with people tonight. The last thing he needed was word getting back to Kylie that he was brining women back to his room. Given most of the single brothers would be at the clubhouse trolling new pussy with the numerous hang arounds that attended, he pointed his bike toward Bottom’s Up.

He pulled around back and parked his bike, settling his helmet on the handlebars before entering the back door. He punched in the code and stepped inside. The hallway was dimly lit, but provided enough light that no one would break their neck moving through it. He checked the time on his phone and was shocked to see his hand was shaking. Goddamn, he was so weak. He needed sex like a junkie needed his next hit. Keeping to the shadows, he climbed the back stairs to the VIP area. There was no one at the Sons’ reserved table. Maybe his luck would hold. He stood at the railing, watching the girls dance from the dark recesses found conveniently throughout the area. One of the waitresses stopped to get his drink order before moving off to deliver a tray of drinks to one of the tables.

By the time she returned, he could feel a light sweat forming across the back of his neck, his cock and balls were throbbing and the shaking in his hands had increased. He started to hand her a fifty, but held onto it at the last minute. The drinks for the brothers were all free since they owned the place, so whatever money he handed to her was strictly for tips. When she reached for it, he pulled it back ever so slightly until she was looking up at him. “I want you to send Sherry to one of the VIP rooms when she’s finished with her dance.”

“Okay,” the waitress whose name he forgot smiled and tugged at the money.

“I don’t want anyone to know. I want your word you’ll keep your mouth shut.”

“Of course. I won’t say a word.”

Darren released the money and tipped the bottle back. He watched from his position above as the waitress disappeared down the hall toward the dressing room. A few minutes later, he asked one of the bouncers to give him a room and to send Sherry in when she came upstairs. He didn’t have to worry about the bouncer talking. The three bouncers who worked the VIP area had tight lips. They were kind of like those three monkeys—see nothing, hear nothing, say nothing. He finished the beer he’d carried in and placed it on the table in front of the couch. There was a bottle of scotch on a shelf near the bed that had his name written all over it. He broke the seal and took a couple of deep pulls. He felt the immediate burn hit his throat, down his chest, settling in his stomach. Fuck, that felt good.

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